fic: If the Daylight Feels Like It's a Long Way Off (X-Men: First Class)
Title: If the Daylight Feels Like It's a Long Way Off
Fandom: X-Men: First Class
Rating: teen (language)
Pairing(s): Darwin/Havok
Notes: 2,570 words. I borrowed the villain from the comics canon, but you should be fine if you're only familiar with the films. Many thanks to sail_aweigh for looking this over.
Summary: A fight with a mysterious new mutant goes badly, and Darwin and Havok end up trapped underground. Darwin adapts easily, but the complete darkness triggers one of Havok's unpleasant childhood memories and leaves him feeling rather helpless.
Darwin opens his eyes and raises his head slowly. The last thing he remembers is Alex’s warning shout as the floor heaved and then split beneath their feet. He glances around warily. They must have fallen into some sort of cave, possibly an abandoned mineshaft. The walls are rough and high. When Darwin inhales, cold dank air fills his lungs and seems to settle there. He can tell that it’s pitch black, but he can see just fine thanks to his mutation.
With a groan, he rolls onto his side, then pushes himself unsteadily to his feet, brushes himself off, and starts to look for Alex.
Darwin finds him easily enough. He’s curled in a ball a few yards away. There’s dust in his hair and scratches on his face, but he doesn’t appear to have suffered any serious injuries. He is, however, trembling visibly, and his eyes are huge and black like they’re straining to drink in light that simply isn’t there.
Darwin kneels in front of him. “Alex,” he says gently.
At the sound of his voice, Alex jerks his head and squints, though he clearly can’t see anything. “Darwin?” His voice is uncharacteristically high and thin, his breaths quick and shallow. He must be on the verge of panic.
“I’m right here,” Darwin assures him quickly. “Right in front of you.”
“I can’t see you.”
“I know.” He lifts a hand toward Alex’s face, then pauses. “I’m gonna touch you, okay? Don’t freak out. It’s just me.”
Alex swallows and nods.
Darwin cups his cheek, tilting his head back slightly so that they’re eye to eye. He sweeps the pad of his thumb across the bony ridge under Alex’s eye, wiping away dust and what he suspects might be a tear streak. “It’s okay,” he says.
Alex grabs his wrist and holds on tight.
“Are you hurt?” Darwin asks.
Alex shakes his head.
“You sure?”
“Yeah. I just … I dunno.”
“Don’t like the dark?”
“No.”
Darwin frowns. Alex’s response was suspiciously emphatic. Before he can decide how best to phrase his question Alex says, “When I was little, like five or six, I stayed with this woman for a couple of months. When I was bad, she locked me in her linen closet. Just for an hour, maybe two. It was really dark.”
Darwin’s stomach clenches. His father walked out when he was four, and his mother thought his mutation was some sort of punishment. God’s retribution for marrying a man her parents didn’t like, or skipping church too often, or whatever sin she thought she’d committed. But she mostly ignored Darwin; she never hit him or sent him to his room without supper, or even yelled at him much. He spent most of his time playing quietly in his room anyway.
He wonders what Alex means by bad. Now isn’t the time to ask, though. They need to find a way out of here. He strokes Alex’s cheek again. “That was a long time ago. Long ago, before we were superheroes.” That’s a nice way to think about the past, he supposes. Before we were superheroes. Another lifetime, in other words.
Alex licks his lips, grimacing when he inadvertently swallows dust. “I used to try to pretend my brother Scott was there too, and we were hiding out from mobsters or aliens or something. It sort of helped. Okay, not really. But it stopped me from just blowing the whole place up.” He laughs shakily, but he sounds a little bit more like himself.
“Come on,” Darwin says, starting to rise. “If there was a way in, there’s gotta be a way out. We just have to find it. Then you can blast your way through it.”
Alex looks doubtful, but he doesn’t resist when Darwin tugs him to his feet. Because he can’t see, he stumbles, flailing instinctively with his free hand. Darwin catches him before he can send them crashing back to the floor, gripping his biceps and holding him steady.
