(no subject)
Okay, here it comes, this is my emo whiny depressed forlorn aggravated sad angry post of the year. I have one every year just to unload so here it is.
You know what sucks? I suck. Or maybe it's not me, maybe it is the women I always find myself interested in lately. But as it stands, all of the women I have been interested in since I got back on the market have either said directly or given me the impression of 'Land, you are a wonderful person, an amazing friend, but you aren't my type and I really just want to be friends with you.'
GRR!
Honestly, I don't know what it is about me. Do I have this thing where I become interested in the women I deep down inside are either out of my league or just won't go for a guy like me? But wait a minute...Haven't I always said that I don't have a league, that I can make anything happen if I wanted it bad enough? Oh yeah, that mantra has seemed to be helping me out a lot. Helping me out so much that the weekend before break I spent the entire time inadvertently hooking up my guy friends with most of the women I was interested in. And helping me out so much that I spend a good portion of every day listening to female friends complain about there guy issues.
I've become just like that quote on bash.org:
'Being one of the nice guys as far as women are concerned can be summarized by the following analogy. Being a nice guy is like going into work one day and finding out that you have an interview with your boss for a promotion you have been working towards for a while. When the interview is over, your boss (aka the women you are interested in) says to you, 'You aren't quite what we are looking for to fill this position but thanks for coming in and keep up the good work and you'll get there someday.' You get up to leave and just as you get to the door she says, 'Oh, and we'll be calling from time to time to complain about the guy we are actually going to hire. Thanks!' '
Yeup, thats me. So apparently if I just keep doing what I am doing I will get where I want to be eventually. I hate that word. Eventually. It is a horrible word.
I've given serious thought to becoming one of those guys that goes to parties and gets drunk and gets women drunk and then has sex with a ton of women. I thought long and hard about it and I know I could do it because I have buckets of charm. No one will deny the fact that I can be one charming son of bitch. But I could never be the drunken sex guy. Not only would people hate me, but I would hate myself. I would lose all respect for myself. It would not be pretty. So that option is out.
So if I am charming, and I know more than my fair share of beautiful women, what is the problem? Is it my looks? Maybe I am just not good looking enough for the women I am interested in. I won't deny that I am a goofy looking kid, but I don't think I am not good looking. Part of it is my hair but that is a part of me and I refuse to lose my hair for anyone. I did that once and it was the second biggest mistake of my life. My hair stays. It's might be my looks but I don't believe in changing my looks just to impress people. I am who I am, and if people can't see that and accept that then whatever.
Maybe it is because everyone thinks of me as the funny man. I'm the guy who makes everyone laugh and cheers everyone up. Maybe I can't be the guy who makes everyone laugh and cheers everyone up and is going out with this person. That pretty retarded if you ask me but maybe that's what it is.
A lot of people would say that if women can't seem to like me for the person I am they aren't worth my time, and that is true, but only partly so. I also believe that if you want something you pursue. and you don't give up until you have it or there is absolutely zero chance of getting it. And even if people aren't interested in dating me, I still believe that everyone is worth my time anyway. So maybe I am screwing myself over from the get go.
I don't know, but I have a headache now from thinking about this and from being tired, so I am going to bed.
You know what sucks? I suck. Or maybe it's not me, maybe it is the women I always find myself interested in lately. But as it stands, all of the women I have been interested in since I got back on the market have either said directly or given me the impression of 'Land, you are a wonderful person, an amazing friend, but you aren't my type and I really just want to be friends with you.'
GRR!
Honestly, I don't know what it is about me. Do I have this thing where I become interested in the women I deep down inside are either out of my league or just won't go for a guy like me? But wait a minute...Haven't I always said that I don't have a league, that I can make anything happen if I wanted it bad enough? Oh yeah, that mantra has seemed to be helping me out a lot. Helping me out so much that the weekend before break I spent the entire time inadvertently hooking up my guy friends with most of the women I was interested in. And helping me out so much that I spend a good portion of every day listening to female friends complain about there guy issues.
I've become just like that quote on bash.org:
'Being one of the nice guys as far as women are concerned can be summarized by the following analogy. Being a nice guy is like going into work one day and finding out that you have an interview with your boss for a promotion you have been working towards for a while. When the interview is over, your boss (aka the women you are interested in) says to you, 'You aren't quite what we are looking for to fill this position but thanks for coming in and keep up the good work and you'll get there someday.' You get up to leave and just as you get to the door she says, 'Oh, and we'll be calling from time to time to complain about the guy we are actually going to hire. Thanks!' '
Yeup, thats me. So apparently if I just keep doing what I am doing I will get where I want to be eventually. I hate that word. Eventually. It is a horrible word.
I've given serious thought to becoming one of those guys that goes to parties and gets drunk and gets women drunk and then has sex with a ton of women. I thought long and hard about it and I know I could do it because I have buckets of charm. No one will deny the fact that I can be one charming son of bitch. But I could never be the drunken sex guy. Not only would people hate me, but I would hate myself. I would lose all respect for myself. It would not be pretty. So that option is out.
So if I am charming, and I know more than my fair share of beautiful women, what is the problem? Is it my looks? Maybe I am just not good looking enough for the women I am interested in. I won't deny that I am a goofy looking kid, but I don't think I am not good looking. Part of it is my hair but that is a part of me and I refuse to lose my hair for anyone. I did that once and it was the second biggest mistake of my life. My hair stays. It's might be my looks but I don't believe in changing my looks just to impress people. I am who I am, and if people can't see that and accept that then whatever.
Maybe it is because everyone thinks of me as the funny man. I'm the guy who makes everyone laugh and cheers everyone up. Maybe I can't be the guy who makes everyone laugh and cheers everyone up and is going out with this person. That pretty retarded if you ask me but maybe that's what it is.
A lot of people would say that if women can't seem to like me for the person I am they aren't worth my time, and that is true, but only partly so. I also believe that if you want something you pursue. and you don't give up until you have it or there is absolutely zero chance of getting it. And even if people aren't interested in dating me, I still believe that everyone is worth my time anyway. So maybe I am screwing myself over from the get go.
I don't know, but I have a headache now from thinking about this and from being tired, so I am going to bed.