Fic (TVD): "Letters From the Sky" (3/?)
Story Title: "Letters From the Sky"
Rating: T (for language/violence and I might change the rating later for sexual situations)
Pairings: Damon/Elena, Stefan/Caroline, Bonnie/Jeremy. (friendships) Stefan/Damon, Bonnie/Damon, Elena/Alaric/Jeremy, Matt/Caroline, Stefan/Elena, Damon/Alaric, Elena/Bonnie/Caroline
Description: It's a few months after the other side collapsed in on itself. Refusing to accept the possibility that Damon and Bonnie have disappeared from the world entirely, Elena secretly searches for answers. Stefan finds his sanity deteriorating in a way he didn't expect. Jeremy has closed himself off from everyone. Alaric and Caroline, while dealing with their own grief, struggle to keep everyone together. Meanwhile, Damon and Bonnie attempt to make sense of where they've ended up and hang on to the possibility of returning home.
A/N: Seriously, you guys continue to be AWESOME! I've never gotten feedback like this on any of my fanfictions before, so this is truly amazing. Each and every word is incredibly valuable to me. I am sorry that it took over 2 weeks for this update, but in all the stress that comes with moving, it was getting hard to write. BUT I did finally finish, and I hope you think this chapter is up to par. It was very difficult to write.
This chapter title is taken from the song "Brother" by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros. I HIGHLY recommend looking that song up. It's wonderful and is actually a really fitting song for Damon and Stefan.
Thanks again to florencia7! Love you lots! If you haven't read her fic "If and Only If", I suggest putting this story down for moment and go read that. It's beautiful!
Alternative Links: (FF.net/AO3)
Previous Chapters ( 1/ 2)
Chapter 3: Undead Audio
Caroline Forbes has never been truly alone before. Sure, she might have felt that way at times, like no one was willing to put the same amount of effort into a relationship with her the same way she did for them. She was speaking from her deepest insecurities when she said she felt like the back-up in everyone's lives. Back-up friend, back-up girlfriend. Things like work and other, more important people, always came first in list of priorities. It made her feel unloved and not wanted, but now… now was a different story.
Now she really was alone.
She looked around at the nearly empty dorm; the only evidence that suggested someone lived there was all contained in one corner of the room. Housing tried to pressure her into getting new roommates now that it looked like Elena and Bonnie weren't coming back, but she wouldn't allow it. No one could fill the spot of her best friends, even if she had to compel someone to get her way.
Maybe she was also holding out for them to come back. It wasn't their feelings for her, but constant torment of their daily lives that tore them away from her. Caroline had no control over it, no way to bring them back, but she still had hope that life would take them by surprise and everything would go back to the way it used to be; the way it was supposed to be. Maybe a miracle would happen, and what seemed impossible could be proven wrong once again.
Of course, as much as it killed her, this was one of the things that were completely out of her control.
Caroline mindlessly wandered over to one of the beds, one that was bare of any sheets or blankets, and slumped down onto the mattress, succumbing to theweight of silence that pressed down on her.
It didn't smell like Bonnie anymore. Even with her heightened senses, there was no trace of her scent that lingered and Caroline could feel the proof of Bonnie's existence slowly fade away.
Caroline wrapped her arms around her middle and started to cry.
Growing up, she realized now more than ever, she spent entirely too much time not fully appreciating the friendship Bonnie offered her. She would get jealous about stupid things, pick fights, and made ridiculous accusations that she was a terrible friend. Yet, whenever Caroline would eventually come to her senses and stop being so hostile, Bonnie was always there; always willing to forgive her. Caroline let her insecurities get in the way of her best friend, and now her constant presence was no longer there.
Her red eyes stung as tears continued to pour out of them, and she closed them tightly, willing the pain to go away. They say the time heals all wounds, but with each day she felt herself getting further and further from being okay.
When Bonnie woke up, she was greeted with the sight of a foot an inch or two from her face. She looked across the couch and there was Caroline's head poking out from the covers at the other end. Bonnie tried to wiggle her way out without waking up her friend, but the moment she started to move, Caroline jerked awake and accidentally kicked Bonnie hard in the nose.