“This is so stupid,” Alex groans. “Vulcan’s long gone by now. The professor’s gonna go ape.”
“The professor’s gonna be glad Vulcan didn’t kill us. At least now we know he isn’t working with Magneto.”
“I guess.”
“It’s something. C’mon.”
Alex sighs and looks at him. He seems to be able to guess where Darwin’s face is, though he can’t quite find his eyes. There’s something kind of comical about the way his gaze darts from Darwin’s chin to his forehead to his ear. Laughing at him would be mean, though, so Darwin bites his lip.
“What?” Alex says.
“Nothing.”
“No, really-”
Partly to forestall any more questions and partly because he just really wants to right now, Darwin says, “I’m gonna kiss you. Okay?”
Alex raises his eyebrows. “You don’t have to ask.”
“Don’t want it to seem like it’s coming out of nowhere.” He lets go of Alex’s hand so he can cup his cheek again. Shifting their positions slightly while being careful not to unbalance Alex, Darwin brings their mouths together.
As he’d half-suspected, Alex’s confidence comes surging back immediately. He leans into the kiss, tilting his head for a better angle, his hands finding Darwin’s hips instinctively. He opens his mouth, but Darwin is determined to keep things light - there’ll be plenty of time for more when they get the hell out of here - so he just teases at Alex’s lips with the tip of his tongue, eliciting first a chuckle and then a whine of frustration.
“Don’t wanna lose track,” Darwin murmurs.
“I do.”
Darwin kisses a corner of his mouth. Then, because he really can’t resist that pout, even when the supervillain is escaping and they’re buried who-knows-how-many feet below the ground, he pushes his tongue between Alex’s lips, probing deeply for a languid moment or two, before pulling back.
“Fuck,” Alex gasps.
“When we’re out of here,” Darwin promises. “Which will be soon. Just hold on to me.”
“Yeah, okay.” Alex fumbles for Darwin’s hand, finds it, and grips it tightly. “Can you see anything? Any kind of exit?”
Once again, Darwin scans the high, rough walls of their prison. “Not a damn thing.”
“Well, we got here from somewhere.”
“I know.” Reluctantly, he says, “I could try climbing the walls, see if there’s anything. I’d have to leave you alone down here, though.”
Alex is silent for a moment. His grip on Darwin’s hand tightens. Then he says, “Do it. I’ll be fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah.” He doesn’t sound sure, but he nods vigorously. “Yeah, I … just … gimme updates, you know? Don’t be too quiet. Okay? And, uh, don’t just look for holes in the wall. Feel for air currents and, uh, listen for, you know, running water. I read a lot of Hardy Boys,” he explains, even though he can’t possibly see the amused look on Darwin’s face.
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
There’s a pause.
“Hey, Alex? You gotta let go of my hand.”
“Oh, yeah.” Alex takes a long, shaky breath, then releases him.
“Hey,” Darwin says. “It’s gonna be okay. Just sit tight. You don’t have to pretend anything; I’m not leaving you here.”
“I know. Hey, you better get going. The sooner you do, the sooner we’re out of here, right?”
“Right.” Darwin toes off his boots and socks and walks to one of the cave walls. When he touches it with his palm, nothing happens. Undiscouraged, he lifts his foot and sets it against the wall. Still nothing. Biting his lip, he claws at the wall, scrabbling for purchase, and that’s when his body figures out what it needs to do. His fingers and toes become longer and more flexible, their pores excreting an adhesive substance that allows him to scramble froglike up the wall.
Groovy, he thinks. To Alex, he says, “I’m about eight feet up now. Just hold tight.”
“I’m holding tight.”
Darwin doesn’t like the quaver in his voice, but there’s nothing he can do about it now. He concentrates on climbing. After he’s gone a few more yards, he hears Alex say, “Hey - Darwin? Don’t tell anyone what a total fucking coward I was, okay? Especially not Hank.”
Darwin’s a little surprised that Alex even thinks he has to ask, but he doesn’t say that. “You’re not a coward.”
“Yeah, okay.”
“So,” Darwin says in as conversational a tone as he can manage while climbing, “the Hardy Boys, huh?”
