PART 3 - LOVE
LOVE
The exert from the book-
"ketut, why is life all crazy like this?" I asked my medicine man the next day. He replied, "Bhuta ia, dewa ia. " "What does that mean?" "Man is a demon, man is a god. Both true. " This was a familiar idea to me. It's very Indian, very Yogic. The notion is that human be- ings are born, as my Guru has explained many times, with the equivalent potential for both contraction and expansion. The ingredients of both darkness and light are equally present in all of us, and then it's up to the individual (or the family, or the society) to decide what will be brought forth--the virtues or the malevolence. The madness of this planet is largely a result of the human being's difficulty in coming into virtuous balance with himself. Lunacy (both collect- ive and individual) results. "So what can we do about the craziness of the world?" "Nothing. " Ketut laughed, but with a dose of kindness. "This is nature of world. This is des- tiny. Worry about your craziness only--make you in peace. " "But how should we find peace within ourselves?" I asked Ketut. "Meditation, " he said. "Purpose of meditation is only happiness and peace--very easy. Today I will teach a new meditation, make you even better person. Is called Four Brothers Meditation. " Ketut went on to explain that the Balinese believe we are each accompanied at birth by four invisible brothers, who come into the world with us and protect us throughout our lives. When the child is in the womb, her four siblings are even there with her--they are represen- ted by the placenta, the amniotic fluid, the umbilical cord and the yellow waxy substance that protects an unborn baby's skin. When the baby is born, the parents collect as much of these extraneous birthing materials as possible, placing them in a coconut shell and burying it by the front door of the family's house. According to the Balinese, this buried coconut is the holy resting place of the four unborn brothers, and that spot is tended to forever, like a shrine. The child is taught from earliest consciousness that she has these four brothers with her in the world wherever she goes, and that they will always look after her. The brothers inhabit the four virtues a person needs in order to be safe and happy in life: intelligence, friendship, strength and (I love this one) poetry. The brothers can be called upon in any critical situation for rescue and assistance. When you die, your four spirit brothers collect your soul and bring you to heaven. Today Ketut told me that he's never taught any Westerner the Four Brothers Meditation yet, but he thinks I am ready for it. First, he taught me the names of my invisible sib- lings--Ango Patih, Maragio Patih, Banus Patih and Banus Patih Ragio. He instructed me to memorize these names and to ask for the help of my brothers throughout my life, whenever I need them. He says I don't have to be formal when I speak to them, the way we are formal when we pray to God. I'm allowed to speak to my brothers with familiar affection, because "It just your family!" He tells me to say their names as I'm washing myself in the morning, and they will join me. Say their names again every time before I eat, and I will include my brothers in the enjoyment of the meal. Call on them before I go to sleep, saying, "I am sleeping now, so you must stay awake and protect me, " and my brothers will shield me through the night, stop demons and nightmares. "That's good, " I told him, "because I have a problem sometimes with nightmares. " "What nightmares?" I explained to the medicine man that I've been having the same horrible nightmare since childhood, namely that there is a man with a knife standing next to my bed. This nightmare is so vivid, the man is so real, that it sometimes makes me scream out in fear. It leaves my heart pounding every time (and has never been fun for those who share my bed, either). I've been having this nightmare every few weeks for as long as I can remember. I told this to Ketut, and he told me I had been misunderstanding the vision for years. The man with the knife in my bedroom is not an enemy; he's just one of my four brothers. He's the spirit brother who represents strength. He's not there to attack me, but to guard me while I sleep. I'm probably waking up because I'm sensing the commotion of my spirit brother fighting away some demon who might be trying to hurt me. It is not a knife my brother is carrying, but a kris--a small, powerful dagger. I don't have to be afraid. I can go back to sleep, knowing I am protected. "You lucky, " Ketut said. "Lucky you can see him. Sometimes I see my brothers in medita- tion, but very rare for regular person to see like this. I think you have big spiritual power. I hope maybe someday you become medicine woman. " "OK, " I said, laughing, "but only if I can have my own TV series. " He laughed with me, not getting the joke, of course, but loving the idea that people make jokes. Ketut then instructed me that whenever I speak to my four spirit brothers, I must tell them who I am, so they can recognize me. I must use the secret nickname they have for me. I
must say, "I am Lagoh Prano. "
Lagoh Prano means "Happy Body.
