entry 067 - all summer long [4/14]
Title: All Summer Long
Author: jamie_love13
Beta-Edited: Madison, but not for these coming chapters.
Pairings/Characters: Jared/Jensen, Mentions of Jensen/Jeff, Chad/Kenzie, +others
Word Count: 6,000 Words
Rating: NC-17
Summary: The tension between the group is high, especially when Jeff decides to attack Jared.
Disclaimer: Definitely don't own.
Warnings: Heterosex, mentions of more sex.
Notes: Here's Chapter 4. Hope y'all enjoy! Chapter 5 coming up!
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He’s currently sitting at one of the tables with Danneel and Sophia, enjoying himself for the first time in the week and a half that they’ve been stuck in this damn cabin with Jensen. Him and Danneel had been trying to cheer up Sophia, who had been starting to get worried about Chad and his wandering eyes and hands. Currently though, all three of them were completely happy, especially since Danneel had done her famous impression of Bush. Jared could feel the heat on his cheeks and just revelled in the moment, glad to finally be feeling something that he hasn’t felt in such a long time, not even with Tom. His smile fades a little at that and before he can shake his head and get his smile back on his face, no matter how forced it would be, he hears Mike come up behind him.
“Get that smile on for real, Jared, cause we’re having a party!” Jared looks behind him and lets out a grin, knowing the he could really use a party right now. He shakes his head at his friend and smirks towards Danneel and Sophia, before turning back to Mike.
“And how, oh glorious Mike, are we going to have a party with only a bunch of us?” Jared replies, his grin reforming and his eyes twinkling. Jared definitely feels the need to get completely wasted and knows that Sophia and Danneel have the same sentiments that he does. They all need to let loose, get so completely wasted and forget the tensions of the past week and a half. It will all do them good.
Mike grins one more time before he sits next to them all, and folds his hands on the table -“Simple, Chris and Steve have a gig right now. We all know that after their awesome gigs, they hold parties. And voila, we will have a party!” Mike finishes before looking at everyone. Jared feels kind of shocked. Had he been so stuck up in his own problems to forget that some of his best friends had a gig that they were looking forward to so much was tonight? Groaning, he slams his head down onto the table and flips Mike off when he realizes that the other friend is laughing.
“Basically, Genevieve, Sandra and their weird friend Misha is at the gig, filming and getting high.” Mike says, smirking at Jared’s snort when he mentions Misha. Misha Collins is definitely a weird guy, always high off of life and ready to help anyone who needs it. Jared doesn’t know how the lot of them know the guy, they just know that they make their life a hell of a lot more fun.
“So, basically, we’re going to be splitting off into teams and going to do a few things. Jared, you’re going to go with me and Danneel and buy the party decorations while Sophia, Jensen and Jeff will be here, setting up the house by moving all the furniture out of the way. When we come back, Jared’ll switch places with Sophia and help pin the decorations we bought up around the house.” Jared freezes at that, as does everyone else, except Mike, who doesn’t seem to catch the problem and just keeps going on. Jared can feel his heartbeat pick up, and everyone else’s eyes on him, wondering what he’ll be doing, stuck with Jensen and his new boyfriend, if he’ll pull out and have another breakdown. Jared takes a deep gulp, lets the fresh air fill his lungs and expand them before interrupting Mike, who stops talking completely, and looks absolutely confused.
“What, Jay?” He says exasperated, rolling his eyes good naturedly, wondering why he was stopped when he was in prime explanation mode with this party. Jared recognizes that fact that Mike realizes that everyone’s eyes are on them, especially Jared, and are wide and shocked.
“What did I do?” Mike laughs, looking around at everyone and wondering why they open their mouths in shock.
“Mike, seriously, think about what you’ve been saying.” That’s Chad, good old Chad, who had just appeared out of nowhere with Kenzie looking tousled and red. After glancing at Sophia, he can tell that Sophia has no idea what to be pissed about and Mike tries hard not to roll his eyes in annoyance at Chad. Mike looks over at everyone, bites his lip and Jared has to laugh at that but honestly can’t take it anymore.
“Guys, it’ll be fine. I’ll just... ignore them both, get everything done really quickly and then leave them to fuck each other like I’m not there... like the usual.” He says, sighing and biting his lip and getting up, grabbing the keys to his van.
“Dude, no, as your best friend, I’m not going to let you go through that kind of fucking pain again.” Chad says, pulling his arms across his chest and nudging Sophia with his hip, knowing that something is wrong with her and not sure how to fix it.
“Leave me alone, Chad.” She snaps and walks to the other side of Danneel, causing Jared to snort.
“Chad, no offense, but as your best friend, I suggest you learn how you’re hurting the most perfect girl out there for you, before trying to protect my feelings.” Jared states while shrugging his shoulders and arching his eyebrow. Chad sighs before running his hand through his hair and letting a glare come out.
“I’m just saying Jared, the dude put you into the fucking hospital because of what he did. There’s no way I’m going to let you stay in the same room with the two of them, pretending to be okay when all you’re really doing is screaming on the inside.” Jared sighs before looking down at the ground, knowing his best friend is right.
“Alright, a compromise then. You stay with me during that time.” Chad nods and everyone walks to the car to pick up the decorations.
“Shit, dude, fuck, I’m so sorry.” Mike says as the guys and Danneel drive to the party store, biting his lip and slamming his head down on the dash of the car.
“Dude, stop that, I don’t want you losing the rest of your ten brain cells by doing that,” Jared chuckles and watches as Mike sighs and does indeed stop.
“Yeah, but you have no idea how bad I’ve been feeling since realizing that I paired you up to put decorations up with them.” Mike replies, biting his lip and opening his eyes wide and misty-like. Jared sighs before patting his friends bald head, laughing as he feels lotion on the top.
“You missed a spot, dude.” He says, rubbing his hand on Mike’s leg. Mike snorts at that before looking at Jared one more time.
“Dude, it’s ok. I’ll deal somehow, and with Chad there, nothing will get too out of hand.” He replies and when he hears Danneel snort from behind him he has to shrug and laugh.
“Okay, so I’ll have to be careful in case Chad get’s too out of hand with vocalizing his thoughts about Jensen and... his guy, but other than that, things should be fine, you guys.” Jared looks through the rear-view mirror and can see Danneel looking at him and he sighs.
“Seriously, Danneel, everything will be fine,” He says and when she nods her head lightly, he knows that she’s done talking about it - for now. He pulls in across from the grocery store and into the parking lot of the party decoration store - why they don’t just keep everything together in a small town like this, he has no clue - and shuts off his car. The group of them get out of the car and head towards the store doors.
“Mike, is there another list,” Jared questions, humour indicated in his voice and Mike looks over at him and sticks his tongue out.
“Fuck you Jay, my lists make a chick orgasm.” Jared laughs at that before quickly hitting Mike in the hand and collecting the list from his other hand. He quickly skims the list and smirks, looking up at Mike.
“Dude, you forgot one important fucking thing,”
“What?” Mike says and Danneel laughs when she looks over Jared’s tall ass body and sees what he means.