"Ow! Caroline!" Bonnie managed to yell through the throbbing pain. When she shoved her foot away, she did it with a little too much force, sending Caroline toppling over the side of the couch where she landed on the girl laying on the floor next to them. "Sorry!" Bonnie exclaimed.
Elena let out a tired groan as Caroline got off of her.
Bonnie looked at her two friends on the ground. Both were younger than she remembered, maybe 8 or 9. Judging by the state of her living room, empty cups and candy wrappers littering the coffee table, and the popcorn that scattered across the floor, she knew that this must be the morning after one of their "epic" sleepovers, as Caroline liked to put it.
"We should probably clean up before your father wakes up, huh?" Caroline grumbled.
"That would be a good idea." Bonnie agreed.
Caroline leaned over Elena and tried to shake her awake. "Come on, Elena. You need to get your butt up and help us."
"Noooooooo…." Elena took a pillow and crushed it over her head, blocking out the sound. "Sleep." She moaned, but Caroline simply yanked the pillow off her head despite her annoyed protests. "Fine. I'm up."
Each of them took a job. Caroline picked up the floor, Elena cleared the coffee table of the wrappers and brought the dishes to the kitchen, and Bonnie took care of the blankets and pillows by folding them up and carrying them back to her bedroom.
Walking into her old bedroom was like walking into a time capsule. Every object she came across was something that she thought she had forgotten long ago, but each brought on another wave of nostalgia that made her smile. Memories flashed through her mind as she picked up an old notebook from her second grade class and leafed through, snickering at the little doodles in the margins. She threw it down next to the pile of blankets she left on the bed.
Next she moved over to her dresser and caught sight of her reflection in the mirror above it. Yep, she definitely hadn't reached puberty in this world yet. Before she turned away she took notice of a picture frame that still stood in her room 11 years later. It was a picture of Bonnie and her Grams. They were standing by a tree at her grandmother's house with Bonnie in front of her and the older woman's arms woven around her. The bright sun above them couldn't compare to the warmth in their smiles.
Bonnie stared closely at the image and remembered the last words her grams said to her.
"You're not the only member of this family who knows how to make a sacrifice."
"What does that mean?"
"It means I'm going to be fine. I found peace because I made sure you'd find yours."
"I don't understand."
"Not your concern. Just know I looked out for you. I love you Bonnie. You stay strong."
With those words replaying in her head for the millionth time since they were brought out of the other side, Bonnie was only further convinced that this was her grams' doing. Looking over the way she protectively held her in the picture, there was no question that she would do everything in her power to make sure that she would be safe.
Now was the time. She was finally in a world where her grams was there to provide the answers to what was going on with her and Damon.
No sign of them yet. Still looking. Will text when I find them.
Stefan read the text over and over again, each time his hope diminishing little by little and the persistent voice in his head growing louder and louder.
"Seven bottles of beer on the wall, seven bottles of beer." The voice sang from the corner of the motel room, getting on his last nerve. "Take one down, pass it around. Six bottles of beer on the wall."
Damon had been going on like that for the past couple of hours, and for a while Stefan was able to block it out, but now it was becoming more than he could take. "Could you stop that?" Stefan barked.
"Just let me finish this six-pack. Six bottles of beer on the beer on the wall…"
Stefan finally clicked off his cellphone and stuffed in his pocket. "I'm done, so you can go away now."
"You don't want me hangin' around here, so that's exactly why am." With his legs draped over one arm of the chair he lounged back against the other, his hands clasped together behind his head. "Isn't that the way it goes, Stef? Who would I be if I didn't continue to haunt your eternal existence? Certainly not the infuriating older brother you spent decades trying to avoid."
"That's the thing." He turned around to face the image of his brother. "You're not him. My brother is dead and you are just a figment of my imagination."
"Poor psychotic Stefan." Damon mocked, protruding his lower lip in a pout.
"Stop it." He said with as much restraint as he could manage, trying to hide any sign that Damon was getting to him.
"I wonder if there's a mental institution nearby."
"I said stop it."
"I can make a few calls. See if they take centuries old vampires who have a tendency to rip people limb from-" Before he could get out the last word, Stefan let his sudden anger get the better of him and threw an empty glass in his direction, but all he hit was air.
