[multi-part] Save Me (part 1)
Title: Save Me (part 1)
Pairing: Asou Haruto (1 Litre of Tears)/Sawada Shin (Gokusen)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1723
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything, the characters are both from dramas so all rights relating to the characters belong to the respective creators.
Summary: A new hospital, a new start, that's all he needs, or so he keeps telling himself.
Warnings: This takes place after the events of the '1 Litre of Tears' SP, so naturally there will be references/spoilers for the drama, and also some angsty/upsetting themes.
A/N: Written for lilly0 for the Fund-Raising Project for the Habagat Victims. There will be another part to this that I'm still in the process of writing, but I didn't want to leave you waiting for too long, so this seemed like a decent place to cut it at.
A new hospital, a new start, that's all he needs, or so he keeps telling himself.
~~~
“I'm Asou Haruto and I'm going to be starting work here today with The Department of Neurology.” He bows, smiles at his new colleagues, thanks them when they welcome him and then everything simmers down to it's usual pace.
He's already been given the tour, so he excuses himself, and wanders back along the corridor to his office. It's not as fancy as his old office, it's a little smaller for a start and he's going to be sharing with two other doctors. He has his own computer and filing cabinet though, and the laboratories downstairs, that he has unlimited access to, are very well equipped.
He won't be starting his research for real for a few weeks yet, most of it will be done using his patients and he doesn't want to start using them like guinea pigs until they know him well enough to know he isn't using them for his own selfish aims. It's not like any of this is really for him anyway.
~~~
He has seven patients under his care, it's a good number, it's not too many to handle but enough that he will be busy. He had more at his old hospital, but that was a much bigger place with a lot more staff, more nurses and physiotherapists to share the workload with. Here he'll be able to take a more active part in all aspects of his patients' care, that was the whole reason he wanted to move away from that place. It was the official reason at least.
“Are you OK sensei?”
He snaps from his daze, laughing a little at himself to ease the tension “Ah, I'm sorry, first day nerves I guess” and he flashes the young girl what he hopes is a reassuring smile.
His first patient is Erika, a sweet, bubbly girl of fourteen. The disease is still in the very early stages so for now she can still go to school, she can still take part in her after-school club activities as she normally would, for now she can still smile.
It almost breaks his heart to look at her, the way she smiles and nods as though she understands, how she tells him she's strong enough to accept it, but he's seen it before. Even the strongest person he's ever known, this disease brought even her to moments of weakness.
“We'll do everything we can to fight this, together” he says encouraging her “This can only beat you if you let it.”
She nods again, says she'll do her best, and then her parents are standing, thanking him profusely, shaking his hands, and then leading her from the room. With a shaky sigh to himself, he hopes that by beating this disease they didn't think he meant curing it, he's seen it many times already from different stages, he knows how this will end and no matter how hard he works. He knows it's already too late to save Erika, just like he was too late to save...her.
~~~
He spends his lunch alone on the roof of the hospital, staring up at the sky and he almost wants to curse it for looking so beautifully hopeful when people are suffering. It makes him feel terribly alone, and for the first time in the three weeks since he moved to this remote town, he wishes he had someone to talk to.
He knows exactly what Ako-chan would say if he told her that, she would say he wouldn't feel so lonely if he went down to the cafeteria where the rest of his colleagues are. And it's in that moment that he realises just how much he misses her.
She's been like a sister to him, a protective and over-bearing sister, despite the fact that he's older. He misses her parents too, he used to see them fairly often, visiting Ako-chan at work, or causing trouble for her she would claim. They always took the time to stop in and see him too, and he misses their smiling faces, the slight sadness in their eyes that he knows will never disappear, and it makes him feel a little less broken.
The door opens behind him and he's pulled from his thoughts. A quick glance tells him that he hasn't met this person yet, but judging from his clothes he knows that this strange man works here too.
The man sits down on some railing, just a few meters from him, and when Asou turns towards him he offers a quick nod but doesn't speak.
“Hi, I'm Asou, I just started working here today” he says after an uncomfortably long silence, and he walks over to where the man is digging into a sandwich.
“I know” he replies, glancing briefly up at Asou, and then away to the side.
