One step closer

[theshaw]

Friday, Jan 27th at 12:00 noon, I'll be meeting with...

DR. KING KWONG






????

for a consultation/diagnosis of my rare skin condition "Palmar Hyperhidrosis."

If all goes well, he'll take a good look at my hands and say "Yeah that shit's sweaty," write a letter of recommendation/diagnosis to my insurance company, perform Thoracic Sympathectomy on one of my Intercostal Veins, and I'll wake up with dry, normal hands; something you brats have been taking for granted your entire life. Hopefully, my brother Tom, who also suffers severely from this terrible condition, will be able to do the same, and we can high-five each other brothers-are-friends style with no cold wet-hand backlash.

Things I look forward to do in the near future (hopefully):

• Not having to wipe off my Pop'n/IIDX/Guitar Hero/Dualshock controller after each use.
• Shaking hands with family/friends/Job interviewers with complete confidence.
• Not having to clean out my keyboard keys.
• Writing a school paper/filling out a scan-tron sheet without smudging ink/lead all over my hand and the paper.
• Not slipping off the ITG bar when trying to pass 10 footers (man was that embarassing).
• Being able to hold hands with a significant other without being conscious of the profuse sweating.
• Having no wrinkles on the sleeves of my shirt/thigh region of my pants(I won't have to use them to absorb the sweat any longer).
• Being able to use a pencil/pen that doesn't have a leather grip.
• Driving with a firm grip on the wheel
• Lifting things without the worry of it slipping away from my hands.
• Leaving desks in school puddle-free.
• Etc.

I also hear foot-sweat (which I don't care nearly as much about) is also restricted from this gland, so maybe I'll be able to remove DRY socks from my feet, and walk around bare-footed comfortably.

::crosses wet fingers::