[multi-part] Feed On Me: Something
Title: Feed On Me: Something
Pairing: Yamada x Yuto
Rating/Warnings: NC-17; vampires, biting, mild bondage
Word Count: 3569
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, and only the words are mine.
Summary: This is the fourth installement of the Feed on Me Series, it comes after Feed on Me, Everything and Anything, though the only thing you'll miss out on by not reading the others is a little bit of vampire lore.
A/N: Set around the filming of Grasshopper
“Please.” Yuto gasps wildly, the sound going straight to Yamada's cock. “Please, Ryosuke, I'm so close.”. Yamada's cock throbs where it's jutting, achingly hard, from his body and Yuto sticks up his left hand, holding it out to Yamada.
Yamada nods slightly and he slides slowly down Yuto's cock again making Yuto cry out in desperation. He takes Yuto's offered hand and presses it against his face, rubbing his cheek into it momentarily before turning his face to press his nose against Yuto's wrist. His mouth is watering. So close.
He takes Yuto's other hand, pulling it into his own lap and Yuto's hand wraps obediently around his cock, trembling as Yamada strokes it slowly up and down. Almost. He closes his eyes, concentrating on just the scent of Yuto's blood and the feeling of pleasure spreading through him, waiting for the perfect moment. He parts his lips, feeling saliva dripping down his chin as he teases himself just a moment longer and then bites into Yuto's skin. The last thing he hears is Yuto's wail before he falls into frenzied bliss.
It's Yuto that started calling it 'The Frenzy', it terrified them both in the start but Yuto understands it better now, better than Yamada does. The frenzy is that brief period, from the moment he tastes blood to the moment he comes, when Yamada is un-reachably gone.
It can only have been seconds, he thinks when he's back to himself again, but Yamada has no memory of them, only the lingering feeling of overwhelming pleasure. Still, those few seconds were long enough for him to have torn gashes into Yuto's wrist and his body jerks with the overload of sensation as he carefully licks them clean, closing the cuts with his tongue.
As soon as he's done, Yuto pulls him down into a kiss, un-phased as usual by the taste of his own blood on Yamada's lips. Yamada kisses back, deep kisses that are unhurried and it could be hours before Yuto pushes him back softly. “We should get cleaned up before I fall asleep.” Yuto says with a sated smile, one that looks half gone already - even when Yamada doesn't drink enough to knock Yuto unconscious, it still tires him out, that could be the sex too though. Yamada nods a little and lifts up enough for Yuto's cock to slide out of him, sticky release following it, but when he attempts to move back further Yuto grabs his necklace and pulls him back down with a whine of protest. “I don't want to stop kissing you though.” and he does just that, a few long presses against Yamada's lips.
Yamada can't keep the doting smile off of his face when eventually he pulls back again. He doesn't want to stop kissing either, he could kiss Yuto forever he thinks. “You can kiss me in the shower can't you?”
It's late enough that Yuto's family are already in bed, so Yamada doesn't even bother dressing them before making use of his vampire strength and speed - lifting Yuto into his arms and darting along the hall to the bathroom.
Yuto kisses him some more as they wait for the water to heat up, and then more as they fumble backwards into the shower stall. He's still kissing Yamada when Yamada reaches for the shower gel, lathering it up in his hands before sliding them all over Yuto's body. Yuto is still kissing him as he returns the gesture.
Yamada fights him off as soon as he feels Yuto smiling into their kiss, but the soapy hands are already at his sides, tickling softly until Yamada is shaking with silent laughter, his feet making squeaking noises against the shower floor as he twists about in Yuto's hold.
When Yuto finally relents he's panting, his face alive with laughter, his black hair soaked and flopping gracefully into his face. If Yamada had breath, the sight would knock it from him. Quite what reaction it stirs instead he isn't sure, but it makes Yuto's expression slowly sober into something serious and thoughtful.
“You look at me like I'm the centre of the universe or something...” Yuto says, as though the idea of that is ridiculous, Yamada doesn't tell him that he is, that he's far more than that, that there aren't words for what Yuto is to him.
“Or something.” he agrees instead, swallowing heavily as he holds Yuto's intense gaze, and then he leans up onto his tip toes to kiss Yuto softly.
“You haven't fed properly in almost a week.” Yuto says half against Yamada's lips. “If you need to take some more, then it's alright...”
