Score One For Me!
Sage is a loud kid. He laughs loud, yells loud, plays loud, talks loud. He likes to roar and hiss and snarl and growl. We've had many talks about letting people know that he is playing or pretending before he starts to make these noises. He also has to ask permission from other children to "play monsters or dinosaurs" before he can get in their faces. He's pretty good about it, at this point. I've learned how to pick my battles with him and only lay down the law when he's doing something that I consider inappropriate. We've had some serious battles over TV and movies, though. Since he was very little, he's wanted to watch Spiderman, Batman, Star Wars; anything with violence entirely unsuitable for his age. I made the mistake of letting him watch Star Wars Episode 1 when he was younger, and it was a horrible idea. He would act the violence out, which would often involve me getting whacked with something. He had a hard enough time playing appropriately back then, but the added violence made him almost unbearable to be around.
Now that he's five, I've started letting both he and Mae watch Pokemon and Disney movies. On Mondays when he doesn't have school, I let him watch movies like The Goonies, Labyrinth, E.T., or Iron Giant while Mae is napping. He is starting to show me that he understands the difference between the "good guys" and the "bad guys," and is aware that I do not think it is appropriate to play like the "bad guys." He is also showing me that he understands that in the real world, "bad guys" do not exist. There are people who started out as babies and, for various reasons, have learned to repeatedly make bad choices in their lives. He is also beginning to understand that "bad guys" can redeem themselves by making a good choice. I still don't let him watch superhero movies or cartoons because I think he is still too young and impressionable. The violence also makes me uncomfortable and I've made that clear to him. He knows that he will be able to watch these things when he is older and has made his peace with it. I have also decided that I will allow him to watch these things when I think he can understand it as a source of entertainment and not a reflection on the real world around him.
Anyway, today we had this conversation:
"Mom, my friend Chase really likes Star Wars!"
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, he watches it all the time."
"As much as you watch Pokemon?"
"Yeah. (pause) But I don't like Star Wars. It's too violent."
"What does 'violent' mean?" (I tend to ask him that question as if I don't know, to see if he really knows.)
"It means when there is too much fighting. I don't like fighting very much."
"Oh, well that's good. Neither do I."
(pause) "I like Pokemon best."
Yay! Yay yay yay yay yay. Even if he doesn't fully mean it, I feel like I've won a small battle.
Now that he's five, I've started letting both he and Mae watch Pokemon and Disney movies. On Mondays when he doesn't have school, I let him watch movies like The Goonies, Labyrinth, E.T., or Iron Giant while Mae is napping. He is starting to show me that he understands the difference between the "good guys" and the "bad guys," and is aware that I do not think it is appropriate to play like the "bad guys." He is also showing me that he understands that in the real world, "bad guys" do not exist. There are people who started out as babies and, for various reasons, have learned to repeatedly make bad choices in their lives. He is also beginning to understand that "bad guys" can redeem themselves by making a good choice. I still don't let him watch superhero movies or cartoons because I think he is still too young and impressionable. The violence also makes me uncomfortable and I've made that clear to him. He knows that he will be able to watch these things when he is older and has made his peace with it. I have also decided that I will allow him to watch these things when I think he can understand it as a source of entertainment and not a reflection on the real world around him.
Anyway, today we had this conversation:
"Mom, my friend Chase really likes Star Wars!"
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, he watches it all the time."
"As much as you watch Pokemon?"
"Yeah. (pause) But I don't like Star Wars. It's too violent."
"What does 'violent' mean?" (I tend to ask him that question as if I don't know, to see if he really knows.)
"It means when there is too much fighting. I don't like fighting very much."
"Oh, well that's good. Neither do I."
(pause) "I like Pokemon best."
Yay! Yay yay yay yay yay. Even if he doesn't fully mean it, I feel like I've won a small battle.