wedding prep
My brother Laurence is getting married tomorrow. New experiences for me include (don't read if meat grosses you out):
- getting a manicure
- having a full-body spray-on tan (to cover up "farmer's" shirtsleeve tan and pimples all over shoulders. I figured why the hell not give it a try, for once in my life I can say I tried it.)
- eating ostrich meat (ditto about saying I tried it.)
- leading a group of drunk girls in an impromptu jazz moves warmup to get them up and dancing at the bachelorette at a jazz club. (mainly smile-and-frantically-try-to-think-up-moves-that-are-sexy-and-don't-feel-like-aerobics.)
- finally getting a chance to bust out my prize Hungarian phrase "it's raining."
- pulling over and telling my uncle to get out of the car and walk to his hotel (in said rain) if he didn't stop back-seat driving.
- buying 3 pairs of seam-up-the-back 3/4 length stockings. Ruining 1 pair by nearly gluing them permanently to my foot, necessitating a frantic run to find spares.
- buying a garter belt to hold up said stockings.