“You forgot the fuckin’ condoms, idiot!” He shouts, causing people to stare at him and some of the older women look at them in disgust. He can’t help but laugh and ignore them before turning back to Mike and grinning. Mike grins back and they continue throughout the store, collecting items that are on the list and a few miscellaneous items that aren’t on the list but the three of them remembered. A good half hour later, the three of them are in the checkout line, ringing their items through and putting them in bags, then making their way to the car and cabin.
And as they do, Jared feels dreadful.
Everything is tense, what with Chad next to Jared’s left side, glaring daggers at Jensen and Jeff, who are on his right side, a little ways off, glaring right back at Chad. Jared sighs before biting his lip and panning over to where Jensen and Jeff are.
He can feel an ache in his chest when he looks over at them, and whenever he sees Jeff brush a hand against Jensen, his heart just turns completely cold, nearly shattering with the weight of missing his ex-boyfriend. It’s during this time that Jared definitely recognizes the fact that getting drunk tonight would be the best plan for him, especially since being in the same cabin as Jensen, let alone the same room as him, for the first time in a year, is killing him. He lets out a breath and continues working on trying to pin the banner up saying Welcome to the Party correctly. It’s a hard thing to do though, with everyone glaring at everyone else.
“Chad, stop it and help me.” He says, glaring his own set of daggers at his best friend, trying to get his attention. It takes a few minutes but soon enough, Chad nods his head and takes his eyes away from the other two guys and helps Jared pin the banner. The tension in the room is thick enough to cut and Jared doesn’t know how he’s going to be able to get through this one last thing. He was able to pull the decoration set up quite clearly and quickly, ignoring his ex-boyfriend and then some. However, after a good hour of being in the same room as him, things started getting more tense, especially when Jeff started getting more handsy and Chad started baring his teeth.
“Because Chad’s your bitch.” Jared freezes at that, not wanting to turn around and glare at Jeff for saying such a thing but fuck if that wasn’t uncalled for. Chad, however, has no qualms about calling the bastard out.
“No, I’m not Jared’s bitch. How about you go fuck some pretty chick like you’ve been doing all week instead of causing my boy pain!” Chad growls and Jared tenses even more than before. He’s had his suspicions that Jeff had been cheating on Jensen throughout the week with Sandy, but Jared never knew how to feel about that - what goes around comes around and all that shit - but Jared would never want to have Jensen have that much pain put onto him.
“Hey, before you go making assumptions about my boyfriend, how about you fix things with your girlfriend!” That’s Jensen, and there’s anger and protection and love in his voice that just makes Jared even angrier than he’s ever been, because how does Jensen not fucking see what an asshole Jeff truly is?
“And how about before you go judging Chad like he’s still your friend, you recognize the fact that your boyfriends a cheap slut who’ll get his kicks off of anything!” Jared snaps, sick and tired and all of the tension that’s been thrumming through his body releasing itself into him and coming out for the first time in twelve months.
“How about you shut the fuck up Jay about shit you don’t know!” Jensen shouts, his fists clenching in anger. Jared clenches his own fists in anger and steps closer.
“How about you not fucking call me Jay, since you lost that will when you fucking cheated on me on our anniversary.” He shouts back, everyone that’s around coming closer to listen and break up anything that might begin to happen. Jared can feel the power of the shout thrumming through him, wanting to get all of this fucking shit out of him for the first time, and to the shock of everyone else, he continues his yelling.
“And how about you get the damn stick out of your ass and realize what goes around, comes around, that your precious boyfriend has been cheating on you and that you need to fucking stop being such an asshole because just being near you makes me want to do some drastic shit that I haven’t done since you fucking left me. And while we’re at it, how about you fucking apologize for fucking leaving me for the guy you fucking cheated on me with, and how about you apologize to everyone else for putting them in the middle, because no one deserved that, especially not them. Lastly, why don’t you just fucking leave, because it’s obvious that you don’t want to be here, near me, the poor little puppy that fell completely in love with you just so you could hurt him like you never fucking cared,” Jared finishes, panting heavily and tears making his eyes blurry. His fists are clenched so badly that he can feel rivulets of blood streaming down his palms and dripping onto the ground, a steady drip, drip, drip. Everyone around him is looking at him with wide eyes, shocked and Jared can’t help but a feel a little wrecked at that. He’s done so much since Jensen left him but not once did he ever admit out loud what he wanted to. He never admitted what it was that Jensen had done to him that made him so mad, so hurt and heartbroken, even though everyone had known. Not only that, but Jared had never admitted, not once, just how he felt about that, or what he felt about Jensen and god damn fucking Jeff being in the same place as him, and he’s panting heavily and the tears are coming down and all he can think of is the fact that Jensen and Jeff are probably just going to leave so they can laugh at him some more. He sees a movement out of his eye and notices Danneel and Sophia come up to his sides, and pulling him away.
“Come on Jay, let’s go.” Jared only sees Jensen, though, looking completely shocked and pale skinned.
Everything is loud, boisterous. There only an hour into the party, but it is completely going to be one of the best Mike’s ever thrown. There are people everywhere, some having arrived already completely plastered - see: Chris and Steve, but that’s the usual after a gig that they rocked at - and even more so, a lot more people were high, which not a lot of people really liked but didn’t really give a shit about once they were drunk. The most shocking thing though was the fact that somewhere in Mike’s house, somewhere dark and danky, hopeful to god not in one of the basement bedrooms, there were honest to god drugs being used. Everyone looked the other way when it came to those people doing the crazy shit, but if something else was going on with those drugs, then that’s when everyone would do some kicking out. In the main area of the cabin, things are tightly packed even though the couch has been plasticized and moved to the very far wall, near the patio/porch doors. The floor is full of people dancing - or, well, almost like fucking standing up. If you look closely, you will find Sophia in the middle of that throng, dancing with Danneel, a drink in her left hand and Danneel’s hand on her hip. Sophia’s head is thrown back in laughter, her eyes wide and open, staring at Danneel and Danneel smiling back, blushing. If you look even harder, you will find Chad making out with Kenzie. They’re against another wall, close to the stairs and he has his hands underneath Kenzie’s top, skimming over her abs and causing her to giggle. If you put the two circumstances together, you would think that Sophia is drunkenly staring at Danneel with lust and possibly love her in her eyes because of Chad except at this moment, Chad isn’t even on Sophia’s mind, nor does Sophia want him to be. In the kitchen, Jared’s drinking shot for shot, staring rapidly at Tom and Mike, who are in a corner together, laughing. Jared’s not jealous, no, because earlier in the week he had told Tom, had told him that he lied, that Tom probably wasn’t the one who could fix Jared, and Tom had been cool with that, had even said he might have feelings for someone else. Now, looking at Tom and Mike, Jared could tell just who Tom might have feelings for and he couldn’t help but grin at that thought. He just truly hoped nothing happened between the two of them because well, Tom and Jared aren’t exactly separated just yet. Somewhere else in the kitchen is Jensen, staring rapidly at Jared, drinking even more than he is and pissed off to all hell. Jensen, good old Jensen is completely upset that Jared had told him those things earlier, had the nerve to go and say anything like that to him when Jared was in the wrong. And Jensen wanted to cause some trouble.
