difficult not to be a little bit disappointed (perfect circle)
Man, what a weekend. Hate to see it go so fast. Especially since I spent about 5 hours today reading and doing stuff I put off. Man I should've thought twice before signing up for three consecutive history classes. Granted they aren't traditional history classes, they are math, religion, and film history classes. But it's like I forgot how much I hated reading words. Especially long collections of words that form sentences and collections of sentences that form paragraphs and so on. What a drag!
As for the weekend. I finally accomplished one of my boyhood dreams. On one hand I'm proud of that and on the other I am very much not. Who knew such a notable event in a young man's life would be remembered so markedly bittersweet, shortly over 48 hrs since it happened. No, I didn't lose my virginity. For the record, I passed that milestone a couple years ago. No, this was almost better. You know how in Office Space the main character asks his next door neighbor what he'd do with a million dollars... well, that's kinda what I did. Except it wasn't an all out thing like you read about in Penthouse or wherever. It was just making out. But it's like this life-altering thing for me. All of a sudden I'm no longer intrigued about what it'd be like with another girl. Having done this, I could easily die a satisfied man. Having this experience allows me to commit to and love Traci in a way that the previously distracted Joe wasn't quite able. For the most part, this leaves no stone unturned, and while I may be asked to pursue other interests if I go abroad junior year, there is such a markedly diminished desire to actually do that.
That said, I miss Traci dearly. It's so nice to be so much closer geographically now than we were this summer, but at the same time I'd rather have her down the street or across the hall, or in my bed. One day.
As for the weekend. I finally accomplished one of my boyhood dreams. On one hand I'm proud of that and on the other I am very much not. Who knew such a notable event in a young man's life would be remembered so markedly bittersweet, shortly over 48 hrs since it happened. No, I didn't lose my virginity. For the record, I passed that milestone a couple years ago. No, this was almost better. You know how in Office Space the main character asks his next door neighbor what he'd do with a million dollars... well, that's kinda what I did. Except it wasn't an all out thing like you read about in Penthouse or wherever. It was just making out. But it's like this life-altering thing for me. All of a sudden I'm no longer intrigued about what it'd be like with another girl. Having done this, I could easily die a satisfied man. Having this experience allows me to commit to and love Traci in a way that the previously distracted Joe wasn't quite able. For the most part, this leaves no stone unturned, and while I may be asked to pursue other interests if I go abroad junior year, there is such a markedly diminished desire to actually do that.
That said, I miss Traci dearly. It's so nice to be so much closer geographically now than we were this summer, but at the same time I'd rather have her down the street or across the hall, or in my bed. One day.