They Call me Buzz....KILLAH.

[theserp]

Man..........what in the hell is wrong with me? It feels like, I've forgotten how to have fun or something. Maybe it's because I've been on nothing but the receiving end of "mental beatdowns" as of recent memory...but I can't seem to put my finger on it

Comments

[mentalcalamity]

Coming from a 19 year old "emo" lesbian female, this may not mean all that much, but seeing as how I feel about in the same boat as you, I think maybe my ideas may be of some comfort?
I have this theory that we all go through phases in life where things that once brought us joy and comfort just DONT. Right now, for me, it's the "gay community" that I had become so accustomed to up in college. For seven months, they did nothing but bring me joy and happiness, but now my skin crawls everytime I think about having to spend time with them.
And things that once brought me general angst, such as standing up and taking control of something, are now bringing me a lot of joy. I'm not saying that work was ever angsty like for you, but it probably wasn't nearly as enjoyable for you as the nightclub community.
So, instead of concentrating on the fact that it doesn't bring you joy anymore, my advice would be to concentrate on what DOES. Give it time, and I bet your life will start feeling complete and "normal" again.
I say "normal" because what life really is ever normal?
Sorry if this doesn't help much, but either way, keep it strong.
And hope your nightclubbing urge comes back, because I come home for summer in less than a month, haha.