Everything is feverous, Chad’s hands are everywhere and he can feel the pressure of Kenzie against his body, causing his dick to harden just slightly. He knows he shouldn’t be doing this, knows he should be downstairs with his girlfriend, telling her how sorry he is but god damn, he just can’t. There’s something about Kenzie, something that’s been making him chase her these whole near two weeks. He puts more pressure into the kiss, starts chasing Kenzie’s tongue and squeezing her breast, making a small moan come out of her mouth, causing Chad to grin in appreciation. God, there’s something about her that get’s to Chad. He pushes her back into another wall now that they’re no longer on the stairs - and damn if that’s a dangerous feat - and see’s her bedroom in the vicinity. While they haven’t truly slept together yet, they’ve definitely made out previously and have definitely gotten close to sleeping together, but it’s been enough that Chad recognizes the door immediately. He opens the door, sliding the two of them into the bedroom before anyone recognized them, recognized the fact that Chad was cheating on his current girlfriend - and he did feel guilty, he did! - and recognized the fact that Chad wasn’t being the best friend he should be, by showing a trait that Jared had begun to hate since Jensen, but Chad wasn’t exactly thinking about Jared right now.
The two of them are on the bed now, with Chad taking of Kenzie’s top and moaning in pleasure when he realizes that she had gone top commando, and damn if that isn’t hot. He latches onto one of her breasts with his mouth, fumbling with his pants while he does so and while she fumbles with his, the need to have sex stronger than ever. When they finally get all of their clothing off, Chad takes a break to look at Kenzie and is absolutely stunned into silence at her beauty. He doesn’t feel guilty, he really doesn’t but this girl is so beautiful, so young and she makes him feel something he hasn’t felt since when he first met Sophia. He grins before going down and kissing Kenzie slowly, with all the love he feels inside him, pouring out into the kiss and into Kenzie’s soul. She kisses him back and it’s then that Chad enters into Kenzie, slowly, not wanting to hurt her for their first time. He moans at the contact, can feel it reverberate through the kiss and hardens whilst he’s inside the girl, causing her to moan. He begins thrusting slowly, building the pressure between the two of them into something definitely more.
“Faster, Chad.” Kenzie moans, running her fingers through his hair and Chad complies, starting to go a little faster, just enough speed and thrust to make Kenzie moan a little louder than before. Pretty soon, he can feel his build up coming and when Kenzie’s walls clench around him, he comes quickly before falling onto her.
The music is loud and boisterous, the bass thumping through the walls as Jensen looks around the living area from the couch he’s on. He’d kicked a couple making out on it off a good thirty minutes ago, waiting for Chris and Steve to get their asses onto the makeshift stage and play a song that they recently wrote. Jensen’s excited to hear it, promises made to him that the song would kick ass and that he’d absolutely love it. He currently has a beer in his hand, condensation running down the bottle and landing on the edges of his hand. It’s cool enough that it keeps Jensen nice and cool. When he finally hears cheers from the crowd, he arches and turns his body, finally seeing Chris and Steve making their way to the stage, causing Jensen to grin in excitement. Jensen takes another gulp of his beer, finding it empty and sighing. He can hear the endnotes of the beginning lyrics and quickly, Jensen realizes he should probably go and find himself another drink, before he sobers up and gets to be one of those guys that is no fun at a party. He looks up at Chris and Steve, quickly nodding a hello to them and begins to leave the room, his hands held high above his head, making him able to move more swiftly through the room. He spots a few of his friends here and there, drinks in their hands and notices Chad and Kenzie coming down the stairs before he quickly turns his head away. If there was one thing Jensen never understood, it was the fact that Chad always had his wandering eyes, even though he had a great woman next to his side, constantly. It was definitely the one thing that Jensen judged him about, though, if anyone else were to hear him say that, they’d give him a pointed look and make him feel even shittier about himself. Sighing, and deciding he really needed that fucking drink and fast, he rushes over to the kitchen area, deciding to fuck beer and go for something harder.
However, once he arrives into the kitchen he stops quickly at the sight of Jared, holding a shot glass of tequila in his hand, grinning at whatever it is Danneel is saying. Jensen won’t lie, he misses Jared like he lost a limb, but he also misses Danneel, knows that he fucked up their friendship by hurting Jared and if he could have anything, it would be to have Danneel’s friendship back and Jared’s love. But he remembers what Jared had said to him earlier on, remembers how pissed off he had gotten and quickly brings that anger back up into his persona, his fists clenching and a smirk entering his face - a facade, and everyone knows it but right now, Jensen doesn’t give a shit. He walks over to Jared, grins, and takes his glass, drinking it quickly. It’s on.
Danneel isn’t an idiot, knows that Jared is fucking pining for Jensen, missing him as much as someone misses someone they’ve lost forever - which Jared thinks he has - knows Jensen is missing Jared just as much. At the same time though, she knows that Jensen is too much of a stubborn bastard to do anything about his hurt, his emotions for Jared and that it’s causing Jared even more pain. Knows that in order for Jensen to have the one discussion with Jared that everyone wants them to have, they have to both be incredible drunk and uncaring towards the fact that they’re anywhere near each other. At first, Danneel always thought that Jared wouldn’t mind being too close to Jensen here, even if it did cause him pain, but ever since his outburst a little while before the party, Danneel has no idea what to do with Jared. If she had known, truly fucking known how Jared had felt, she would’ve helped him in any she could have, and she knows that Sophia feels the same.
Quickly glancing over to her friend, Danneel can feel the heat spreading through her cheeks. She’s never admitted it, not even to Jared - though, she’s positive he knows - but she always had a crush on Sophia, and couldn’t help but wonder why she was with a guy like Chad, a guy who didn’t know just what he had, just what he was missing the fuck out on. She sighs before looking towards Jared and seeing Jensen appear with a smirk on his face, and the hair on the back of her neck raises. She doesn’t know what he’s getting at, but when he grabs Jared’s shot glass and drinks from it right away, she knows that he’s posing a challenge, that he’s angry enough to want a fight and quickly, looking over to Sophia, she can tell that the other woman saw the exact same thing and has the exact same thought. Without any preamble, the two girls head toward Jared and Jensen, ready to break anything that might happen apart, because they know, they fucking know that Jared’s in no mood for this and that he’s loose and drunk enough that if Jensen does something to provoke him, the proverbial shit will hit the fucking fan. When Danneel finally gets to Jared, she see’s that Sophia is already there, rubbing his arms and trying to calm him down while he glares at Jensen.
“Sophia, no. Let my arm go and pass me the fucking tequila.” He says with venom, glaring at Jensen who keeps smirking. Danneel is shocked at Jared’s voice in that sentence and takes a gulp of fresh air, watching as Jared pours the tequila Sophia gives him into two different shot glasses.
“First one to puke loses.” Jensen smirks, and Danneel can’t help but feel hesitant, especially when she realizes that many of their friends are watching, some getting ready to cheer on either Jensen or Jared.