“Half the foster homes I stayed in had them.”
“Hey, no need to sound so defensive. I’m not judging. I just don’t think I’ve ever seen you read anything besides…” He was going to say comic books, but that does sound kind of judgmental.
“I’m not a nerd,” Alex huffs. “What is this, a book club?”
Darwin snorts. Alex is getting pretty testy down there. He’d better hurry.
Fortunately, he thinks he’s getting somewhere. For the past few minutes, he’s been aware of the fact that the cave wall does not go straight up, but in fact slopes at about a sixty-degree angle. He wonders if they slid down this way after Vulcan destroyed the floor … and that’s when he feels the breeze, like the brush of a feather across his seeking fingertips.
He freezes.
“Alex?” he calls.
“Yeah?”
“Think I found something.” Clinging to the wall with one hand and both feet, Darwin stretches his free arm upward. He doesn’t feel anything, no fissures in the rock. And yet, he’s sure the breeze was real. He didn’t imagine it.
“What is it?” Alex asks. “What did you find?”
“Not sure. Hang on.”
“Okay,” Alex mutters. “Okay, okay…”
Damn. His voice is getting breathy and high-pitched again. Darwin gropes along the wall, feeling with his elongated fingers. Come on, he thinks. Come on, there has to be…
And there it is.
His heart sinks.
Modulating his tone carefully, Darwin says, “I’m coming back down. Don’t move. I’m gonna land…” He glances over his shoulder, gaging the distance. “…About four feet to your left.”
Darwin springs. As he plummets, he feels his bones becoming lighter, the cave air filling his embrace. He lands in a crouch, on the balls of his feet, with barely a sound.
Alex spins in his direction. “Is that-”
“It’s me.” Darwin rises quickly and catches one of Alex’s hands. By now, his fingers and toes have reverted to their normal length. “We have a problem.”
“Oh, great. Because our lives were getting so boring lately.”
Darwin gives his hand a squeeze, noting that his palm is cold and slightly clammy. “I found an opening,” he says in a calm, measured tone. “It’s too small to fit through. And if you try to blast it open, I think the cave might collapse.”
Alex frowns. “So, then how did we-”
“There might be another exit. I didn’t see anything else, but… Or Vulcan might have sealed things off after we fell. I don’t know. It isn’t hopeless, though,” he continues hurriedly, as Alex’s hand is starting to tremble. “Professor X and the others know where we were headed. When they don’t hear from us, they’ll start looking. The professor can use Cerebro to find us. Hank and Sean can figure out how to get us out of here. It’ll be a while, but it’ll be okay. Alex? What?”
Alex is shaking his head. His eyes are wide and pale; they seem to be drinking up the darkness. “You go,” he says. “Get help. I’ll wait here.”
“Don’t be stupid.”
“I’m not being stupid. You could squeeze through, right? You could adapt. You should go. It could be hours before anyone even thinks about looking for us. What are we supposed to do? Just sit here and wait? That’s fucking stupid.” He’s trying to sound angry, but he’s shaking hard now. He jerks his hand out of Darwin’s grip and shouts, “I chose solitary, remember? I don’t need a fucking babysitter!”
“Nobody said-”
“Just go!”
Alex lunges at Darwin - probably to shove him away - but he misses and stumbles. Darwin catches him by the shoulders and lets Alex take one more half-hearted swing before folding him in his arms and holding his shuddering body close. “I’m not leaving you,” he whispers, his lips brushing the shell of Alex’s ear.
“What if nobody comes to get us?”
“Somebody will come. The professor will send somebody. It might take him a while, but he isn’t the kind of person who just gives up on people. I’m not leaving you alone in the dark. Don’t make me say it again.”
For what seems like a long time, Alex stands there stiffly in his embrace, his heart hammering between their bodies. Then gradually, almost muscle-by-muscle, he starts to relax. He lets slip a tired-sounding sigh and turns his head so that it tucks neatly against the curve of Darwin’s neck.
“Feel like such a panty waist,” he mutters. “Don’t tell anyone.”
