if a coffee pot can't be operated without first drinking a pot of coffee...
as you may surmise from the subject line, i'm going to write about poorly designed and illogical items today. or rant.
i have this coffee maker. it's got a superb thermal carafe that i like because the coffee stays warm into the afternoon. if i get distracted and don't finish it off in the morning, the coffee is warm, but not scorched or condensed to pitch when i get around to finishing it.
that is the sole redeeming quality of the infernal monster.
it has a reasonably simple timer on it that i'm competent to set, as long as it's night time and i'm awake. that's reasonable, i only ever want to set the pot to brew on a timer at night when i'm planning to get up early the next day. however, EVERY SINGLE TIME i have attempted to use the timer feature on it, something has gone wrong. and i don't mean "wrong" in the mild sense that i had to wake up and push the brew button because i'm not competent to set the timer, i mean WRONG in the sense that a zombified, decaffeinated me has to wipe the counter and wring coffee out into a cup to drink it. this abysmal, cantankerous beast of a coffee maker pees all over the kitchen if i dare to leave it unattended. so after i've had my towel-infused coffee, i still have to clean the kitchen counters, floors, cabinets, drawers, etc. then i have to make another pot so i'll have a second cup.
sometimes, it will pee all over the counter even when i stay and hold its hand while it perks. this is definitely its most aggravating feature. second-most-aggravating is the very particular way you have to pour from the carafe to make the coffee go where the spout is pointed. if you don't have all the iron filings in your body aligned just so, the coffee just runs down the front of the carafe and goes all over the counter. either way, coffee on the counter... it's enough to make me chew coffee beans.
rose has been managing the coffee pot for most of the last two years. i think it's the only animal in the house that likes her better than me, because it never pees on the counter on her watch, but she can't work the timer.
today was the last straw. i set the pot up to brew, did all the stupid little checks to ensure it wouldn't go off the rails and spew coffee all over the room, and waited while it started brewing to make sure it was going smoothly. and when i came back a few minutes later to get a cuppa? you guessed it. coffee and grounds all over the countertop. i think in this analogy, that counts as peeing and pooping on my counter.
so today, i'm going out to buy a new fscking coffee maker that i can operate without having to drink a pot of coffee first. and it'll have a thermal carafe.
i have this coffee maker. it's got a superb thermal carafe that i like because the coffee stays warm into the afternoon. if i get distracted and don't finish it off in the morning, the coffee is warm, but not scorched or condensed to pitch when i get around to finishing it.
that is the sole redeeming quality of the infernal monster.
it has a reasonably simple timer on it that i'm competent to set, as long as it's night time and i'm awake. that's reasonable, i only ever want to set the pot to brew on a timer at night when i'm planning to get up early the next day. however, EVERY SINGLE TIME i have attempted to use the timer feature on it, something has gone wrong. and i don't mean "wrong" in the mild sense that i had to wake up and push the brew button because i'm not competent to set the timer, i mean WRONG in the sense that a zombified, decaffeinated me has to wipe the counter and wring coffee out into a cup to drink it. this abysmal, cantankerous beast of a coffee maker pees all over the kitchen if i dare to leave it unattended. so after i've had my towel-infused coffee, i still have to clean the kitchen counters, floors, cabinets, drawers, etc. then i have to make another pot so i'll have a second cup.
sometimes, it will pee all over the counter even when i stay and hold its hand while it perks. this is definitely its most aggravating feature. second-most-aggravating is the very particular way you have to pour from the carafe to make the coffee go where the spout is pointed. if you don't have all the iron filings in your body aligned just so, the coffee just runs down the front of the carafe and goes all over the counter. either way, coffee on the counter... it's enough to make me chew coffee beans.
rose has been managing the coffee pot for most of the last two years. i think it's the only animal in the house that likes her better than me, because it never pees on the counter on her watch, but she can't work the timer.
today was the last straw. i set the pot up to brew, did all the stupid little checks to ensure it wouldn't go off the rails and spew coffee all over the room, and waited while it started brewing to make sure it was going smoothly. and when i came back a few minutes later to get a cuppa? you guessed it. coffee and grounds all over the countertop. i think in this analogy, that counts as peeing and pooping on my counter.
so today, i'm going out to buy a new fscking coffee maker that i can operate without having to drink a pot of coffee first. and it'll have a thermal carafe.