“Jared, c’mon, don’t do this,” She begs, trying to take away his shot glasses but he stops her with a glare, which softens slightly.
“Gotta, Dani. Jensen needs to prove his damn manhood,” He laughs before starting to take drink after drink.
***
Sophia can only watch as Jared and Jensen match each other for shots of tequila drank, and she can’t help but feel hesitant. She bites her lip and looks around, trying to gauge and see who’s here and what they’re doing, just to make sure, in case a fight breaks out. She spots her boyfriend, his arm around Kenzie, whispering in her ear and stroking her arm slowly, which Sophia recognizes as his after-sex gesture and she can’t help but feel a little bit of anger and a little bit of resignation. She knows that their relationship is useless now, that he’ll just keep going to her and that hurts, because she knows she’s a great girl, knows she deserves better, but there’s always been something Chad that she couldn’t help but stay away from. Suddenly, he looks up and into her eyes and he starts to come towards her but she can’t take that, starts shaking her head, tears blurring her vision before she turns around and head towards Danneel and the problem with Jared.
When she does so, she realizes that the drinking is definitely slower, and the boys are definitely more drunk, if anything, by their slurring and unsteady movements. She bites her lip when she hears Jared ask a question and knows instantly that the night is only going to end heartbreak.
She hears him ask again, feels her heartbreak, and suddenly, he’s no longer quiet, no longer silent with his questions.
“Why, Jensen? Why’d you fucking do it?” He shouts, causing the attention of everyone in the kitchen around them to look their way.
Jared can feel the heat on his face, can feel the alcohol thrumming through his blood and he just wants to fucking have some answers, especially with why he’s still so god damn heartbroken, especially after a year of not being with Jensen.
“Just fucking tell me why Jensen. Why the fuck did you cheat on me, on our fucking anniversary?” He whimpers, ignoring everyone that’s around them right now - ignoring the fact that Danneel and Sophia want him to stop, the fact that Chad is looking at Jensen with anger in him and Chris and Steve is no longer singing, instead, watching the two of them fight. He has no clue where Jeff and Tom are, thank fucking god, doesn’t even know where Mike is, either. In the far corner, he can see Misha talking to Genevieve and Sandy, smoking a joint while discreetly trying to steal glances at them. He see’s Jensen look down, fiddle with his shot glass, making it twirl on its edge before he shrugs his shoulders.
“Don’t you dare fucking shrug this off like it’s nothing, Ackles. Fuckin ‘ tell me -“ Jared slurs, clutching the kitchen counter to stop himself from falling - “Just fuckin’ tell me why you cheated on me on such an important fucking day,” he nearly yells and he can hear Danneel say they should take this somewhere less private, hear Jensen agree, can see him walk away and damn if he’s going to let that bastard walk away right now. No way in hell is he going to let that happen.
“Hey!” He yells at Jensen, who’s already half way to the basement door. He can see Jensen stop in mid pause, and he won’t let the bastard walk away, not this time.
“Don’t fucking walk away either. I deserve, after a year of missing you, of wondering what the hell I did wrong, I fucking deserve to know why you felt me unworthy enough of you to cheat on me with a guy like fucking Jeff Morgan.” He shouts, his fists clenched and his breathing coming in short, rapt, pants.
“Jay - Jay, please don’t do this. Not up here, not in front of everyone. At least come downstairs with me so we can hash this out.” Jensen replies and he sounds so broken and Jared hates that because if anything, he’s the one that should be feeling broken, not fucking Jensen. He sighs, looks around and finally feels the stares of everyone’s eyes looking in at him, finding out exactly what was going on with him. He realizes then that he doesn’t want anyone other than his close friends knowing why he’s so fucked up, so he looks upwards and reluctantly, follows Jensen into the basement, slamming the door.
He rushes down the steps, stepping in close to Jensen and baring his teeth when Jensen turns around. He watches Jensen visibly deflate and nearly does so himself, but he’s too drunk and too tense to do so.
“Well, why?” He snarls, nearly punching the wall next to Jensen.
“I was scared, Jay. So fucking scared,” Jensen replies but he doesn’t stop, no way does he stop - “At first, I told myself I had no idea why I did such a thing, but I knew I was lying to myself, because after a week without you, I knew - I fucking realized how scared I was.” Jensen says, looking down at his shoes and biting his lip. Jared looks at him, confusion in his eyes and written all over his face.
“Why the hell would you be so scared Jensen. We were together for ten fucking years. TEN YEARS, JENSEN. Why would you get scared then?” He shouts, tears finally breaking through his eyes and rolling down his cheeks. He wipes them away furiously, stepping back from Jensen, needing to breathe in something fresh for once. He feels even tenser than before, and he’s fucking shaking, and damn if he’s never had that before. He turns away from Jensen and starts to pace before he spots a padded spot in the wall. Walking over to it, he swiftly punches that spot, causing his knuckles to crack open a smidge and bleed and the padding to break to the ground, just like his fucking heart is.
“Jay-“
“Don’t you fucking dare call me that Jensen.” He growls, not wanting to hear the love that name use to give to him. He leans down, sitting his ass on the cold basement ground and it takes him a moment, but he hears Jensen whisper something, something that he has to strain his ears badly to hear.
“I was going to propose that night. And I was fucking scared because - well, to me, you were fucking perfect, and I was way out of your league and I thought ... I figured that if I showed you that, it’d be true, so---“
“So what, you decided that you’d cheat on me to get out of proposing to me? What if I was going to fucking propose to you, huh?” Jared replies, a hiccough coming out of his mouth. And it’s a literal question, because he still has the ring he was going to use to propose that night. It’s in his lockbox, which is in his nightstand. He remembers leaving to go get something, being so excited to just, pop out that question, knowing that Jensen would be too afraid to ever propose. It hits him then, that Jensen had just said and, it just makes him pissed off.
“No. You know what, no. That’s fucking bullshit, Jensen. You were scared because you thought I was perfect and you wanted to propose to me but first you wanted to make sure I knew you were a jackass and imperfect so you fucking cheated on me on our anniversary, on the day you were going to propose? Well guess what Jensen, purpose fucking made.” Jared growls, turning around again and wanting to punch the same spot in the wall that he did earlier.
“Jared -“ But Jared’s not listening anymore, pacing instead and instead, walks toward his bedroom door and opens it but before he does, he feels a hand on his arm and he quickly gets turned around, forced into a corner by Jensen. He growls, Jensen close and he wants to leave, just leave right fucking now.
“Let g-“ Except before he can even finish that thought, he can feel Jensen’s lips on his, kissing him steadily and gently nudging his mouth open with his tongue. At first, Jared declines but he knows he can’t do so forever and he’s unable to once Jensen puts his hands on his hips and rubs, which he always loved. He moans at the contact, feverishly missing Jensen’s touches and he puts his arms around Jensen neck, bringing the older man closer to him, slamming their bodies together. It’s then where he can feel the bulge in Jensen’s pants and Jared realizes just how much he fucking missed the other man. He whimpers at the contact and its then that Jensen’s kisses become more feverish.
