well.. i forgot this journal existed
i was suprised when i read the only entry i have on here! It was before i lost contact wiv Paul.. my broadband connection was cut! I never did get to meet him that day.. so bloody long ago too! I havnt spoken to him since late November when he was suffering with Glandular fever! - same reason he could'nt see me. I heard that the train tickets are kept at his old boarding school in a frame as a momento of him! Hes now living in Brussels, i think he likes it there.. tho he says he misses english people n playing squash. Havent thought of Paul properly in weeks.. but this morning i got an email from him, sent on my birthday- the 26th - just before midnight, after not hearing from him in over a month it was a shock to read him sayin 'i still love you', that was all the msg said too. Im feeling really lost and a bit guilty. I wonder.. had things been different would i be with him now? Would we have met up at last?!
Recently my love life has taken all the worst turns at all the wrong times. My latest boy friend was called Tom Hadon.. hes a bit older than me, blond, tall, id say good looking too, and he wears glasses. He's extremely flirtatious.. guess thats how i ended up noticing him. Recieved a belated birthday prez from him this morning.. a hude bouquet of flowers .. freesias, my fave!
I broke up wiv him.. nearly a month ago im guessing. He didnt take it so well. All break ups are messy but this one was particularly.. it wasnt the first time we'd broken up.. the first time i finnishede it was cos i was missing Paul so much.. it didnt feel at all right bein with anyone that wasnt Paul. Tom has a way of growing on u though.. and i found that not bein wiv him.. after two weeks i missed him heck of a lot!
He deliberately made it tricky for me to get over him.. txts sayin i love you or i miss you or even 'i wish u were here wiv me, just lyin in my arms' :(. he's doin the same again this time .. but with other means of manipulation such as flirtin with other girls when im around. I dont have the right to be jealous.. but it cant be helped! With all the complications between me an Tom.. i just forgot to worry or miss Paul and so.. gettin this email. Its put a cruel spin on my day. Im confused all over again. Better go.. this is already too long.. maybe months from now i'll look backon this n think wot the fuck was i on!?! .. heres hoping!
Lilz x
Recently my love life has taken all the worst turns at all the wrong times. My latest boy friend was called Tom Hadon.. hes a bit older than me, blond, tall, id say good looking too, and he wears glasses. He's extremely flirtatious.. guess thats how i ended up noticing him. Recieved a belated birthday prez from him this morning.. a hude bouquet of flowers .. freesias, my fave!
I broke up wiv him.. nearly a month ago im guessing. He didnt take it so well. All break ups are messy but this one was particularly.. it wasnt the first time we'd broken up.. the first time i finnishede it was cos i was missing Paul so much.. it didnt feel at all right bein with anyone that wasnt Paul. Tom has a way of growing on u though.. and i found that not bein wiv him.. after two weeks i missed him heck of a lot!
He deliberately made it tricky for me to get over him.. txts sayin i love you or i miss you or even 'i wish u were here wiv me, just lyin in my arms' :(. he's doin the same again this time .. but with other means of manipulation such as flirtin with other girls when im around. I dont have the right to be jealous.. but it cant be helped! With all the complications between me an Tom.. i just forgot to worry or miss Paul and so.. gettin this email. Its put a cruel spin on my day. Im confused all over again. Better go.. this is already too long.. maybe months from now i'll look backon this n think wot the fuck was i on!?! .. heres hoping!
Lilz x