(no subject)
Alright so yeah before I start I just want to say that im not writing this so people can feel sorry for me I just really need help!!!!!!!!! K so for a while now I have been kinda getting sick of Jessica becuz she has changed so much and its not for the better and I just really really bugs me but I have delt with it and was going to continue doing it because she is one of my best friends and we have been friends for a long time so ya no u just deal with stuff like that when ur in that position. Well the dealing with it plan didn’t turn out good becuz I made the dumb mistake of thinking that Shannon was my best friend and I could talk to her about stuff. Yesterday I was really tired and cranky and just the littlest things were making me made ya no everyone has those days so being like this the whole Jessica thing got on my nerves way more then before so I was talkin to Shannon after school and I said some things to her about Jessica that I didn’t mean and should not have said people do that when they and frustrated and upset. Oh and one important thing to no about this story is that I am not the only one that thinks Jessica has changed a lot I am DEFINITLY not the only one im just the only one that has enough guts to tell her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway so I turns out that Shannon told Jessica everything that I said and so she came up to me today and said I don’t know y u think im such a bitch and y u hate me sooo much. And I want u to no that I don’t talk about u behind ur back then I told her that the whole bitch and hating her thing was me being mad and that I didn’t mean it and that I was really sorry for that. And I was upset becuz she has changed so much and I don’t like it and she told Kyle that I would just have to deal with it. Oh and paige isn’t talkin to me for some reason but w/e I don’t even care!!!!!! So at lunch paige and Shannon and Jessica all sat at a different table cuz there wasn’t any room at ours so I was there with all of Kyle’s friends and I didn’t go sit over by them becuz paige wasn’t talkin to me and Jessica I wasn’t really sure about so pretty much I new I would just set there and stare at the wall!!! Then when hse got done eating Shannon came by me and said we only sat there cuz there was no room over here and I said I no then she stood there for a min. and went back with Jessica and paige. Then in Spanish I talked to Shannon a little and I was ganna talk to her on the bus but apparently it doesn’t really matter to her that we barly talk cuz she sat with ethan even though she saw me and could have said no I don’t I want to set with tiffany but I guess she didn’t want to so whatever. I mean I no that I have not been like talkative to Shannon but that’s only becuz I could not believe she told Jessica that I mean I was just talkin to her I thought that she was someone I could talk to I mean I had to tell someone I couldn’t just keep it all inside I thought I cold trust her and I thought she would just be there for me when I was sooo frustrated and just needed her to listen but I guess I was wrong!!! Now I really just don’t know what to do I really feel like I have lost all my friends!!!!!! Oh another thing I no that all my friends are ganna say is we don’t hang out with u becuz u are always with kyle! Alright true I am always with kyle I will admitt that but it is becuz all we do is follow Jessica around and do what she wants and I am not ganna do that, that isn’t fun for me so yeah that’s y I don’t hang out with them that much!!! So im really lost and frustrated I am mostly scared that Ive lost Shannon cuz we don’t talk in school only a little in Spanish we don’t hang out at games we don’t hang out in the morning we don’t set together on the bus and we don’t talk on the phone after school! I mean I no that I am with kyle when maybe she want to hang out with me when we don’t have to follow jess but she never tells me I have told her over and over again that if im with him and she wants to talk or hang out then all she has to do is say something and I will but she doesn’t so if I don’t know then there isn’t really anything I can do. So think what im ganna do is just keep on goin on with my life and let Shannon do whatever she wants I mean im not ganna say will u plezz just hang out with me she has to choose to hang out with me im ot ganna ask her to if she doesn’t want to and hopefully she will figure out that I have always been there for her and I have always been the best friend that I could even if a lot of the time I don’t get it back and I feel taken for granted I still am as good a friend as I can to her. But yeah I guess that’s it if anyone has any advise for me then leave a comment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just want ot say sorry to Jessica for everything I said and to paige for whatever I did to her!!! And sorry to all of u that have to put up with me I no I have been on the bitchy side latly I am extremely stressed out and tired all the time and I really do apologize!!!!!!! And thank u to kyle, kelly, Laura, and Brittany. U guys have really helped with my stress and I no u will always be there for me!!!!!
Love always Tiffany