Next Chapter
Author: jamie_love13
Beta-Edited: Madison, but not for these coming chapters.
Pairings/Characters: Jared/Jensen, Mentions of Jensen/Jeff, Chad/Kenzie, +others
Word Count: 6,000 Words
Rating: NC-17
Summary: The tension between the group is high, especially when Jeff decides to attack Jared.
Disclaimer: Definitely don't own.
Warnings: Heterosex, mentions of more sex.
Notes: Here's Chapter 4. Hope y'all enjoy! Chapter 5 coming up!
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He’s currently sitting at one of the tables with Danneel and Sophia, enjoying himself for the first time in the week and a half that they’ve been stuck in this damn cabin with Jensen. Him and Danneel had been trying to cheer up Sophia, who had been starting to get worried about Chad and his wandering eyes and hands. Currently though, all three of them were completely happy, especially since Danneel had done her famous impression of Bush. Jared could feel the heat on his cheeks and just revelled in the moment, glad to finally be feeling something that he hasn’t felt in such a long time, not even with Tom. His smile fades a little at that and before he can shake his head and get his smile back on his face, no matter how forced it would be, he hears Mike come up behind him.
“Get that smile on for real, Jared, cause we’re having a party!” Jared looks behind him and lets out a grin, knowing the he could really use a party right now. He shakes his head at his friend and smirks towards Danneel and Sophia, before turning back to Mike.
“And how, oh glorious Mike, are we going to have a party with only a bunch of us?” Jared replies, his grin reforming and his eyes twinkling. Jared definitely feels the need to get completely wasted and knows that Sophia and Danneel have the same sentiments that he does. They all need to let loose, get so completely wasted and forget the tensions of the past week and a half. It will all do them good.
Mike grins one more time before he sits next to them all, and folds his hands on the table -“Simple, Chris and Steve have a gig right now. We all know that after their awesome gigs, they hold parties. And voila, we will have a party!” Mike finishes before looking at everyone. Jared feels kind of shocked. Had he been so stuck up in his own problems to forget that some of his best friends had a gig that they were looking forward to so much was tonight? Groaning, he slams his head down onto the table and flips Mike off when he realizes that the other friend is laughing.
“Basically, Genevieve, Sandra and their weird friend Misha is at the gig, filming and getting high.” Mike says, smirking at Jared’s snort when he mentions Misha. Misha Collins is definitely a weird guy, always high off of life and ready to help anyone who needs it. Jared doesn’t know how the lot of them know the guy, they just know that they make their life a hell of a lot more fun.
“So, basically, we’re going to be splitting off into teams and going to do a few things. Jared, you’re going to go with me and Danneel and buy the party decorations while Sophia, Jensen and Jeff will be here, setting up the house by moving all the furniture out of the way. When we come back, Jared’ll switch places with Sophia and help pin the decorations we bought up around the house.” Jared freezes at that, as does everyone else, except Mike, who doesn’t seem to catch the problem and just keeps going on. Jared can feel his heartbeat pick up, and everyone else’s eyes on him, wondering what he’ll be doing, stuck with Jensen and his new boyfriend, if he’ll pull out and have another breakdown. Jared takes a deep gulp, lets the fresh air fill his lungs and expand them before interrupting Mike, who stops talking completely, and looks absolutely confused.
“What, Jay?” He says exasperated, rolling his eyes good naturedly, wondering why he was stopped when he was in prime explanation mode with this party. Jared recognizes that fact that Mike realizes that everyone’s eyes are on them, especially Jared, and are wide and shocked.
“What did I do?” Mike laughs, looking around at everyone and wondering why they open their mouths in shock.
“Mike, seriously, think about what you’ve been saying.” That’s Chad, good old Chad, who had just appeared out of nowhere with Kenzie looking tousled and red. After glancing at Sophia, he can tell that Sophia has no idea what to be pissed about and Mike tries hard not to roll his eyes in annoyance at Chad. Mike looks over at everyone, bites his lip and Jared has to laugh at that but honestly can’t take it anymore.
“Guys, it’ll be fine. I’ll just... ignore them both, get everything done really quickly and then leave them to fuck each other like I’m not there... like the usual.” He says, sighing and biting his lip and getting up, grabbing the keys to his van.
“Dude, no, as your best friend, I’m not going to let you go through that kind of fucking pain again.” Chad says, pulling his arms across his chest and nudging Sophia with his hip, knowing that something is wrong with her and not sure how to fix it.
“Leave me alone, Chad.” She snaps and walks to the other side of Danneel, causing Jared to snort.
“Chad, no offense, but as your best friend, I suggest you learn how you’re hurting the most perfect girl out there for you, before trying to protect my feelings.” Jared states while shrugging his shoulders and arching his eyebrow. Chad sighs before running his hand through his hair and letting a glare come out.
“I’m just saying Jared, the dude put you into the fucking hospital because of what he did. There’s no way I’m going to let you stay in the same room with the two of them, pretending to be okay when all you’re really doing is screaming on the inside.” Jared sighs before looking down at the ground, knowing his best friend is right.
“Alright, a compromise then. You stay with me during that time.” Chad nods and everyone walks to the car to pick up the decorations.
“Shit, dude, fuck, I’m so sorry.” Mike says as the guys and Danneel drive to the party store, biting his lip and slamming his head down on the dash of the car.
“Dude, stop that, I don’t want you losing the rest of your ten brain cells by doing that,” Jared chuckles and watches as Mike sighs and does indeed stop.
“Yeah, but you have no idea how bad I’ve been feeling since realizing that I paired you up to put decorations up with them.” Mike replies, biting his lip and opening his eyes wide and misty-like. Jared sighs before patting his friends bald head, laughing as he feels lotion on the top.
“You missed a spot, dude.” He says, rubbing his hand on Mike’s leg. Mike snorts at that before looking at Jared one more time.
“Dude, it’s ok. I’ll deal somehow, and with Chad there, nothing will get too out of hand.” He replies and when he hears Danneel snort from behind him he has to shrug and laugh.
“Okay, so I’ll have to be careful in case Chad get’s too out of hand with vocalizing his thoughts about Jensen and... his guy, but other than that, things should be fine, you guys.” Jared looks through the rear-view mirror and can see Danneel looking at him and he sighs.
“Seriously, Danneel, everything will be fine,” He says and when she nods her head lightly, he knows that she’s done talking about it - for now. He pulls in across from the grocery store and into the parking lot of the party decoration store - why they don’t just keep everything together in a small town like this, he has no clue - and shuts off his car. The group of them get out of the car and head towards the store doors.
“Mike, is there another list,” Jared questions, humour indicated in his voice and Mike looks over at him and sticks his tongue out.
“Fuck you Jay, my lists make a chick orgasm.” Jared laughs at that before quickly hitting Mike in the hand and collecting the list from his other hand. He quickly skims the list and smirks, looking up at Mike.
“Dude, you forgot one important fucking thing,”
“What?” Mike says and Danneel laughs when she looks over Jared’s tall ass body and sees what he means.