“Not telling a soul,” Darwin promises. “And hey, maybe I just don’t like the idea of trying to squeeze myself through a crack in the wall. Ever think of that?”
Alex shakes his head, tickling Darwin’s cheek with his hair. “Fine.” He holds his breath for a couple of seconds, like there’s something on the tip of his tongue that he isn’t sure he should let out. Then, “Hey, Darwin?” he says in a soft rush. “Does anything actually scare you?”
That isn’t a bad question, just a difficult one to answer. Darwin tips his head back and stares at the rough ceiling of their prison. Yes, he thinks. He’s afraid of being lost again, like he was after Sebastian Shaw turned Alex’s power against him. He’s afraid he’ll just go on adapting and surviving while his new family dies one member at a time. Afraid might be the wrong word, but he worries about some of the things that are happening outside Professor X’s Westchester mansion, things that concern him because he isn’t just a mutant.
But none of that is going to help Alex feel any better, and that’s his chief concern right now. So he says, “Spiders. I really hate spiders.”
Alex snorts. “Seriously?”
“Seriously,” Darwin says.
“So, if I mentioned the fact that there’s a spider crawling up your leg right now, you’d-”
“Smack you upside the head, ‘cause I know you’re lying.”
Alex laughs, a warm, fresh sound in that tomblike space. “Thanks, man. I still feel like an idiot, but - thanks.”
As if there was ever a choice. As if leaving Alex behind in the cold and dark, even for an hour or two, was ever really an option. Unlike his father, Darwin doesn’t walk out on people who need him. Certainly not on this person, who fought for him and believed in him, even when he was little more than ashes on the wind.
Remembering that time and how lost he felt, Darwin thinks he understands Alex’s fear a little better. He catches his hand again and lifts it to his own cheek. Then he stands perfectly still while Alex’s blunt fingertips fumble over his face, tracing the slope of his nose, then his lips and chin. He lets Alex initiate the kiss.
Their friends will find them, Darwin thinks. He knows that they will. Until then, he can do this much for Alex. He can be here with him and let him take what he needs.
08/26/2011
Fandom: X-Men: First Class
Rating: teen (language)
Pairing(s): Darwin/Havok
Notes: 2,570 words. I borrowed the villain from the comics canon, but you should be fine if you're only familiar with the films. Many thanks to sail_aweigh for looking this over.
Summary: A fight with a mysterious new mutant goes badly, and Darwin and Havok end up trapped underground. Darwin adapts easily, but the complete darkness triggers one of Havok's unpleasant childhood memories and leaves him feeling rather helpless.
Darwin opens his eyes and raises his head slowly. The last thing he remembers is Alex’s warning shout as the floor heaved and then split beneath their feet. He glances around warily. They must have fallen into some sort of cave, possibly an abandoned mineshaft. The walls are rough and high. When Darwin inhales, cold dank air fills his lungs and seems to settle there. He can tell that it’s pitch black, but he can see just fine thanks to his mutation.
With a groan, he rolls onto his side, then pushes himself unsteadily to his feet, brushes himself off, and starts to look for Alex.
Darwin finds him easily enough. He’s curled in a ball a few yards away. There’s dust in his hair and scratches on his face, but he doesn’t appear to have suffered any serious injuries. He is, however, trembling visibly, and his eyes are huge and black like they’re straining to drink in light that simply isn’t there.
Darwin kneels in front of him. “Alex,” he says gently.
At the sound of his voice, Alex jerks his head and squints, though he clearly can’t see anything. “Darwin?” His voice is uncharacteristically high and thin, his breaths quick and shallow. He must be on the verge of panic.
“I’m right here,” Darwin assures him quickly. “Right in front of you.”
“I can’t see you.”
“I know.” He lifts a hand toward Alex’s face, then pauses. “I’m gonna touch you, okay? Don’t freak out. It’s just me.”
Alex swallows and nods.
Darwin cups his cheek, tilting his head back slightly so that they’re eye to eye. He sweeps the pad of his thumb across the bony ridge under Alex’s eye, wiping away dust and what he suspects might be a tear streak. “It’s okay,” he says.