It has been almost a week, but the erection digging into Yamada's stomach tells him that this is about more than just if Yamada is well fed or not. He doesn't need to drink more blood, he's had enough to sustain him, but as he pulls back to look at Yuto properly, he can't deny that he wants it. Wants more than just Yuto's blood, he wants all of him. Yamada doesn't say that either, just nods and leans back up, pressing their mouths together.
Holding Yuto up against the shower wall shouldn't work with his height, but Yamada is strong enough, and Yuto's impossibly gangly legs are long enough to support him against the opposite wall as Yamada thrusts into him roughly. It's Yuto that bites into his wrist this time, to hold back his cries Yamada knows, as he opens his mouth to bare his fangs, and this time Yamada goes for his neck.
~~~~~
The scent of Yuto's blood hits him suddenly and for just a moment he slips, his head twitches to the side a fraction as he inhales, the breath a low growl on its way back out.
"Cut" the director yells and the voice snaps Yamada back to reality. "Fantastic, really great expressions Yamada-san, I really got the feeling that you were crazy there.”
He really was crazy there, just for a moment. It's been weeks since he fed properly, it's the longest he's gone, his biggest challenge, only made more challenging by Yuto's presence.
He's glad that the crazy transferred into film though, that was the whole point of this challenge - to get into Semi's head by making himself even a fraction of Semi's crazy. Yuto had been against the idea of course. “Are you crazy?” had been his first question, and when Yamada had explained that no, he wasn't, and that was the problem, he'd continued. “But you're a brilliant actor, you don't need to actually be crazy to play crazy.”
Yamada knows he's a good actor, but it's not about playing the part, it's about feeling the part, about really understanding it, that's what Yamada loves about acting. The fact that he can use this affliction of his to help with that is the silver lining. “This will be the first time that I might actually gain something out of being what I am.” Yamada had tried to explain only for Yuto to pout and ask.
“The first time you've gained something?”
“The second time.” Yamada had corrected himself, leaning up just a few centimetres to kiss Yuto's nose, only to follow it with a kiss on his lips. Hours later Yuto would concede that it could be useful, but Yamada had had to promise Yuto could see him every single day, just to make sure he really was holding it together.
The irony is that when Yuto is around is when Yamada feels the least like he's holding it together. He craves blood, any blood, but he's only ever tasted Yuto's, Yuto's blood has been everything he's needed, he needs is it, needs it more now when he's so thirsty and Yuto is so warm and here and...
“Yamada-san?” The director calls again. “Shall we check it?”
Yamada plasters on his idol smile and bows shyly before half jogging over to the screen. It's feels strange to him, to try and hold a character, a perfect shining idol character while he watches the real him on the screen.
He can see the moment it happens, the moment he catches the scent, he looks strangely distracted while somehow being entirely focused. It still burns, every second threatening to snap him again. When the director nods that the scene is fine Yamada feels a wave of relief, he's far from finished but it's everything for the day.
Tracking Yuto isn't hard, there might as well be bright neon signs pointing right at him for how overwhelming his blood smells. “Good work today.” Yuto whispers, casting a furtive glance around before pulling Yamada into a quick hug.
Yamada inhales deeply and instantly regrets it, just the barest contact and he's already aroused. “You need to leave...”
“I am...you're leaving too right? You're done?” Yuto asks back lightly, he doesn't understand.
Yamada shakes his head but counters the action with words, stepping back out of Yuto's hold because there are people moving around them now, the crew packing up. Yamada is glad that Semi wears loose pants. “I mean I am done...I just, can't hang out tonight...”
Yuto frowns at him, the expression only deepening as Yamada takes another involuntary breath and shudders. “Ryosuke, you're still in control right? You've got this?”
“Yeah” Yamada nods quickly. “I'm doing OK, it's just you...I don't think I can hold back around you...I'm not used to having to hold back around you and if I have to see you every day for the next five days I'm not going to make it.” Yamada tries to explain.
“Then stop trying.” Yuto says seriously. “You've pushed yourself far enough.”
Yamada closes his eyes and shakes his head. “I've got it under control, I swear...” and he lowers his voice even further. “I just want you so badly...in every way, I'm not used to going so long without...anything...from you...and seeing how hot you look, how good you smell, it only makes everything harder.” He'd have commented on the accidental pun if he weren't feeling so strained already, Yuto gets it that much though.