He disappeared and the room went silent again.
Stefan's eyes were fixed on the spot where imaginary Damon had been sitting, and he couldn't help but notice the empty feeling that rose in his chest. Yes, he didn't want to have the memory of his dead brother invading his life, but at the same time it was all he had, and as unhealthy as it was, he felt lost without it. He was falling deeper, deeper, deeper into the darkness and he couldn't pull himself out of it.
His resilience was crumbling in the silence. He needed to make some noise.
Later in the evening, Caroline had managed to pry herself out of bed and walk over to the window sill where she had left her cellphone. It was that time of the night where she would make her daily round of phone calls to her friends in hopes that she would get a response, any response. Normally even she would admit that calling everyday was a little excessive, but the fact that she rarely heard a peep from them left her unsettled.
Every once in a while she would get through to Elena, but she was always so glib about her whereabouts. She would say things like "I am just trying to keep busy" and the more Caroline pried her for more information, the less willing she was to give it.
She talked to Tyler a lot in the beginning. Caroline could tell that he was growing more and more frustrated withhis recent human status, and she suggested numerous times that maybe he should come to school. He would pass over the idea, saying that he needed to stay in a magic-free world for a while as he tried to adjust. Caroline could understand that and she wanted to help him through it in any way she could, but as time went on they were back to only exchanging voicemails and she couldn't help but feel like maybe he was starting to get annoyed with her.
And then there was Stefan. It was his radio silence that tore her up the most. No matter how many times she called, how many 5 minute long voicemails she left, or how many lengthy texts she sent, Caroline hadn't received a single word from him. Not knowing where he was, what he was doing, or how he was coping was driving her insane. Stefan was cutting her off and each day that passed without hearing from him made her feel more like she had lost him too. It was unbearable.
Caroline unlocked her cellphone to find that she hadn't missed any calls, as usual. There was, however, a notice saying that she had one text message waiting for her. It was from Matt.
Checking in on your mom today
Caroline let out an easy breath through her nose and a small smile stretched her lips. Thankfully, Matt was still keeping her updated. When Caroline was deciding whether or not to go back to school it was him who convinced her that it might be for the best. With guilt over not being able to enter Mystic Falls and help her mother through her recovery, she was hesitant to distance herself further from the small town. Matt was the one to tell her that being closer wouldn't change anything and that her mom wouldn't want her to take the time off, even if Caroline could be there. He assured her that he would take care of things back home and make sure she knew everything that was going on at home.
He kept his promise. He let Caroline know whenever there was a change in Liz's condition, he drove her to her physical therapy, some nights he even helped out around the house and made sure she had everything she needed. Matt was really going above and beyond what Caroline had expected. She was so grateful, she almost shed tears at the thought.
Wanting to know more about how her mother was doing today, Caroline eagerly called Matt's number.
"Hey, Matt. It's Caroline." She said, relieved that he had answered.
"I figured that when it was your name that showed up on my cell."
"Right, of course." She pressed the palm of her hand along her face and shook her head. "Anyway, I was wondering how things were going?"
"I actually just got back from your mom's."
"Really? How is she?"
"Getting a little annoyed with me hovering over her all the time. She insists she's fine, but I know how you wanted me to check in on her since you can't."
Caroline's smile grew wider and she took a moment to consider his generosity throughout the last few months. Out of all the horrible things that were happening to the people she loved, at least she knew that one of them was being taken care of. "Thank you Matt, for everything."
"It's the least I can do. Since I'm not much help with all the supernatural stuff, I can at least still make sure that your mom doesn't have to get through her recovery alone."
He always did this. He would downplay his contribution to the group based on the fact that he was human, but really he had no idea how valuable he was to all of them. No matter how hard he tried to keep himself away from it all, when they needed him, he was always there to lend any hand he could. No matter how much safer he was and how relieved he would be to not have to be mixed up in there life-and-death situations, it must be weird for him now that all of his friends, save for Tyler, were suddenly out of his life and without any knowledge of when they would be able to return, if ever. She could see how making a connection with her mother and -doing the most human thing he could do- help her through her difficult time could be good for him. It made him feel needed.
She was happy that he was able to find that, but she felt a little envious. She wanted to feel needed too.