Alex grabs his wrist and holds on tight.
“Are you hurt?” Darwin asks.
Alex shakes his head.
“You sure?”
“Yeah. I just … I dunno.”
“Don’t like the dark?”
“No.”
Darwin frowns. Alex’s response was suspiciously emphatic. Before he can decide how best to phrase his question Alex says, “When I was little, like five or six, I stayed with this woman for a couple of months. When I was bad, she locked me in her linen closet. Just for an hour, maybe two. It was really dark.”
Darwin’s stomach clenches. His father walked out when he was four, and his mother thought his mutation was some sort of punishment. God’s retribution for marrying a man her parents didn’t like, or skipping church too often, or whatever sin she thought she’d committed. But she mostly ignored Darwin; she never hit him or sent him to his room without supper, or even yelled at him much. He spent most of his time playing quietly in his room anyway.
He wonders what Alex means by bad. Now isn’t the time to ask, though. They need to find a way out of here. He strokes Alex’s cheek again. “That was a long time ago. Long ago, before we were superheroes.” That’s a nice way to think about the past, he supposes. Before we were superheroes. Another lifetime, in other words.
Alex licks his lips, grimacing when he inadvertently swallows dust. “I used to try to pretend my brother Scott was there too, and we were hiding out from mobsters or aliens or something. It sort of helped. Okay, not really. But it stopped me from just blowing the whole place up.” He laughs shakily, but he sounds a little bit more like himself.
“Come on,” Darwin says, starting to rise. “If there was a way in, there’s gotta be a way out. We just have to find it. Then you can blast your way through it.”
Alex looks doubtful, but he doesn’t resist when Darwin tugs him to his feet. Because he can’t see, he stumbles, flailing instinctively with his free hand. Darwin catches him before he can send them crashing back to the floor, gripping his biceps and holding him steady.
“This is so stupid,” Alex groans. “Vulcan’s long gone by now. The professor’s gonna go ape.”
“The professor’s gonna be glad Vulcan didn’t kill us. At least now we know he isn’t working with Magneto.”
“I guess.”
“It’s something. C’mon.”
Alex sighs and looks at him. He seems to be able to guess where Darwin’s face is, though he can’t quite find his eyes. There’s something kind of comical about the way his gaze darts from Darwin’s chin to his forehead to his ear. Laughing at him would be mean, though, so Darwin bites his lip.
“What?” Alex says.
“Nothing.”
“No, really-”
Partly to forestall any more questions and partly because he just really wants to right now, Darwin says, “I’m gonna kiss you. Okay?”
Alex raises his eyebrows. “You don’t have to ask.”
“Don’t want it to seem like it’s coming out of nowhere.” He lets go of Alex’s hand so he can cup his cheek again. Shifting their positions slightly while being careful not to unbalance Alex, Darwin brings their mouths together.
As he’d half-suspected, Alex’s confidence comes surging back immediately. He leans into the kiss, tilting his head for a better angle, his hands finding Darwin’s hips instinctively. He opens his mouth, but Darwin is determined to keep things light - there’ll be plenty of time for more when they get the hell out of here - so he just teases at Alex’s lips with the tip of his tongue, eliciting first a chuckle and then a whine of frustration.
“Don’t wanna lose track,” Darwin murmurs.
“I do.”
Darwin kisses a corner of his mouth. Then, because he really can’t resist that pout, even when the supervillain is escaping and they’re buried who-knows-how-many feet below the ground, he pushes his tongue between Alex’s lips, probing deeply for a languid moment or two, before pulling back.
“Fuck,” Alex gasps.
“When we’re out of here,” Darwin promises. “Which will be soon. Just hold on to me.”
“Yeah, okay.” Alex fumbles for Darwin’s hand, finds it, and grips it tightly. “Can you see anything? Any kind of exit?”
Once again, Darwin scans the high, rough walls of their prison. “Not a damn thing.”
“Well, we got here from somewhere.”