He stands for a few minutes longer, not knowing what to say, but feeling awkward about standing silently so close to the other man. Eventually he sighs “I'd better get back to work.” and hastily he turns and walks towards the door.
“Sawada” the man calls after him, and for a moment he feels confused, “My name is Sawada”. He nods in understanding, but when the other man doesn't speak any further, he heads back inside.
~~~
He thinks nothing more about the man he met on the rooftop until his third day, it's been a long day already but the previous two have shown him that staying late at the office is better than going home to his lonely apartment.
He's filing through the days reports, updating his files on his patients, when he overhears some of the nurses wandering along the hall.
“So have you met Asou-sensei yet?” one of them giggles and the mention of his name sparks a little interest, but his curiosity is piqued further when the other nurse answers.
“He's really cute, and young too, but he's just...there's something about him. He's a lot like Sawada-kun.”
He pauses at that, what did she mean 'like Sawada-kun'?
The voices fade as they move further down the hallway, but he's left with that uncomfortable feeling of not getting the punchline of a joke. He could follow them and ask them what they mean, but firstly that would look a little creepy, and secondly he isn't familiar with everyone’s voices yet so he's not quite sure who it was that was speaking.
Instead he does the next creepiest thing he can think of, he loads up the staff profiles and searches for 'Sawada'. When the page pops up it certainly is the man from the roof, Sawada Shin, his name is, and Asou searches the rest of the page for a clue about how they're similar.
He sees nothing. It turns out Sawada isn't even really a doctor here, he's a University student studying medicine who just happens to be volunteering here in his free time. He guesses they could have meant that they’re similar in that they're both very dedicated to working, but then that didn't really fit the nurses' tone.
He looks for more clues but there's really not much more to see on his profile. He graduated high school with incredible grades but instead of going on to University he went abroad, to Africa, to help build schools and hospitals there. He spent a few years there it seems, first with the building and then helping out in one of the hospitals, before coming back to Japan and volunteering at hospitals in disaster stricken areas. Finally he moved a year earlier to this hospital, volunteering on evenings and weekends as he makes his way through his medical degree.
He lets out a sigh and scrolls back to the top of the page where the picture of Sawada stares back at him, it has that same aloof aura as the man himself had on the roof of the hospital, kind of cold and smug, only lacking the confidence of both. It's something in the eyes he thinks, something deep that is pulling him in, and he doesn't even realise how close he's moved to his screen when a voice behind him startles him.
“And people say I'm creepy.”
He recognises the voice, that lazy drawl, but his first thought is connected to the words 'Is that why they think I'm like you, do they really think I'm creepy?'
But in the next instant the situation hits him and he realises he's just been caught practically pressing his nose against a picture of another man, by said man himself. He scrambles to close the window, but he knows it's far too late.
“It's not what it looks like...” he stammers, turning to face Sawada, but he finds it strange that the first thing he notices is not the smug grin on his face, but how perfect his teeth are.
“If you want to know something about me then just ask...” Sawada grins.
And Asou has every intention of making some smart remark back but what leaves his lips instead is “Why do you want to become a doctor?” he doesn't know where the question came from, but Sawada looks as surprised by it as he is.
“To save people” Sawada answers but his voice sounds suddenly devoid of emotion and Asou is left unsatisfied with the answer. He's about to remark on that but Sawada speaks before he gets chance “Why did you want to become a doctor?”
So many images flash up at the same time that it's almost blinding, a tearful face with a bandage across her chin, that strange waddle-like walk that he never once found funny, her waving from the back of the family van, still smiling, the diaries, reading them aloud to her, and her desperate expression as he recited her plea 'Will I be able to get married?'. He wanted more than anything to fulfil her dream, but to ask her when he knew she was dying would have been shallow, it would have been meaningless, and taking away her one dream would be worse even than failing to save her.
He looks up, remembering that Sawada is waiting for an answer “To save...people” he finishes lamely, and when Sawada nods he understands.