“Phone calls...” Yuto says sternly with a nod. “When you wake up, when you get to work, on your lunch break, on bathroom breaks, when you finish, when you get home and before you go to bed. If I don't get to see you myself to judge your condition then I need you to tell me how you're doing every chance you get.” Yamada opens his mouth to protest but Yuto shakes his head. “You know what's at stake here...if you hurt someone because you can't control yourself then it's as much my fault as is it yours...”
Yamada understands, and with a small nod he concedes “OK. Promise.”
“And...” Yuto continues, “As soon as you're done on Saturday you come straight to my place. I'll bribe my family out for the evening and we get you back, alright?”
Yamada nods, and breathes slowly. “OK go...I need to sort myself out...”
It's a little easier with Yuto out of smelling range, but it only gets harder as the days pass. Without Yuto's scent for comparison everyone else only smells more and more enticing. It's a tease, being around them all, working with hot pulsing bodies and cold, fake splashes of red that taunt him with how realistic they look. Every day gets that little bit harder, but eventually Saturday comes.
He has to play the idol again once more as he reaches his crank down, but then he's home free. He showers in hyper speed, surprising his co-stars as he darts back out of the showers before they're even in, laughing out something about concerts and costume changes and then he's dressed and making his way to Yuto's.
It's so much worse with Yuto so close, it's better and it's worse because he can finally drink only he's so close to falling he doesn't know if he can wait until it's time. He's burning, which is strange because usually he feels colder the longer he goes without blood, but now he's on fire, his skin sticky with sweat as he pants stale air that doesn't soothe him, it only makes him taste Yuto in the space between them.
“Ryosuke?” Yuto says softly, his palm resting against Yamada's cheek, the contact sends a jolt of sensation through his entire body, making his cock throb. “Ryosuke?” Yuto says again with a little more concern in his voice, his hand gently patting Yamada's cheek.
He tries to look up at Yuto's face but his eyes won't focus, Yuto's scent is stinging his nostrils, choking him, he can't look away from the blood pulsing in Yuto's neck. Yuto leans in to kiss his lips softly and it takes everything that's left in him to keep his mouth clamped shut, protecting Yuto from his teeth. Yuto's lips are so soft, so gentle and Yamada wants nothing more than to just tear into them.
His hand flies out, pushing Yuto back just a little too hard, across to the other side of the room where Yuto lays sprawled on the floor looking at him in anything but surprise. If he's scared then that doesn't show either, he gets to his feet and starts back towards Yamada who emits a low, trembling growl in warning.
Then finally the noise they've been waiting for, the front door closing as Yuto's parents head out for the evening with his brother. The sound of it echoes through the tension between them and then Yuto starts moving again.
“This is a bad idea.” Yamada manages to stutter, the smell of Yuto's anticipation, his arousal, only driving Yamada even wilder. “I don't think I can control myself.”
Yuto still isn't surprised, it's as though he expected exactly this. “You don't need to, let me be in control...”
“Yuto...” Yamada protests, because Yamada isn't always the dominant one, sometimes Yuto takes the lead, spoiling him, teasing him, fucking him, but it's only until the demon inside him takes over, then the demon is in control.
Yuto smiles as though he expected this too and he reaches under his pillow and pulls out a set of handcuffs. They're not ordinary ones, they're thick and clunky, dark grey and very old looking, with an odd shape to them. “Iron shackles, they'll hold you.” Yuto explains.
Yamada knows he should argue, to insist that Yuto can't know they're strong enough to hold him but the idea of Yuto chaining him up sends more jolts to his groin, inflaming his arousal. He shouldn't, but he nods.
Yuto pulls off Yamada's T-shirt and pulls his arms behind his back, Yamada's arms only protest a little and the there's a metallic click. He pulls against the restraints to test them, and they're stronger even than they look, but Yamada doesn't even have time to say that much before Yuto is climbing into his lap and pushing him down onto the bed.
“I won't tease you.” Yuto says softly into his lips, then he presses a few quick kisses against them before moving away. “You've done so well to hold out this long, but it's almost over I promise.” and he moves back only far enough to push down his own sweatpants and boxers before repeating the action on Yamada. Yamada's body writhes as even the cool air feels good against his burning skin, he shudders as Yuto shoves off one leg of his clothes and swings the bare leg over him, cock hard and leaking. “I've been ready for you all day, I think I want this just as badly as you do.”
Yuto has barely sunk down onto him before he's pulling a kitchen knife from his bedside drawer. It's too soon, it's far too soon Yamada thinks, shaking his head quickly, only it's not soon enough, he's been desperate for this taste for weeks. As the knife slices into Yuto's palm, Yamada feels it along every single nerve, it's too much to bear, the need making his body thrash, desire and recklessness and then Yuto's bloody hand clamps over his mouth.