"I wish I could be there for her. I wish I could help."
"She knows that and she understands. Don't be too hard on yourself, Care."
"I know, I know. I am just so used to being able to do something, and now that I can't…"
"I get it. Really, I do. But don't worry because we'll figure something out and you'll be here with your overly-positive attitude, getting your mom to her doctor appointments, cooking extravagant meals, and making sure she does her physical therapy. You know, bugging the crap out of her the same way I've been doing."
Caroline chuckled at that.
"Thanks again. You have no idea how much this means to me."
"You're welcome. I'll keep in touch."
When they hung up, Caroline stared at her phone, not yet willing to give up her connection to the outside world. She longed for it to ring again, to get some sort of sign that her other friends were okay. Instead there was nothing, so she clicked the screen off, placed it back on the window sill, and desperately searched for something to distract her fearful mind.
Stefan could feel his fangs tear further and further into the young girl's neck as he steadily drained the warm blood from her body. Her screams did nothing to subside his gluttonous hunger and make him realize the terror he was inflicting. Instead it awakened the demon inside him that demanded more with each gulp he took.
"Hey there, Stef. Easy." The voice was back again, just as he knew it would be. But it wasn't as taunting or needling as it was before. Now it was calm and filled with concern. Stefan detached his mouth from the girl's neck, still holding onto her shoulders to keep her from running, and looked at his brother's pained expression through the darkness of the alleyway.
This is how it was. When Stefan was alone, the Damon that showed up was always trying to rattle him and break him out of any kind of peace he'd managed to obtain. He would push him to get mad, to fight back, and eventually Stefan would wind up losing his control. Then there was the other Damon. The one that told him to take a step back and think more logically; the one that could see him teetering over the edge and was there to stop him from falling off of it. It was like the common tale of having an angel and devil on each shoulder, but instead of it being versions of his own conscience, it was versions of his dead brother.
Stefan growled as the black veins bulged from his face and the fierce hunger decided to win over his restraint. When Stefan moved to bite down into her neck Damon's voice stopped him once again. "Damn it, Stefan. Do you really think I died so you could go back to chewing off peoples' heads?"
He'd said it numerous times over the last few months and it got through to him, just as it always did.
Stefan looked at the girl's face. Her crying was weakening as her body began to give out, and there was a distinct lack of color in her face but -luckily-she was still conscious. Damon got through to him just in time.
Stefan bit down into his own wrist and let a few drops of blood enter the girl's mouth. Next, he held her by the face and stared into her green eyes that were bloodshot and filled with tears.
"I want you to forget what happened here. All you need to know is that you have to get away from me as quickly and as far as possible. Do you understand me?"
She nodded, and the moment he let go of her, she ran around the corner and out of sight. Guilt ridden, yet at the same time relieved, Stefan pressed his back against the brick wall and sunk to the ground.
"You know that if you don't get it together soon, one day that little humanity switch is gonna get way too tempting and you'll flip it off. You know that there will be no coming back from it this time."
Damon spoke the truth. His mind drifted back to what Damon said about the hope of returning to his brother being the only thing keeping him from turning off his humanity as he was being tortured by the Augustines. But Stefan's own hope of seeing his brother again was fading, his sanity was gone, and the desire to give in to his vampire nature was all too powerful. He didn't even have Lexi to whip him back into shape and focus his reason for living elsewhere.
He needed a tether. He needed something, or someone, to keep him grounded because he couldn't do it by himself anymore.
He pulled the phone from his pocket and hit #1 on his speed dial. She answered after the first ring.
"Oh my god, Stefan? Are you really calling me?" She started desperately from the moment she picked up.
He was silent for a moment, debating whether or not that this was a good idea but, as much as he didn't want to bring her into this and have her see what he had become, just hearing her voice stirred a deeper longing in him that he tried to repress from the moment he left her. He knew now, she was what he needed to pull him back.
"I need you. Can you come meet me?"
A/N: Alright, there is chapter 3! I can't promise when the next chapter will come. I might be without internet for a while, so without the added distraction it might force me to write more. We shall see!
Anyway, hope you enjoyed this update. Thanks! If you could leave a review, it would be very much appreciated! :)
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