Chapter 8 - wherein our protagonist speaks of the silver lining in getting dumped and a sore groin
For about 6 weeks earlier this fall, I was dating a fellow speedskater (not a rollergirl). There were two big firsts in this unfortunately short relationship. #1 - she is my age (little bit older, actually); #2 - I didn't have to work around her; it was completely easy to be around her, which probably explains why she said I'm the most laidback person she knows.
I got dumped. For what turned out to be the last date we made plans for, she would supply the wine and I would cook us dinner, at her house. That morning, I got a voicemail from her (didn't hear my phone ring), stating something's come up, and could we reschedule for the next night. I was more than a little disappointed, but she did say reschedule. She wound up not getting back in touch with me for 8 days. It was a long conversation, but essentially she did (committed?) a "first strike" or pre-emptive break-up. Things haven't worked out with other men, so she decided to break up with me, because "you'll wind up leaving me just like all the other guys".
There are some related tangents before I get to the silver lining - I made a grand gesture (and can now recommend a florist in Buda, if you need one), the tale of the first kiss (not an un-gentlemanly tale), etc.
So here's the upside for me in all of this - I just realized yesterday that I wasn't the one to end things, make things more complicated, sabotage myself. It's taken a lot longer than I'd have preferred, but I've finally broken an old pattern of sabotaging myself; I want to keep it up. If she comes back at some point, I'll have to consider things very carefully. Regardless of whether we get back together or not, I hope she stops punishing herself; she'll be a lot happier that way. She's got a lot of strength, but I know in intimate detail how hard it is to break old habits.
Now, on to the groin! Nothing to ribald to share - just did many more miles on the bike without stopping than I have before. Ak!
I got dumped. For what turned out to be the last date we made plans for, she would supply the wine and I would cook us dinner, at her house. That morning, I got a voicemail from her (didn't hear my phone ring), stating something's come up, and could we reschedule for the next night. I was more than a little disappointed, but she did say reschedule. She wound up not getting back in touch with me for 8 days. It was a long conversation, but essentially she did (committed?) a "first strike" or pre-emptive break-up. Things haven't worked out with other men, so she decided to break up with me, because "you'll wind up leaving me just like all the other guys".
There are some related tangents before I get to the silver lining - I made a grand gesture (and can now recommend a florist in Buda, if you need one), the tale of the first kiss (not an un-gentlemanly tale), etc.
So here's the upside for me in all of this - I just realized yesterday that I wasn't the one to end things, make things more complicated, sabotage myself. It's taken a lot longer than I'd have preferred, but I've finally broken an old pattern of sabotaging myself; I want to keep it up. If she comes back at some point, I'll have to consider things very carefully. Regardless of whether we get back together or not, I hope she stops punishing herself; she'll be a lot happier that way. She's got a lot of strength, but I know in intimate detail how hard it is to break old habits.
Now, on to the groin! Nothing to ribald to share - just did many more miles on the bike without stopping than I have before. Ak!