The harsh cry that had accompanied his ejaculation is still ringing in the air around him when he comes back to himself and then it drops suddenly as time itself stops. Yamada freezes, his empty breath knocked out of him.
There's blood everywhere, pooling on the floor by Yuto's head and shoulders, soaked through his torn shirt and drenching Yamada's neck and chest. Yuto is motionless, face down on the floor, his back and shoulders just a mangled mess as his heart pumps blood weakly from the open wounds.
“Yuto.” Yamada says soundlessly, a hand reaching out to touch Yuto's head and that's when he notices the shackle still dangling from his wrist, the other wrist is still shackled too, but a short length of heavy iron chain hangs from it.
~~~~~
“He was trying to make dinner.” Yamada lies flatly to Yuto's mother, he can't even look into her tear-swollen eyes. “The knife slipped and he cut his palm...there was so much...so much blood” he stutters, the true horror of it choking him “He panicked...and he passed out, I think...I didn't see...I was looking for a towel but...there was a bang and then he was on the floor and I...” he's close to tears again himself, he's a monster, he doesn't deserve the light squeeze of Yuto's mothers hands on his or her gentle, reassuring words.
“You poor thing, it must have been terrifying...here sit down, have some tea.”
Yamada does sit down, sagging into the cold, plastic seat of the hospital waiting room, and he takes the bottle of iced tea that she offers him, taking a sip just to be polite. It slides down easily, weeks of painful scratching with every swallow soothed in an instant with the remedy of Yuto's blood.
He's saved from any more small talk when a doctor re-appears. “He's doing just fine.” the doctor announces. “He seems to have lost a lot of blood, and that coupled with his anaemia made him pass out, hitting his head hard. He's now conscious and though we'll run some tests in the morning, we don't see there being any lasting head trauma. We've given him a blood transfusion and will prescribe iron for the anaemia and we've scheduled a surgery for his hand tomorrow afternoon.”
“Surgery?” Yamada asks, getting up quickly from his seat.
“It's quite a deep wound and hands are so easy to damage...” the doctor answers him, looking first at Yuto's mother. “The surgeon suspects that there is some nerve and muscle damage that will need to be repaired.”
Yamada's heart sinks, he could have closed the wound in an instant, his saliva's healing properties mending everything but to make the story believable Yuto had to have a wound, a genuine cut. Yamada didn't realise it could have possibly been this bad. “Will it...” Yamada starts but he doesn't know how to ask, he doesn't know if he wants to hear the answer.
Yuto's mother clearly does, and she continues the question for him. “Will there be any lasting damage? My son is a drummer...”
The doctor looks uneasy. “It's unlikely that he'll lose use of the hand all together but beyond that I can't make any promises. Our surgeon is one of the best in the country but until we know the extent of the damage...” he pauses for a moment as they take it in. “You can go through and see him now, he's very weak and tired so try to remain calm”
“You go ahead first.” Yamada tells Yuto's mother, and he bows at his father and brother too.
“Don't be silly, come along with us.” Yuto's mother insists and Yamada kind of wants to go, wants to see Yuto as soon as physically possible but he can't, he can't go in there with Yuto's family, sit beside them and wish Yuto a speedy recovery when they don't know he's the reason Yuto is even there.
“I...” Yamada starts lamely, his voice thick with shame. “I need a few minutes...please...go ahead.”
Part of him wants to leave as soon as they've closed the door to Yuto's room, there's no reason Yuto should even want to see him, but he can't just leave it like that either so instead he sits and waits.
“He asked after you.” Yuto's brother tells him almost an hour later when Yuto's family leave for the night and Yamada nods slowly, and gets to his feet.
There are so many things he has planned to say, so many apologies, so much self-deprecating but when he sees Yuto laying there looking so tired, so small, he can't say anything at all. Instead he drops into the seat by Yuto's bed.
“Hey.” Yuto says quietly and Yamada can't stop either his tears or his smile when Yuto offers a weak smile of his own. Yamada is just so happy that Yuto is alright, he hasn't been that scared in years, he hasn't felt that alone. But Yuto is here, he's smiling, lifting a hand covered in tubes to stroke the moisture from Yamada's cheeks, his eyes shining with nothing but love.
“You look at me like I'm the centre of the universe or something...” Yamada says thickly.