Part 2
------------------------------------
The tone of this is actually pretty depressing, but given the characters and the situation that seemed most fitting to me, the next part will have some slightly lighter bits to it, and obviously a bit more development between Asou and Sawada. So...yeah, I hope this is ok for you :)
Pairing: Asou Haruto (1 Litre of Tears)/Sawada Shin (Gokusen)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1723
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything, the characters are both from dramas so all rights relating to the characters belong to the respective creators.
Summary: A new hospital, a new start, that's all he needs, or so he keeps telling himself.
Warnings: This takes place after the events of the '1 Litre of Tears' SP, so naturally there will be references/spoilers for the drama, and also some angsty/upsetting themes.
A/N: Written for lilly0 for the Fund-Raising Project for the Habagat Victims. There will be another part to this that I'm still in the process of writing, but I didn't want to leave you waiting for too long, so this seemed like a decent place to cut it at.
A new hospital, a new start, that's all he needs, or so he keeps telling himself.
~~~
“I'm Asou Haruto and I'm going to be starting work here today with The Department of Neurology.” He bows, smiles at his new colleagues, thanks them when they welcome him and then everything simmers down to it's usual pace.
He's already been given the tour, so he excuses himself, and wanders back along the corridor to his office. It's not as fancy as his old office, it's a little smaller for a start and he's going to be sharing with two other doctors. He has his own computer and filing cabinet though, and the laboratories downstairs, that he has unlimited access to, are very well equipped.
He won't be starting his research for real for a few weeks yet, most of it will be done using his patients and he doesn't want to start using them like guinea pigs until they know him well enough to know he isn't using them for his own selfish aims. It's not like any of this is really for him anyway.
~~~
He has seven patients under his care, it's a good number, it's not too many to handle but enough that he will be busy. He had more at his old hospital, but that was a much bigger place with a lot more staff, more nurses and physiotherapists to share the workload with. Here he'll be able to take a more active part in all aspects of his patients' care, that was the whole reason he wanted to move away from that place. It was the official reason at least.
“Are you OK sensei?”
He snaps from his daze, laughing a little at himself to ease the tension “Ah, I'm sorry, first day nerves I guess” and he flashes the young girl what he hopes is a reassuring smile.
His first patient is Erika, a sweet, bubbly girl of fourteen. The disease is still in the very early stages so for now she can still go to school, she can still take part in her after-school club activities as she normally would, for now she can still smile.
It almost breaks his heart to look at her, the way she smiles and nods as though she understands, how she tells him she's strong enough to accept it, but he's seen it before. Even the strongest person he's ever known, this disease brought even her to moments of weakness.
“We'll do everything we can to fight this, together” he says encouraging her “This can only beat you if you let it.”
She nods again, says she'll do her best, and then her parents are standing, thanking him profusely, shaking his hands, and then leading her from the room. With a shaky sigh to himself, he hopes that by beating this disease they didn't think he meant curing it, he's seen it many times already from different stages, he knows how this will end and no matter how hard he works. He knows it's already too late to save Erika, just like he was too late to save...her.
~~~
He spends his lunch alone on the roof of the hospital, staring up at the sky and he almost wants to curse it for looking so beautifully hopeful when people are suffering. It makes him feel terribly alone, and for the first time in the three weeks since he moved to this remote town, he wishes he had someone to talk to.
He knows exactly what Ako-chan would say if he told her that, she would say he wouldn't feel so lonely if he went down to the cafeteria where the rest of his colleagues are. And it's in that moment that he realises just how much he misses her.
She's been like a sister to him, a protective and over-bearing sister, despite the fact that he's older. He misses her parents too, he used to see them fairly often, visiting Ako-chan at work, or causing trouble for her she would claim. They always took the time to stop in and see him too, and he misses their smiling faces, the slight sadness in their eyes that he knows will never disappear, and it makes him feel a little less broken.
The door opens behind him and he's pulled from his thoughts. A quick glance tells him that he hasn't met this person yet, but judging from his clothes he knows that this strange man works here too.
The man sits down on some railing, just a few meters from him, and when Asou turns towards him he offers a quick nod but doesn't speak.
“Hi, I'm Asou, I just started working here today” he says after an uncomfortably long silence, and he walks over to where the man is digging into a sandwich.
“I know” he replies, glancing briefly up at Asou, and then away to the side.
