happy- reflections cont.
I don't think I managed to convey my feelings in my last post- just why they are possible. I feel like Topher and I are capable of being on a 2-person ship through life together. That is the image I get. Yes, we both have much that we want to do apart from each other, and many friends and projects, but I feel a sense of comfortable union that I never imagined. We have so much to give each other every day, and we challenge each other, stimulate growth, spark new ideas... and yet we can play like kids, be completely cozy doing housework together, and be wonderful lovers to each other.
I had imagined a lot of things, and a lot of things I thought I would want, but I never actually knew this existed- not like this. I think it took being comfortable alone. I think it took taking love for granted before- and realizing too late (Jon). It took living with someone for 5 years and learning to compromise and be a team, and yet also to learn when I have compromised too much- even if that can make everything work (Jeremy). It took learning that the most beautiful romantic person, situation and story I could dream up does not make a relationship actually work(Jonas). I think it took having a relationship so icky that I stopped wanting to ever pick at inconsequential stuff ever again (and knew the difference).
I could not have imagined the road that got me to this inredibly beautiful place, but I am so, so happy.
I had imagined a lot of things, and a lot of things I thought I would want, but I never actually knew this existed- not like this. I think it took being comfortable alone. I think it took taking love for granted before- and realizing too late (Jon). It took living with someone for 5 years and learning to compromise and be a team, and yet also to learn when I have compromised too much- even if that can make everything work (Jeremy). It took learning that the most beautiful romantic person, situation and story I could dream up does not make a relationship actually work(Jonas). I think it took having a relationship so icky that I stopped wanting to ever pick at inconsequential stuff ever again (and knew the difference).
I could not have imagined the road that got me to this inredibly beautiful place, but I am so, so happy.