“Or something.” Yuto replies.
Pairing: Yamada x Yuto
Rating/Warnings: NC-17; vampires, biting, mild bondage
Word Count: 3569
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, and only the words are mine.
Summary: This is the fourth installement of the Feed on Me Series, it comes after Feed on Me, Everything and Anything, though the only thing you'll miss out on by not reading the others is a little bit of vampire lore.
A/N: Set around the filming of Grasshopper
“Please.” Yuto gasps wildly, the sound going straight to Yamada's cock. “Please, Ryosuke, I'm so close.”. Yamada's cock throbs where it's jutting, achingly hard, from his body and Yuto sticks up his left hand, holding it out to Yamada.
Yamada nods slightly and he slides slowly down Yuto's cock again making Yuto cry out in desperation. He takes Yuto's offered hand and presses it against his face, rubbing his cheek into it momentarily before turning his face to press his nose against Yuto's wrist. His mouth is watering. So close.
He takes Yuto's other hand, pulling it into his own lap and Yuto's hand wraps obediently around his cock, trembling as Yamada strokes it slowly up and down. Almost. He closes his eyes, concentrating on just the scent of Yuto's blood and the feeling of pleasure spreading through him, waiting for the perfect moment. He parts his lips, feeling saliva dripping down his chin as he teases himself just a moment longer and then bites into Yuto's skin. The last thing he hears is Yuto's wail before he falls into frenzied bliss.
It's Yuto that started calling it 'The Frenzy', it terrified them both in the start but Yuto understands it better now, better than Yamada does. The frenzy is that brief period, from the moment he tastes blood to the moment he comes, when Yamada is un-reachably gone.
It can only have been seconds, he thinks when he's back to himself again, but Yamada has no memory of them, only the lingering feeling of overwhelming pleasure. Still, those few seconds were long enough for him to have torn gashes into Yuto's wrist and his body jerks with the overload of sensation as he carefully licks them clean, closing the cuts with his tongue.
As soon as he's done, Yuto pulls him down into a kiss, un-phased as usual by the taste of his own blood on Yamada's lips. Yamada kisses back, deep kisses that are unhurried and it could be hours before Yuto pushes him back softly. “We should get cleaned up before I fall asleep.” Yuto says with a sated smile, one that looks half gone already - even when Yamada doesn't drink enough to knock Yuto unconscious, it still tires him out, that could be the sex too though. Yamada nods a little and lifts up enough for Yuto's cock to slide out of him, sticky release following it, but when he attempts to move back further Yuto grabs his necklace and pulls him back down with a whine of protest. “I don't want to stop kissing you though.” and he does just that, a few long presses against Yamada's lips.
Yamada can't keep the doting smile off of his face when eventually he pulls back again. He doesn't want to stop kissing either, he could kiss Yuto forever he thinks. “You can kiss me in the shower can't you?”
It's late enough that Yuto's family are already in bed, so Yamada doesn't even bother dressing them before making use of his vampire strength and speed - lifting Yuto into his arms and darting along the hall to the bathroom.
Yuto kisses him some more as they wait for the water to heat up, and then more as they fumble backwards into the shower stall. He's still kissing Yamada when Yamada reaches for the shower gel, lathering it up in his hands before sliding them all over Yuto's body. Yuto is still kissing him as he returns the gesture.
Yamada fights him off as soon as he feels Yuto smiling into their kiss, but the soapy hands are already at his sides, tickling softly until Yamada is shaking with silent laughter, his feet making squeaking noises against the shower floor as he twists about in Yuto's hold.
When Yuto finally relents he's panting, his face alive with laughter, his black hair soaked and flopping gracefully into his face. If Yamada had breath, the sight would knock it from him. Quite what reaction it stirs instead he isn't sure, but it makes Yuto's expression slowly sober into something serious and thoughtful.
“You look at me like I'm the centre of the universe or something...” Yuto says, as though the idea of that is ridiculous, Yamada doesn't tell him that he is, that he's far more than that, that there aren't words for what Yuto is to him.
“Or something.” he agrees instead, swallowing heavily as he holds Yuto's intense gaze, and then he leans up onto his tip toes to kiss Yuto softly.
“You haven't fed properly in almost a week.” Yuto says half against Yamada's lips. “If you need to take some more, then it's alright...”