My thoughts- you know how there are people who don’t remember their dreams? Well I’m not one of them. I definitely remember my dreams, several of them, every single day. I have so many memories of my dreams that they have become actual thoughts now. What can I divulge about my dreams…hmm…I have had only one experience with lucid dreaming, but I am trying to train myself to recognize them better. I dream in black and white. I have a constant recurring nightmare where all my teeth fall out. I had a dream of my grandparents after they died and they told me they were ok, and then I was ok.
So how does all this relate to this part of the book? Well nightmares are no fun, and over time I have figured out several things that and ideas that prevent them. I know that no matter how cold I am I have to take off my socks before I fall asleep. I know that if I can hear my heartbeat getting consistently louder as I am trying to doze off I will have nightmares. I know that watching scary movies is a bad bad idea. And I know that I have an odd fear of certain objects in the dark (mostly mirrors, but at times closets, stairs, definitely basements, and sometimes ceilings). So reading this calmed me down a bit. Maybe I don’t believe in the 4 brothers but I like the idea of having someone protect you. Perhaps this is the reason I have always preferred having someone in the room while I sleep. Another person breathing is the most comforting sound you can hear. And a lot of people used to ask me if I was scared while staying in hostels because often there were guys in the room as well. But I actually slept better and more comfortably (as long as they weren’t snoring) because I had nothing to be afraid of. So I thought about who would be my best protector, and who is the first person I would go to if I was afraid at night… well the answer is quite obvious, I would turn to my best. But that isn’t really a valid option right now, so I thought of symbols and metaphorically speaking how could I feel a sense of calm. I found a small monkey, one of many that I have received over the years. He’s only the size of my hand but has a HUGE personality. And he is the best smile, it says, I am here for you, I care for you, I will protect you. He’s sitting with his little belly right beside my bed. He is protecting me.
I haven’t had a nightmare since :)
3 thing’s I am thankful for today
The exert from the book-
"ketut, why is life all crazy like this?" I asked my medicine man the next day. He replied, "Bhuta ia, dewa ia. " "What does that mean?" "Man is a demon, man is a god. Both true. " This was a familiar idea to me. It's very Indian, very Yogic. The notion is that human be- ings are born, as my Guru has explained many times, with the equivalent potential for both contraction and expansion. The ingredients of both darkness and light are equally present in all of us, and then it's up to the individual (or the family, or the society) to decide what will be brought forth--the virtues or the malevolence. The madness of this planet is largely a result of the human being's difficulty in coming into virtuous balance with himself. Lunacy (both collect- ive and individual) results. "So what can we do about the craziness of the world?" "Nothing. " Ketut laughed, but with a dose of kindness. "This is nature of world. This is des- tiny. Worry about your craziness only--make you in peace. " "But how should we find peace within ourselves?" I asked Ketut. "Meditation, " he said. "Purpose of meditation is only happiness and peace--very easy. Today I will teach a new meditation, make you even better person. Is called Four Brothers Meditation. " Ketut went on to explain that the Balinese believe we are each accompanied at birth by four invisible brothers, who come into the world with us and protect us throughout our lives. When the child is in the womb, her four siblings are even there with her--they are represen- ted by the placenta, the amniotic fluid, the umbilical cord and the yellow waxy substance that protects an unborn baby's skin. When the baby is born, the parents collect as much of these extraneous birthing materials as possible, placing them in a coconut shell and burying it by the front door of the family's house. According to the Balinese, this buried coconut is the holy resting place of the four unborn brothers, and that spot is tended to forever, like a shrine. The child is taught from earliest consciousness that she has these four brothers with her in the world wherever she goes, and that they will always look after her. The brothers inhabit the four virtues a person needs in order to be safe and happy in life: intelligence, friendship, strength and (I love this one) poetry. The brothers can be called upon in any critical situation for rescue and assistance. When you die, your four spirit brothers collect your soul and bring you to heaven. Today Ketut told me that he's never taught any Westerner the Four Brothers Meditation yet, but he thinks I am ready for it. First, he taught me the names