“I know.” Reluctantly, he says, “I could try climbing the walls, see if there’s anything. I’d have to leave you alone down here, though.”
Alex is silent for a moment. His grip on Darwin’s hand tightens. Then he says, “Do it. I’ll be fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah.” He doesn’t sound sure, but he nods vigorously. “Yeah, I … just … gimme updates, you know? Don’t be too quiet. Okay? And, uh, don’t just look for holes in the wall. Feel for air currents and, uh, listen for, you know, running water. I read a lot of Hardy Boys,” he explains, even though he can’t possibly see the amused look on Darwin’s face.
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
There’s a pause.
“Hey, Alex? You gotta let go of my hand.”
“Oh, yeah.” Alex takes a long, shaky breath, then releases him.
“Hey,” Darwin says. “It’s gonna be okay. Just sit tight. You don’t have to pretend anything; I’m not leaving you here.”
“I know. Hey, you better get going. The sooner you do, the sooner we’re out of here, right?”
“Right.” Darwin toes off his boots and socks and walks to one of the cave walls. When he touches it with his palm, nothing happens. Undiscouraged, he lifts his foot and sets it against the wall. Still nothing. Biting his lip, he claws at the wall, scrabbling for purchase, and that’s when his body figures out what it needs to do. His fingers and toes become longer and more flexible, their pores excreting an adhesive substance that allows him to scramble froglike up the wall.
Groovy, he thinks. To Alex, he says, “I’m about eight feet up now. Just hold tight.”
“I’m holding tight.”
Darwin doesn’t like the quaver in his voice, but there’s nothing he can do about it now. He concentrates on climbing. After he’s gone a few more yards, he hears Alex say, “Hey - Darwin? Don’t tell anyone what a total fucking coward I was, okay? Especially not Hank.”
Darwin’s a little surprised that Alex even thinks he has to ask, but he doesn’t say that. “You’re not a coward.”
“Yeah, okay.”
“So,” Darwin says in as conversational a tone as he can manage while climbing, “the Hardy Boys, huh?”
“Half the foster homes I stayed in had them.”
“Hey, no need to sound so defensive. I’m not judging. I just don’t think I’ve ever seen you read anything besides…” He was going to say comic books, but that does sound kind of judgmental.
“I’m not a nerd,” Alex huffs. “What is this, a book club?”
Darwin snorts. Alex is getting pretty testy down there. He’d better hurry.
Fortunately, he thinks he’s getting somewhere. For the past few minutes, he’s been aware of the fact that the cave wall does not go straight up, but in fact slopes at about a sixty-degree angle. He wonders if they slid down this way after Vulcan destroyed the floor … and that’s when he feels the breeze, like the brush of a feather across his seeking fingertips.
He freezes.
“Alex?” he calls.
“Yeah?”
“Think I found something.” Clinging to the wall with one hand and both feet, Darwin stretches his free arm upward. He doesn’t feel anything, no fissures in the rock. And yet, he’s sure the breeze was real. He didn’t imagine it.
“What is it?” Alex asks. “What did you find?”
“Not sure. Hang on.”
“Okay,” Alex mutters. “Okay, okay…”
Damn. His voice is getting breathy and high-pitched again. Darwin gropes along the wall, feeling with his elongated fingers. Come on, he thinks. Come on, there has to be…
And there it is.
His heart sinks.
Modulating his tone carefully, Darwin says, “I’m coming back down. Don’t move. I’m gonna land…” He glances over his shoulder, gaging the distance. “…About four feet to your left.”
Darwin springs. As he plummets, he feels his bones becoming lighter, the cave air filling his embrace. He lands in a crouch, on the balls of his feet, with barely a sound.
Alex spins in his direction. “Is that-”
“It’s me.” Darwin rises quickly and catches one of Alex’s hands. By now, his fingers and toes have reverted to their normal length. “We have a problem.”
“Oh, great. Because our lives were getting so boring lately.”
Darwin gives his hand a squeeze, noting that his palm is cold and slightly clammy. “I found an opening,” he says in a calm, measured tone. “It’s too small to fit through. And if you try to blast it open, I think the cave might collapse.”