It has been almost a week, but the erection digging into Yamada's stomach tells him that this is about more than just if Yamada is well fed or not. He doesn't need to drink more blood, he's had enough to sustain him, but as he pulls back to look at Yuto properly, he can't deny that he wants it. Wants more than just Yuto's blood, he wants all of him. Yamada doesn't say that either, just nods and leans back up, pressing their mouths together.
Holding Yuto up against the shower wall shouldn't work with his height, but Yamada is strong enough, and Yuto's impossibly gangly legs are long enough to support him against the opposite wall as Yamada thrusts into him roughly. It's Yuto that bites into his wrist this time, to hold back his cries Yamada knows, as he opens his mouth to bare his fangs, and this time Yamada goes for his neck.
~~~~~
The scent of Yuto's blood hits him suddenly and for just a moment he slips, his head twitches to the side a fraction as he inhales, the breath a low growl on its way back out.
"Cut" the director yells and the voice snaps Yamada back to reality. "Fantastic, really great expressions Yamada-san, I really got the feeling that you were crazy there.”
He really was crazy there, just for a moment. It's been weeks since he fed properly, it's the longest he's gone, his biggest challenge, only made more challenging by Yuto's presence.
He's glad that the crazy transferred into film though, that was the whole point of this challenge - to get into Semi's head by making himself even a fraction of Semi's crazy. Yuto had been against the idea of course. “Are you crazy?” had been his first question, and when Yamada had explained that no, he wasn't, and that was the problem, he'd continued. “But you're a brilliant actor, you don't need to actually be crazy to play crazy.”
Yamada knows he's a good actor, but it's not about playing the part, it's about feeling the part, about really understanding it, that's what Yamada loves about acting. The fact that he can use this affliction of his to help with that is the silver lining. “This will be the first time that I might actually gain something out of being what I am.” Yamada had tried to explain only for Yuto to pout and ask.
“The first time you've gained something?”
“The second time.” Yamada had corrected himself, leaning up just a few centimetres to kiss Yuto's nose, only to follow it with a kiss on his lips. Hours later Yuto would concede that it could be useful, but Yamada had had to promise Yuto could see him every single day, just to make sure he really was holding it together.
The irony is that when Yuto is around is when Yamada feels the least like he's holding it together. He craves blood, any blood, but he's only ever tasted Yuto's, Yuto's blood has been everything he's needed, he needs is it, needs it more now when he's so thirsty and Yuto is so warm and here and...
“Yamada-san?” The director calls again. “Shall we check it?”
Yamada plasters on his idol smile and bows shyly before half jogging over to the screen. It's feels strange to him, to try and hold a character, a perfect shining idol character while he watches the real him on the screen.
He can see the moment it happens, the moment he catches the scent, he looks strangely distracted while somehow being entirely focused. It still burns, every second threatening to snap him again. When the director nods that the scene is fine Yamada feels a wave of relief, he's far from finished but it's everything for the day.
Tracking Yuto isn't hard, there might as well be bright neon signs pointing right at him for how overwhelming his blood smells. “Good work today.” Yuto whispers, casting a furtive glance around before pulling Yamada into a quick hug.
Yamada inhales deeply and instantly regrets it, just the barest contact and he's already aroused. “You need to leave...”
“I am...you're leaving too right? You're done?” Yuto asks back lightly, he doesn't understand.
Yamada shakes his head but counters the action with words, stepping back out of Yuto's hold because there are people moving around them now, the crew packing up. Yamada is glad that Semi wears loose pants. “I mean I am done...I just, can't hang out tonight...”
Yuto frowns at him, the expression only deepening as Yamada takes another involuntary breath and shudders. “Ryosuke, you're still in control right? You've got this?”
“Yeah” Yamada nods quickly. “I'm doing OK, it's just you...I don't think I can hold back around you...I'm not used to having to hold back around you and if I have to see you every day for the next five days I'm not going to make it.” Yamada tries to explain.
“Then stop trying.” Yuto says seriously. “You've pushed yourself far enough.”
Yamada closes his eyes and shakes his head. “I've got it under control, I swear...” and he lowers his voice even further. “I just want you so badly...in every way, I'm not used to going so long without...anything...from you...and seeing how hot you look, how good you smell, it only makes everything harder.” He'd have commented on the accidental pun if he weren't feeling so strained already, Yuto gets it that much though.
“Phone calls...” Yuto says sternly with a nod. “When you wake up, when you get to work, on your lunch break, on bathroom breaks, when you finish, when you get home and before you go to bed. If I don't get to see you myself to judge your condition then I need you to tell me how you're doing every chance you get.” Yamada opens his mouth to protest but Yuto shakes his head. “You know what's at stake here...if you hurt someone because you can't control yourself then it's as much my fault as is it yours...”