He stands for a few minutes longer, not knowing what to say, but feeling awkward about standing silently so close to the other man. Eventually he sighs “I'd better get back to work.” and hastily he turns and walks towards the door.
“Sawada” the man calls after him, and for a moment he feels confused, “My name is Sawada”. He nods in understanding, but when the other man doesn't speak any further, he heads back inside.
~~~
He thinks nothing more about the man he met on the rooftop until his third day, it's been a long day already but the previous two have shown him that staying late at the office is better than going home to his lonely apartment.
He's filing through the days reports, updating his files on his patients, when he overhears some of the nurses wandering along the hall.
“So have you met Asou-sensei yet?” one of them giggles and the mention of his name sparks a little interest, but his curiosity is piqued further when the other nurse answers.
“He's really cute, and young too, but he's just...there's something about him. He's a lot like Sawada-kun.”
He pauses at that, what did she mean 'like Sawada-kun'?
The voices fade as they move further down the hallway, but he's left with that uncomfortable feeling of not getting the punchline of a joke. He could follow them and ask them what they mean, but firstly that would look a little creepy, and secondly he isn't familiar with everyone’s voices yet so he's not quite sure who it was that was speaking.
Instead he does the next creepiest thing he can think of, he loads up the staff profiles and searches for 'Sawada'. When the page pops up it certainly is the man from the roof, Sawada Shin, his name is, and Asou searches the rest of the page for a clue about how they're similar.
He sees nothing. It turns out Sawada isn't even really a doctor here, he's a University student studying medicine who just happens to be volunteering here in his free time. He guesses they could have meant that they’re similar in that they're both very dedicated to working, but then that didn't really fit the nurses' tone.
He looks for more clues but there's really not much more to see on his profile. He graduated high school with incredible grades but instead of going on to University he went abroad, to Africa, to help build schools and hospitals there. He spent a few years there it seems, first with the building and then helping out in one of the hospitals, before coming back to Japan and volunteering at hospitals in disaster stricken areas. Finally he moved a year earlier to this hospital, volunteering on evenings and weekends as he makes his way through his medical degree.
He lets out a sigh and scrolls back to the top of the page where the picture of Sawada stares back at him, it has that same aloof aura as the man himself had on the roof of the hospital, kind of cold and smug, only lacking the confidence of both. It's something in the eyes he thinks, something deep that is pulling him in, and he doesn't even realise how close he's moved to his screen when a voice behind him startles him.
“And people say I'm creepy.”
He recognises the voice, that lazy drawl, but his first thought is connected to the words 'Is that why they think I'm like you, do they really think I'm creepy?'
But in the next instant the situation hits him and he realises he's just been caught practically pressing his nose against a picture of another man, by said man himself. He scrambles to close the window, but he knows it's far too late.
“It's not what it looks like...” he stammers, turning to face Sawada, but he finds it strange that the first thing he notices is not the smug grin on his face, but how perfect his teeth are.
“If you want to know something about me then just ask...” Sawada grins.
And Asou has every intention of making some smart remark back but what leaves his lips instead is “Why do you want to become a doctor?” he doesn't know where the question came from, but Sawada looks as surprised by it as he is.
“To save people” Sawada answers but his voice sounds suddenly devoid of emotion and Asou is left unsatisfied with the answer. He's about to remark on that but Sawada speaks before he gets chance “Why did you want to become a doctor?”
So many images flash up at the same time that it's almost blinding, a tearful face with a bandage across her chin, that strange waddle-like walk that he never once found funny, her waving from the back of the family van, still smiling, the diaries, reading them aloud to her, and her desperate expression as he recited her plea 'Will I be able to get married?'. He wanted more than anything to fulfil her dream, but to ask her when he knew she was dying would have been shallow, it would have been meaningless, and taking away her one dream would be worse even than failing to save her.
He looks up, remembering that Sawada is waiting for an answer “To save...people” he finishes lamely, and when Sawada nods he understands.
Part 2
------------------------------------
The tone of this is actually pretty depressing, but given the characters and the situation that seemed most fitting to me, the next part will have some slightly lighter bits to it, and obviously a bit more development between Asou and Sawada. So...yeah, I hope this is ok for you :)