So much guilt you'd think I was a Catholic ...

Being dragged through it, heavied with errors and missteps, is weighing me down. Actually, its been weighing me down since I was 17 and I think I'm finally cracking after 4 years. Sucked of magic - maybe this is life? I can wish there was a handbook, but even then, I'd be without answers ( Read more... )

I don't think I fully know me beyond you. I've underestimated myself, allowed others to underestimate me. This all started with a simple, funny line that involved car accidents that I can't remember now ( Read more... )

I realize now it was stupid for me to call you. You can't be anything for me. Maybe you never were.

Its the long-range pressure I don't do well with. I think its the waiting. I can't just do it all in one go, like a "don't-stop-adrenaline-pumping" sort of thing. I'm impatient, and long stretches of time with little to keep my mind on make me anxious. Especially when I'm in a stressful situation that I have to get myself through, but have to wait ( Read more... )