(no subject)
WHY is this so difficult! Why can't I live my life like any normal human being-- act this way or eat this without gaining weight... I am a horribly fat slob and can't seem to get going in the right direction. I hate myself and I hate the way I look. Beautiful and attractive are two words that I haven't felt that I resemble since maybe... MAYBE I was 2. I can't stand myself, the way I look... I am determined to lose weight, even if it kills me.
I started a 24 hour fast a little while ago... it will have to end after I see Wicked tomorrow with my grandma, because she's my grandma and that's our relationship... plays and out to dinner... I have to order and pick at something-- unless I want to be force fed cookies and cakes from her kitchen... HELL NO! I went to the gym twice today.... I lost a freakin' single pound from yesterday at 5 pm to this morning at 8 am... and managed to lose NOTHING else when I went back this afternoon after work.
I'm just in a runt... sorry if I seem like a big (literally and figuratively) bitch... I'm not usually one to complain about anything but myself... so there's nothing else to worry about.
Think thin.
I started a 24 hour fast a little while ago... it will have to end after I see Wicked tomorrow with my grandma, because she's my grandma and that's our relationship... plays and out to dinner... I have to order and pick at something-- unless I want to be force fed cookies and cakes from her kitchen... HELL NO! I went to the gym twice today.... I lost a freakin' single pound from yesterday at 5 pm to this morning at 8 am... and managed to lose NOTHING else when I went back this afternoon after work.
I'm just in a runt... sorry if I seem like a big (literally and figuratively) bitch... I'm not usually one to complain about anything but myself... so there's nothing else to worry about.
Think thin.