Alex frowns. “So, then how did we-”
“There might be another exit. I didn’t see anything else, but… Or Vulcan might have sealed things off after we fell. I don’t know. It isn’t hopeless, though,” he continues hurriedly, as Alex’s hand is starting to tremble. “Professor X and the others know where we were headed. When they don’t hear from us, they’ll start looking. The professor can use Cerebro to find us. Hank and Sean can figure out how to get us out of here. It’ll be a while, but it’ll be okay. Alex? What?”
Alex is shaking his head. His eyes are wide and pale; they seem to be drinking up the darkness. “You go,” he says. “Get help. I’ll wait here.”
“Don’t be stupid.”
“I’m not being stupid. You could squeeze through, right? You could adapt. You should go. It could be hours before anyone even thinks about looking for us. What are we supposed to do? Just sit here and wait? That’s fucking stupid.” He’s trying to sound angry, but he’s shaking hard now. He jerks his hand out of Darwin’s grip and shouts, “I chose solitary, remember? I don’t need a fucking babysitter!”
“Nobody said-”
“Just go!”
Alex lunges at Darwin - probably to shove him away - but he misses and stumbles. Darwin catches him by the shoulders and lets Alex take one more half-hearted swing before folding him in his arms and holding his shuddering body close. “I’m not leaving you,” he whispers, his lips brushing the shell of Alex’s ear.
“What if nobody comes to get us?”
“Somebody will come. The professor will send somebody. It might take him a while, but he isn’t the kind of person who just gives up on people. I’m not leaving you alone in the dark. Don’t make me say it again.”
For what seems like a long time, Alex stands there stiffly in his embrace, his heart hammering between their bodies. Then gradually, almost muscle-by-muscle, he starts to relax. He lets slip a tired-sounding sigh and turns his head so that it tucks neatly against the curve of Darwin’s neck.
“Feel like such a panty waist,” he mutters. “Don’t tell anyone.”
“Not telling a soul,” Darwin promises. “And hey, maybe I just don’t like the idea of trying to squeeze myself through a crack in the wall. Ever think of that?”
Alex shakes his head, tickling Darwin’s cheek with his hair. “Fine.” He holds his breath for a couple of seconds, like there’s something on the tip of his tongue that he isn’t sure he should let out. Then, “Hey, Darwin?” he says in a soft rush. “Does anything actually scare you?”
That isn’t a bad question, just a difficult one to answer. Darwin tips his head back and stares at the rough ceiling of their prison. Yes, he thinks. He’s afraid of being lost again, like he was after Sebastian Shaw turned Alex’s power against him. He’s afraid he’ll just go on adapting and surviving while his new family dies one member at a time. Afraid might be the wrong word, but he worries about some of the things that are happening outside Professor X’s Westchester mansion, things that concern him because he isn’t just a mutant.
But none of that is going to help Alex feel any better, and that’s his chief concern right now. So he says, “Spiders. I really hate spiders.”
Alex snorts. “Seriously?”
“Seriously,” Darwin says.
“So, if I mentioned the fact that there’s a spider crawling up your leg right now, you’d-”
“Smack you upside the head, ‘cause I know you’re lying.”
Alex laughs, a warm, fresh sound in that tomblike space. “Thanks, man. I still feel like an idiot, but - thanks.”
As if there was ever a choice. As if leaving Alex behind in the cold and dark, even for an hour or two, was ever really an option. Unlike his father, Darwin doesn’t walk out on people who need him. Certainly not on this person, who fought for him and believed in him, even when he was little more than ashes on the wind.
Remembering that time and how lost he felt, Darwin thinks he understands Alex’s fear a little better. He catches his hand again and lifts it to his own cheek. Then he stands perfectly still while Alex’s blunt fingertips fumble over his face, tracing the slope of his nose, then his lips and chin. He lets Alex initiate the kiss.
Their friends will find them, Darwin thinks. He knows that they will. Until then, he can do this much for Alex. He can be here with him and let him take what he needs.
08/26/2011