Commercials I Hate, Vol. 3
Product: Juicy Fruit Gum
Opening: Guy in pajamas and robe is out on his lawn with a Frisbee. Around a bush comes his loyal and playful pet, a GIANT FRICKIN ANT.
Guy throws Frisbee, which the GIANT FRICKIN ANT catches in its slobbery mandible. It is not explained why this guy couldn't be arsed to put on some proper pants before going out to romp with his hymenopteroid pal.
Guy takes out a stick of Juicy Fruit gum. GFA comes over, sniffing at him with its antenna, and the guy is stupidly all like "Uh uh uh, no delicious fruit flavored gum for you", to which the GFA responds by headbutting the guy over 20 feet.
The dude now realizes that it was a bad idea to tease an 8-foot-long insect, and locks himself in his car. The ant rips the door right off its hinges, of course, and drags the guy by the foot down into its anthole. The last thing you see is his hand, still stubbornly holding up the gum.
Moral of the story: Chew our gum and be devoured by giant frickin ants.
Alternate moral: When attacked by giant ants, just drop the goddamn gum already.
Opening: Guy in pajamas and robe is out on his lawn with a Frisbee. Around a bush comes his loyal and playful pet, a GIANT FRICKIN ANT.
Guy throws Frisbee, which the GIANT FRICKIN ANT catches in its slobbery mandible. It is not explained why this guy couldn't be arsed to put on some proper pants before going out to romp with his hymenopteroid pal.
Guy takes out a stick of Juicy Fruit gum. GFA comes over, sniffing at him with its antenna, and the guy is stupidly all like "Uh uh uh, no delicious fruit flavored gum for you", to which the GFA responds by headbutting the guy over 20 feet.
The dude now realizes that it was a bad idea to tease an 8-foot-long insect, and locks himself in his car. The ant rips the door right off its hinges, of course, and drags the guy by the foot down into its anthole. The last thing you see is his hand, still stubbornly holding up the gum.
Moral of the story: Chew our gum and be devoured by giant frickin ants.
Alternate moral: When attacked by giant ants, just drop the goddamn gum already.