Yamada understands, and with a small nod he concedes “OK. Promise.”
“And...” Yuto continues, “As soon as you're done on Saturday you come straight to my place. I'll bribe my family out for the evening and we get you back, alright?”
Yamada nods, and breathes slowly. “OK go...I need to sort myself out...”
It's a little easier with Yuto out of smelling range, but it only gets harder as the days pass. Without Yuto's scent for comparison everyone else only smells more and more enticing. It's a tease, being around them all, working with hot pulsing bodies and cold, fake splashes of red that taunt him with how realistic they look. Every day gets that little bit harder, but eventually Saturday comes.
He has to play the idol again once more as he reaches his crank down, but then he's home free. He showers in hyper speed, surprising his co-stars as he darts back out of the showers before they're even in, laughing out something about concerts and costume changes and then he's dressed and making his way to Yuto's.
It's so much worse with Yuto so close, it's better and it's worse because he can finally drink only he's so close to falling he doesn't know if he can wait until it's time. He's burning, which is strange because usually he feels colder the longer he goes without blood, but now he's on fire, his skin sticky with sweat as he pants stale air that doesn't soothe him, it only makes him taste Yuto in the space between them.
“Ryosuke?” Yuto says softly, his palm resting against Yamada's cheek, the contact sends a jolt of sensation through his entire body, making his cock throb. “Ryosuke?” Yuto says again with a little more concern in his voice, his hand gently patting Yamada's cheek.
He tries to look up at Yuto's face but his eyes won't focus, Yuto's scent is stinging his nostrils, choking him, he can't look away from the blood pulsing in Yuto's neck. Yuto leans in to kiss his lips softly and it takes everything that's left in him to keep his mouth clamped shut, protecting Yuto from his teeth. Yuto's lips are so soft, so gentle and Yamada wants nothing more than to just tear into them.
His hand flies out, pushing Yuto back just a little too hard, across to the other side of the room where Yuto lays sprawled on the floor looking at him in anything but surprise. If he's scared then that doesn't show either, he gets to his feet and starts back towards Yamada who emits a low, trembling growl in warning.
Then finally the noise they've been waiting for, the front door closing as Yuto's parents head out for the evening with his brother. The sound of it echoes through the tension between them and then Yuto starts moving again.
“This is a bad idea.” Yamada manages to stutter, the smell of Yuto's anticipation, his arousal, only driving Yamada even wilder. “I don't think I can control myself.”
Yuto still isn't surprised, it's as though he expected exactly this. “You don't need to, let me be in control...”
“Yuto...” Yamada protests, because Yamada isn't always the dominant one, sometimes Yuto takes the lead, spoiling him, teasing him, fucking him, but it's only until the demon inside him takes over, then the demon is in control.
Yuto smiles as though he expected this too and he reaches under his pillow and pulls out a set of handcuffs. They're not ordinary ones, they're thick and clunky, dark grey and very old looking, with an odd shape to them. “Iron shackles, they'll hold you.” Yuto explains.
Yamada knows he should argue, to insist that Yuto can't know they're strong enough to hold him but the idea of Yuto chaining him up sends more jolts to his groin, inflaming his arousal. He shouldn't, but he nods.
Yuto pulls off Yamada's T-shirt and pulls his arms behind his back, Yamada's arms only protest a little and the there's a metallic click. He pulls against the restraints to test them, and they're stronger even than they look, but Yamada doesn't even have time to say that much before Yuto is climbing into his lap and pushing him down onto the bed.
“I won't tease you.” Yuto says softly into his lips, then he presses a few quick kisses against them before moving away. “You've done so well to hold out this long, but it's almost over I promise.” and he moves back only far enough to push down his own sweatpants and boxers before repeating the action on Yamada. Yamada's body writhes as even the cool air feels good against his burning skin, he shudders as Yuto shoves off one leg of his clothes and swings the bare leg over him, cock hard and leaking. “I've been ready for you all day, I think I want this just as badly as you do.”
Yuto has barely sunk down onto him before he's pulling a kitchen knife from his bedside drawer. It's too soon, it's far too soon Yamada thinks, shaking his head quickly, only it's not soon enough, he's been desperate for this taste for weeks. As the knife slices into Yuto's palm, Yamada feels it along every single nerve, it's too much to bear, the need making his body thrash, desire and recklessness and then Yuto's bloody hand clamps over his mouth.