“You forgot the fuckin’ condoms, idiot!” He shouts, causing people to stare at him and some of the older women look at them in disgust. He can’t help but laugh and ignore them before turning back to Mike and grinning. Mike grins back and they continue throughout the store, collecting items that are on the list and a few miscellaneous items that aren’t on the list but the three of them remembered. A good half hour later, the three of them are in the checkout line, ringing their items through and putting them in bags, then making their way to the car and cabin.
And as they do, Jared feels dreadful.
Everything is tense, what with Chad next to Jared’s left side, glaring daggers at Jensen and Jeff, who are on his right side, a little ways off, glaring right back at Chad. Jared sighs before biting his lip and panning over to where Jensen and Jeff are.
He can feel an ache in his chest when he looks over at them, and whenever he sees Jeff brush a hand against Jensen, his heart just turns completely cold, nearly shattering with the weight of missing his ex-boyfriend. It’s during this time that Jared definitely recognizes the fact that getting drunk tonight would be the best plan for him, especially since being in the same cabin as Jensen, let alone the same room as him, for the first time in a year, is killing him. He lets out a breath and continues working on trying to pin the banner up saying Welcome to the Party correctly. It’s a hard thing to do though, with everyone glaring at everyone else.
“Chad, stop it and help me.” He says, glaring his own set of daggers at his best friend, trying to get his attention. It takes a few minutes but soon enough, Chad nods his head and takes his eyes away from the other two guys and helps Jared pin the banner. The tension in the room is thick enough to cut and Jared doesn’t know how he’s going to be able to get through this one last thing. He was able to pull the decoration set up quite clearly and quickly, ignoring his ex-boyfriend and then some. However, after a good hour of being in the same room as him, things started getting more tense, especially when Jeff started getting more handsy and Chad started baring his teeth.
“Because Chad’s your bitch.” Jared freezes at that, not wanting to turn around and glare at Jeff for saying such a thing but fuck if that wasn’t uncalled for. Chad, however, has no qualms about calling the bastard out.
“No, I’m not Jared’s bitch. How about you go fuck some pretty chick like you’ve been doing all week instead of causing my boy pain!” Chad growls and Jared tenses even more than before. He’s had his suspicions that Jeff had been cheating on Jensen throughout the week with Sandy, but Jared never knew how to feel about that - what goes around comes around and all that shit - but Jared would never want to have Jensen have that much pain put onto him.
“Hey, before you go making assumptions about my boyfriend, how about you fix things with your girlfriend!” That’s Jensen, and there’s anger and protection and love in his voice that just makes Jared even angrier than he’s ever been, because how does Jensen not fucking see what an asshole Jeff truly is?
“And how about before you go judging Chad like he’s still your friend, you recognize the fact that your boyfriends a cheap slut who’ll get his kicks off of anything!” Jared snaps, sick and tired and all of the tension that’s been thrumming through his body releasing itself into him and coming out for the first time in twelve months.
“How about you shut the fuck up Jay about shit you don’t know!” Jensen shouts, his fists clenching in anger. Jared clenches his own fists in anger and steps closer.
“How about you not fucking call me Jay, since you lost that will when you fucking cheated on me on our anniversary.” He shouts back, everyone that’s around coming closer to listen and break up anything that might begin to happen. Jared can feel the power of the shout thrumming through him, wanting to get all of this fucking shit out of him for the first time, and to the shock of everyone else, he continues his yelling.
“And how about you get the damn stick out of your ass and realize what goes around, comes around, that your precious boyfriend has been cheating on you and that you need to fucking stop being such an asshole because just being near you makes me want to do some drastic shit that I haven’t done since you fucking left me. And while we’re at it, how about you fucking apologize for fucking leaving me for the guy you fucking cheated on me with, and how about you apologize to everyone else for putting them in the middle, because no one deserved that, especially not them. Lastly, why don’t you just fucking leave, because it’s obvious that you don’t want to be here, near me, the poor little puppy that fell completely in love with you just so you could hurt him like you never fucking cared,” Jared finishes, panting heavily and tears making his eyes blurry. His fists are clenched so badly that he can feel rivulets of blood streaming down his palms and dripping onto the ground, a steady drip, drip, drip. Everyone around him is looking at him with wide eyes, shocked and Jared can’t help but a feel a little wrecked at that. He’s done so much since Jensen left him but not once did he ever admit out loud what he wanted to. He never admitted what it was that Jensen had done to him that made him so mad, so hurt and heartbroken, even though everyone had known. Not only that, but Jared had never admitted, not once, just how he felt about that, or what he felt about Jensen and god damn fucking Jeff being in the same place as him, and he’s panting heavily and the tears are coming down and all he can think of is the fact that Jensen and Jeff are probably just going to leave so they can laugh at him some more. He sees a movement out of his eye and notices Danneel and Sophia come up to his sides, and pulling him away.
“Come on Jay, let’s go.” Jared only sees Jensen, though, looking completely shocked and pale skinned.
Everything is loud, boisterous. There only an hour into the party, but it is completely going to be one of the best Mike’s ever thrown. There are people everywhere, some having arrived already completely plastered - see: Chris and Steve, but that’s the usual after a gig that they rocked at - and even more so, a lot more people were high, which not a lot of people really liked but didn’t really give a shit about once they were drunk. The most shocking thing though was the fact that somewhere in Mike’s house, somewhere dark and danky, hopeful to god not in one of the basement bedrooms, there were honest to god drugs being used. Everyone looked the other way when it came to those people doing the crazy shit, but if something else was going on with those drugs, then that’s when everyone would do some kicking out. In the main area of the cabin, things are tightly packed even though the couch has been plasticized and moved to the very far wall, near the patio/porch doors. The floor is full of people dancing - or, well, almost like fucking standing up. If you look closely, you will find Sophia in the middle of that throng, dancing with Danneel, a drink in her left hand and Danneel’s hand on her hip. Sophia’s head is thrown back in laughter, her eyes wide and open, staring at Danneel and Danneel smiling back, blushing. If you look even harder, you will find Chad making out with Kenzie. They’re against another wall, close to the stairs and he has his hands underneath Kenzie’s top, skimming over her abs and causing her to giggle. If you put the two circumstances together, you would think that Sophia is drunkenly staring at Danneel with lust and possibly love her in her eyes because of Chad except at this moment, Chad isn’t even on Sophia’s mind, nor does Sophia want him to be. In the kitchen, Jared’s drinking shot for shot, staring rapidly at Tom and Mike, who are in a corner together, laughing. Jared’s not jealous, no, because earlier in the week he had told Tom, had told him that he lied, that Tom probably wasn’t the one who could fix Jared, and Tom had been cool with that, had even said he might have feelings for someone else. Now, looking at Tom and Mike, Jared could tell just who Tom might have feelings for and he couldn’t help but grin at that thought. He just truly hoped nothing happened between the two of them because well, Tom and Jared aren’t exactly separated just yet. Somewhere else in the kitchen is Jensen, staring rapidly at Jared, drinking even more than he is and pissed off to all hell. Jensen, good old Jensen is completely upset that Jared had told him those things earlier, had the nerve to go and say anything like that to him when Jared was in the wrong. And Jensen wanted to cause some trouble.