of my invisible sib- lings--Ango Patih, Maragio Patih, Banus Patih and Banus Patih Ragio. He instructed me to memorize these names and to ask for the help of my brothers throughout my life, whenever I need them. He says I don't have to be formal when I speak to them, the way we are formal when we pray to God. I'm allowed to speak to my brothers with familiar affection, because "It just your family!" He tells me to say their names as I'm washing myself in the morning, and they will join me. Say their names again every time before I eat, and I will include my brothers in the enjoyment of the meal. Call on them before I go to sleep, saying, "I am sleeping now, so you must stay awake and protect me, " and my brothers will shield me through the night, stop demons and nightmares. "That's good, " I told him, "because I have a problem sometimes with nightmares. " "What nightmares?" I explained to the medicine man that I've been having the same horrible nightmare since childhood, namely that there is a man with a knife standing next to my bed. This nightmare is so vivid, the man is so real, that it sometimes makes me scream out in fear. It leaves my heart pounding every time (and has never been fun for those who share my bed, either). I've been having this nightmare every few weeks for as long as I can remember. I told this to Ketut, and he told me I had been misunderstanding the vision for years. The man with the knife in my bedroom is not an enemy; he's just one of my four brothers. He's the spirit brother who represents strength. He's not there to attack me, but to guard me while I sleep. I'm probably waking up because I'm sensing the commotion of my spirit brother fighting away some demon who might be trying to hurt me. It is not a knife my brother is carrying, but a kris--a small, powerful dagger. I don't have to be afraid. I can go back to sleep, knowing I am protected. "You lucky, " Ketut said. "Lucky you can see him. Sometimes I see my brothers in medita- tion, but very rare for regular person to see like this. I think you have big spiritual power. I hope maybe someday you become medicine woman. " "OK, " I said, laughing, "but only if I can have my own TV series. " He laughed with me, not getting the joke, of course, but loving the idea that people make jokes. Ketut then instructed me that whenever I speak to my four spirit brothers, I must tell them who I am, so they can recognize me. I must use the secret nickname they have for me. I
must say, "I am Lagoh Prano. "
Lagoh Prano means "Happy Body.
My thoughts- you know how there are people who don’t remember their dreams? Well I’m not one of them. I definitely remember my dreams, several of them, every single day. I have so many memories of my dreams that they have become actual thoughts now. What can I divulge about my dreams…hmm…I have had only one experience with lucid dreaming, but I am trying to train myself to recognize them better. I dream in black and white. I have a constant recurring nightmare where all my teeth fall out. I had a dream of my grandparents after they died and they told me they were ok, and then I was ok.
So how does all this relate to this part of the book? Well nightmares are no fun, and over time I have figured out several things that and ideas that prevent them. I know that no matter how cold I am I have to take off my socks before I fall asleep. I know that if I can hear my heartbeat getting consistently louder as I am trying to doze off I will have nightmares. I know that watching scary movies is a bad bad idea. And I know that I have an odd fear of certain objects in the dark (mostly mirrors, but at times closets, stairs, definitely basements, and sometimes ceilings). So reading this calmed me down a bit. Maybe I don’t believe in the 4 brothers but I like the idea of having someone protect you. Perhaps this is the reason I have always preferred having someone in the room while I sleep. Another person breathing is the most comforting sound you can hear. And a lot of people used to ask me if I was scared while staying in hostels because often there were guys in the room as well. But I actually slept better and more comfortably (as long as they weren’t snoring) because I had nothing to be afraid of. So I thought about who would be my best protector, and who is the first person I would go to if I was afraid at night… well the answer is quite obvious, I would turn to my best. But that isn’t really a valid option right now, so I thought of symbols and metaphorically speaking how could I feel a sense of calm. I found a small monkey, one of many that I have received over the years. He’s only the size of my hand but has a HUGE personality. And he is the best smile, it says, I am here for you, I care for you, I will protect you. He’s sitting with his little belly right beside my bed. He is protecting me.
I haven’t had a nightmare since :)
3 thing’s I am thankful for today
- Monkeys
- Catching yourself smiling at old memories
- Being lucky enough to have an insane collection of books!