The harsh cry that had accompanied his ejaculation is still ringing in the air around him when he comes back to himself and then it drops suddenly as time itself stops. Yamada freezes, his empty breath knocked out of him.
There's blood everywhere, pooling on the floor by Yuto's head and shoulders, soaked through his torn shirt and drenching Yamada's neck and chest. Yuto is motionless, face down on the floor, his back and shoulders just a mangled mess as his heart pumps blood weakly from the open wounds.
“Yuto.” Yamada says soundlessly, a hand reaching out to touch Yuto's head and that's when he notices the shackle still dangling from his wrist, the other wrist is still shackled too, but a short length of heavy iron chain hangs from it.
~~~~~
“He was trying to make dinner.” Yamada lies flatly to Yuto's mother, he can't even look into her tear-swollen eyes. “The knife slipped and he cut his palm...there was so much...so much blood” he stutters, the true horror of it choking him “He panicked...and he passed out, I think...I didn't see...I was looking for a towel but...there was a bang and then he was on the floor and I...” he's close to tears again himself, he's a monster, he doesn't deserve the light squeeze of Yuto's mothers hands on his or her gentle, reassuring words.
“You poor thing, it must have been terrifying...here sit down, have some tea.”
Yamada does sit down, sagging into the cold, plastic seat of the hospital waiting room, and he takes the bottle of iced tea that she offers him, taking a sip just to be polite. It slides down easily, weeks of painful scratching with every swallow soothed in an instant with the remedy of Yuto's blood.
He's saved from any more small talk when a doctor re-appears. “He's doing just fine.” the doctor announces. “He seems to have lost a lot of blood, and that coupled with his anaemia made him pass out, hitting his head hard. He's now conscious and though we'll run some tests in the morning, we don't see there being any lasting head trauma. We've given him a blood transfusion and will prescribe iron for the anaemia and we've scheduled a surgery for his hand tomorrow afternoon.”
“Surgery?” Yamada asks, getting up quickly from his seat.
“It's quite a deep wound and hands are so easy to damage...” the doctor answers him, looking first at Yuto's mother. “The surgeon suspects that there is some nerve and muscle damage that will need to be repaired.”
Yamada's heart sinks, he could have closed the wound in an instant, his saliva's healing properties mending everything but to make the story believable Yuto had to have a wound, a genuine cut. Yamada didn't realise it could have possibly been this bad. “Will it...” Yamada starts but he doesn't know how to ask, he doesn't know if he wants to hear the answer.
Yuto's mother clearly does, and she continues the question for him. “Will there be any lasting damage? My son is a drummer...”
The doctor looks uneasy. “It's unlikely that he'll lose use of the hand all together but beyond that I can't make any promises. Our surgeon is one of the best in the country but until we know the extent of the damage...” he pauses for a moment as they take it in. “You can go through and see him now, he's very weak and tired so try to remain calm”
“You go ahead first.” Yamada tells Yuto's mother, and he bows at his father and brother too.
“Don't be silly, come along with us.” Yuto's mother insists and Yamada kind of wants to go, wants to see Yuto as soon as physically possible but he can't, he can't go in there with Yuto's family, sit beside them and wish Yuto a speedy recovery when they don't know he's the reason Yuto is even there.
“I...” Yamada starts lamely, his voice thick with shame. “I need a few minutes...please...go ahead.”
Part of him wants to leave as soon as they've closed the door to Yuto's room, there's no reason Yuto should even want to see him, but he can't just leave it like that either so instead he sits and waits.
“He asked after you.” Yuto's brother tells him almost an hour later when Yuto's family leave for the night and Yamada nods slowly, and gets to his feet.
There are so many things he has planned to say, so many apologies, so much self-deprecating but when he sees Yuto laying there looking so tired, so small, he can't say anything at all. Instead he drops into the seat by Yuto's bed.
“Hey.” Yuto says quietly and Yamada can't stop either his tears or his smile when Yuto offers a weak smile of his own. Yamada is just so happy that Yuto is alright, he hasn't been that scared in years, he hasn't felt that alone. But Yuto is here, he's smiling, lifting a hand covered in tubes to stroke the moisture from Yamada's cheeks, his eyes shining with nothing but love.
“You look at me like I'm the centre of the universe or something...” Yamada says thickly.
“Or something.” Yuto replies.