Everything is feverous, Chad’s hands are everywhere and he can feel the pressure of Kenzie against his body, causing his dick to harden just slightly. He knows he shouldn’t be doing this, knows he should be downstairs with his girlfriend, telling her how sorry he is but god damn, he just can’t. There’s something about Kenzie, something that’s been making him chase her these whole near two weeks. He puts more pressure into the kiss, starts chasing Kenzie’s tongue and squeezing her breast, making a small moan come out of her mouth, causing Chad to grin in appreciation. God, there’s something about her that get’s to Chad. He pushes her back into another wall now that they’re no longer on the stairs - and damn if that’s a dangerous feat - and see’s her bedroom in the vicinity. While they haven’t truly slept together yet, they’ve definitely made out previously and have definitely gotten close to sleeping together, but it’s been enough that Chad recognizes the door immediately. He opens the door, sliding the two of them into the bedroom before anyone recognized them, recognized the fact that Chad was cheating on his current girlfriend - and he did feel guilty, he did! - and recognized the fact that Chad wasn’t being the best friend he should be, by showing a trait that Jared had begun to hate since Jensen, but Chad wasn’t exactly thinking about Jared right now.
The two of them are on the bed now, with Chad taking of Kenzie’s top and moaning in pleasure when he realizes that she had gone top commando, and damn if that isn’t hot. He latches onto one of her breasts with his mouth, fumbling with his pants while he does so and while she fumbles with his, the need to have sex stronger than ever. When they finally get all of their clothing off, Chad takes a break to look at Kenzie and is absolutely stunned into silence at her beauty. He doesn’t feel guilty, he really doesn’t but this girl is so beautiful, so young and she makes him feel something he hasn’t felt since when he first met Sophia. He grins before going down and kissing Kenzie slowly, with all the love he feels inside him, pouring out into the kiss and into Kenzie’s soul. She kisses him back and it’s then that Chad enters into Kenzie, slowly, not wanting to hurt her for their first time. He moans at the contact, can feel it reverberate through the kiss and hardens whilst he’s inside the girl, causing her to moan. He begins thrusting slowly, building the pressure between the two of them into something definitely more.
“Faster, Chad.” Kenzie moans, running her fingers through his hair and Chad complies, starting to go a little faster, just enough speed and thrust to make Kenzie moan a little louder than before. Pretty soon, he can feel his build up coming and when Kenzie’s walls clench around him, he comes quickly before falling onto her.
The music is loud and boisterous, the bass thumping through the walls as Jensen looks around the living area from the couch he’s on. He’d kicked a couple making out on it off a good thirty minutes ago, waiting for Chris and Steve to get their asses onto the makeshift stage and play a song that they recently wrote. Jensen’s excited to hear it, promises made to him that the song would kick ass and that he’d absolutely love it. He currently has a beer in his hand, condensation running down the bottle and landing on the edges of his hand. It’s cool enough that it keeps Jensen nice and cool. When he finally hears cheers from the crowd, he arches and turns his body, finally seeing Chris and Steve making their way to the stage, causing Jensen to grin in excitement. Jensen takes another gulp of his beer, finding it empty and sighing. He can hear the endnotes of the beginning lyrics and quickly, Jensen realizes he should probably go and find himself another drink, before he sobers up and gets to be one of those guys that is no fun at a party. He looks up at Chris and Steve, quickly nodding a hello to them and begins to leave the room, his hands held high above his head, making him able to move more swiftly through the room. He spots a few of his friends here and there, drinks in their hands and notices Chad and Kenzie coming down the stairs before he quickly turns his head away. If there was one thing Jensen never understood, it was the fact that Chad always had his wandering eyes, even though he had a great woman next to his side, constantly. It was definitely the one thing that Jensen judged him about, though, if anyone else were to hear him say that, they’d give him a pointed look and make him feel even shittier about himself. Sighing, and deciding he really needed that fucking drink and fast, he rushes over to the kitchen area, deciding to fuck beer and go for something harder.
However, once he arrives into the kitchen he stops quickly at the sight of Jared, holding a shot glass of tequila in his hand, grinning at whatever it is Danneel is saying. Jensen won’t lie, he misses Jared like he lost a limb, but he also misses Danneel, knows that he fucked up their friendship by hurting Jared and if he could have anything, it would be to have Danneel’s friendship back and Jared’s love. But he remembers what Jared had said to him earlier on, remembers how pissed off he had gotten and quickly brings that anger back up into his persona, his fists clenching and a smirk entering his face - a facade, and everyone knows it but right now, Jensen doesn’t give a shit. He walks over to Jared, grins, and takes his glass, drinking it quickly. It’s on.
Danneel isn’t an idiot, knows that Jared is fucking pining for Jensen, missing him as much as someone misses someone they’ve lost forever - which Jared thinks he has - knows Jensen is missing Jared just as much. At the same time though, she knows that Jensen is too much of a stubborn bastard to do anything about his hurt, his emotions for Jared and that it’s causing Jared even more pain. Knows that in order for Jensen to have the one discussion with Jared that everyone wants them to have, they have to both be incredible drunk and uncaring towards the fact that they’re anywhere near each other. At first, Danneel always thought that Jared wouldn’t mind being too close to Jensen here, even if it did cause him pain, but ever since his outburst a little while before the party, Danneel has no idea what to do with Jared. If she had known, truly fucking known how Jared had felt, she would’ve helped him in any she could have, and she knows that Sophia feels the same.
Quickly glancing over to her friend, Danneel can feel the heat spreading through her cheeks. She’s never admitted it, not even to Jared - though, she’s positive he knows - but she always had a crush on Sophia, and couldn’t help but wonder why she was with a guy like Chad, a guy who didn’t know just what he had, just what he was missing the fuck out on. She sighs before looking towards Jared and seeing Jensen appear with a smirk on his face, and the hair on the back of her neck raises. She doesn’t know what he’s getting at, but when he grabs Jared’s shot glass and drinks from it right away, she knows that he’s posing a challenge, that he’s angry enough to want a fight and quickly, looking over to Sophia, she can tell that the other woman saw the exact same thing and has the exact same thought. Without any preamble, the two girls head toward Jared and Jensen, ready to break anything that might happen apart, because they know, they fucking know that Jared’s in no mood for this and that he’s loose and drunk enough that if Jensen does something to provoke him, the proverbial shit will hit the fucking fan. When Danneel finally gets to Jared, she see’s that Sophia is already there, rubbing his arms and trying to calm him down while he glares at Jensen.
“Sophia, no. Let my arm go and pass me the fucking tequila.” He says with venom, glaring at Jensen who keeps smirking. Danneel is shocked at Jared’s voice in that sentence and takes a gulp of fresh air, watching as Jared pours the tequila Sophia gives him into two different shot glasses.
“First one to puke loses.” Jensen smirks, and Danneel can’t help but feel hesitant, especially when she realizes that many of their friends are watching, some getting ready to cheer on either Jensen or Jared.
“Jared, c’mon, don’t do this,” She begs, trying to take away his shot glasses but he stops her with a glare, which softens slightly.
“Gotta, Dani. Jensen needs to prove his damn manhood,” He laughs before starting to take drink after drink.
***
Sophia can only watch as Jared and Jensen match each other for shots of tequila drank, and she can’t help but feel hesitant. She bites her lip and looks around, trying to gauge and see who’s here and what they’re doing, just to make sure, in case a fight breaks out. She spots her boyfriend, his arm around Kenzie, whispering in her ear and stroking her arm slowly, which Sophia recognizes as his after-sex gesture and she can’t help but feel a little bit of anger and a little bit of resignation. She knows that their relationship is useless now, that he’ll just keep going to her and that hurts, because she knows she’s a great girl, knows she deserves better, but there’s always been something Chad that she couldn’t help but stay away from. Suddenly, he looks up and into her eyes and he starts to come towards her but she can’t take that, starts shaking her head, tears blurring her vision before she turns around and head towards Danneel and the problem with Jared.
When she does so, she realizes that the drinking is definitely slower, and the boys are definitely more drunk, if anything, by their slurring and unsteady movements. She bites her lip when she hears Jared ask a question and knows instantly that the night is only going to end heartbreak.
She hears him ask again, feels her heartbreak, and suddenly, he’s no longer quiet, no longer silent with his questions.
“Why, Jensen? Why’d you fucking do it?” He shouts, causing the attention of everyone in the kitchen around them to look their way.
Jared can feel the heat on his face, can feel the alcohol thrumming through his blood and he just wants to fucking have some answers, especially with why he’s still so god damn heartbroken, especially after a year of not being with Jensen.
“Just fucking tell me why Jensen. Why the fuck did you cheat on me, on our fucking anniversary?” He whimpers, ignoring everyone that’s around them right now - ignoring the fact that Danneel and Sophia want him to stop, the fact that Chad is looking at Jensen with anger in him and Chris and Steve is no longer singing, instead, watching the two of them fight. He has no clue where Jeff and Tom are, thank fucking god, doesn’t even know where Mike is, either. In the far corner, he can see Misha talking to Genevieve and Sandy, smoking a joint while discreetly trying to steal glances at them. He see’s Jensen look down, fiddle with his shot glass, making it twirl on its edge before he shrugs his shoulders.
“Don’t you dare fucking shrug this off like it’s nothing, Ackles. Fuckin ‘ tell me -“ Jared slurs, clutching the kitchen counter to stop himself from falling - “Just fuckin’ tell me why you cheated on me on such an important fucking day,” he nearly yells and he can hear Danneel say they should take this somewhere less private, hear Jensen agree, can see him walk away and damn if he’s going to let that bastard walk away right now. No way in hell is he going to let that happen.
“Hey!” He yells at Jensen, who’s already half way to the basement door. He can see Jensen stop in mid pause, and he won’t let the bastard walk away, not this time.
“Don’t fucking walk away either. I deserve, after a year of missing you, of wondering what the hell I did wrong, I fucking deserve to know why you felt me unworthy enough of you to cheat on me with a guy like fucking Jeff Morgan.” He shouts, his fists clenched and his breathing coming in short, rapt, pants.
“Jay - Jay, please don’t do this. Not up here, not in front of everyone. At least come downstairs with me so we can hash this out.” Jensen replies and he sounds so broken and Jared hates that because if anything, he’s the one that should be feeling broken, not fucking Jensen. He sighs, looks around and finally feels the stares of everyone’s eyes looking in at him, finding out exactly what was going on with him. He realizes then that he doesn’t want anyone other than his close friends knowing why he’s so fucked up, so he looks upwards and reluctantly, follows Jensen into the basement, slamming the door.
He rushes down the steps, stepping in close to Jensen and baring his teeth when Jensen turns around. He watches Jensen visibly deflate and nearly does so himself, but he’s too drunk and too tense to do so.
“Well, why?” He snarls, nearly punching the wall next to Jensen.
“I was scared, Jay. So fucking scared,” Jensen replies but he doesn’t stop, no way does he stop - “At first, I told myself I had no idea why I did such a thing, but I knew I was lying to myself, because after a week without you, I knew - I fucking realized how scared I was.” Jensen says, looking down at his shoes and biting his lip. Jared looks at him, confusion in his eyes and written all over his face.
“Why the hell would you be so scared Jensen. We were together for ten fucking years. TEN YEARS, JENSEN. Why would you get scared then?” He shouts, tears finally breaking through his eyes and rolling down his cheeks. He wipes them away furiously, stepping back from Jensen, needing to breathe in something fresh for once. He feels even tenser than before, and he’s fucking shaking, and damn if he’s never had that before. He turns away from Jensen and starts to pace before he spots a padded spot in the wall. Walking over to it, he swiftly punches that spot, causing his knuckles to crack open a smidge and bleed and the padding to break to the ground, just like his fucking heart is.
“Jay-“
“Don’t you fucking dare call me that Jensen.” He growls, not wanting to hear the love that name use to give to him. He leans down, sitting his ass on the cold basement ground and it takes him a moment, but he hears Jensen whisper something, something that he has to strain his ears badly to hear.
“I was going to propose that night. And I was fucking scared because - well, to me, you were fucking perfect, and I was way out of your league and I thought ... I figured that if I showed you that, it’d be true, so---“
“So what, you decided that you’d cheat on me to get out of proposing to me? What if I was going to fucking propose to you, huh?” Jared replies, a hiccough coming out of his mouth. And it’s a literal question, because he still has the ring he was going to use to propose that night. It’s in his lockbox, which is in his nightstand. He remembers leaving to go get something, being so excited to just, pop out that question, knowing that Jensen would be too afraid to ever propose. It hits him then, that Jensen had just said and, it just makes him pissed off.
“No. You know what, no. That’s fucking bullshit, Jensen. You were scared because you thought I was perfect and you wanted to propose to me but first you wanted to make sure I knew you were a jackass and imperfect so you fucking cheated on me on our anniversary, on the day you were going to propose? Well guess what Jensen, purpose fucking made.” Jared growls, turning around again and wanting to punch the same spot in the wall that he did earlier.
“Jared -“ But Jared’s not listening anymore, pacing instead and instead, walks toward his bedroom door and opens it but before he does, he feels a hand on his arm and he quickly gets turned around, forced into a corner by Jensen. He growls, Jensen close and he wants to leave, just leave right fucking now.
“Let g-“ Except before he can even finish that thought, he can feel Jensen’s lips on his, kissing him steadily and gently nudging his mouth open with his tongue. At first, Jared declines but he knows he can’t do so forever and he’s unable to once Jensen puts his hands on his hips and rubs, which he always loved. He moans at the contact, feverishly missing Jensen’s touches and he puts his arms around Jensen neck, bringing the older man closer to him, slamming their bodies together. It’s then where he can feel the bulge in Jensen’s pants and Jared realizes just how much he fucking missed the other man. He whimpers at the contact and its then that Jensen’s kisses become more feverish.
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