You're wrong.. but thanks for calling what I said insignificant/irrational. I actually thought about it quite a bit.
I know I haven't really been communicative. But I haven't really been talking to anyone. Is that usually the way it works-- someone's life pretty much tanks incredibly, and they start calling up all their friends so they can offer support/just to talk? I didn't know. I don't call you because it's pointless. The times I've tried you are always busy, out at some show, working, or one time, eating lunch (yeah I am not going to be jumping at the bit to call someone to talk when eating lunch is more important than talking to someone who you hardly ever talk to.. BFFL!). So yeah... I don't call. I know that. But I also don't send you postcards and shit acting like we are all BFFL anymore. You have no fucking idea how much it hurt my feelings that you went all the way to Texas last year with your boyfriend, but never came to visit me. So fuck it. Why am I ever going to go back to Miami? I came there once already after I moved away. Who the fuck cares? We aren't really friends anymore, and I know it. But at least I know it. You of all people know how I feel about fake displays of affection/interest. Overall it just hurt my fucking feelings. Whether or not you think that's valid.
Anyway, it wasn't something to "use against" anyone. Don't even play it that way.
You're obviously online more than once a month... seeing how quickly you answered to my comment. Guess answering and of my numerous LJ entries about how miserable I was would have been a tad much.
I wouldn't not talk to you specifically because I'm eating lunch, but if I'm having lunch with someone else I think it's rude to be on the phone and ignore the person I'm with.
I'm the same way with people as you are... I'm horrible at keeping in touch PERIOD, and I don't expect people to keep up with me, but it doesn't mean I stop caring for someone. I didn't send you the postcard to "pretend" that we're friends. I know how out of touch we are and that we lead two very different lives, and I've also considered that I've disappeared from a lot of people's radars since I got a new boyfriend. I just like sending you shit now and then because (the way I see it) it's a reminder that I still think of you in spite of the fact that we're not close anymore. For you, I'm learning, it's just a feeble attempt at pretending to be friends. Why would I pretend to be friends with someone who lives in a different time zone?
I'm sorry that it hurt your feelings that I went to texas last summer. I got those plane tickets for free, although that's not really an excuse. I really did consider visiting you this spring break, but to be honest I worry that it would be a burden for you because of work, money, etc. I don't want to go there and make you feel even more stressed out than you already appear to be.
I know this will just continue to be some back and forth thing for a while, but I don't want to fight. I know that no matter what I tell you, it's not going to change the fact that we don't talk often or know everything going on in each other's lives. BUT. I really do consider you to be my favorite friend I've ever had, and my boyfriend definitely hears about you pretty frequently because I am always telling him that I miss hanging out in your apartment and bothering you.
I know I haven't really been communicative. But I haven't really been talking to anyone. Is that usually the way it works-- someone's life pretty much tanks incredibly, and they start calling up all their friends so they can offer support/just to talk? I didn't know. I don't call you because it's pointless. The times I've tried you are always busy, out at some show, working, or one time, eating lunch (yeah I am not going to be jumping at the bit to call someone to talk when eating lunch is more important than talking to someone who you hardly ever talk to.. BFFL!). So yeah... I don't call. I know that. But I also don't send you postcards and shit acting like we are all BFFL anymore. You have no fucking idea how much it hurt my feelings that you went all the way to Texas last year with your boyfriend, but never came to visit me. So fuck it. Why am I ever going to go back to Miami? I came there once already after I moved away. Who the fuck cares? We aren't really friends anymore, and I know it. But at least I know it. You of all people know how I feel about fake displays of affection/interest. Overall it just hurt my fucking feelings. Whether or not you think that's valid.
Anyway, it wasn't something to "use against" anyone. Don't even play it that way.
You're obviously online more than once a month... seeing how quickly you answered to my comment. Guess answering and of my numerous LJ entries about how miserable I was would have been a tad much.
See where I'm coming from?
Anyway, w/e. That was long as fuck.
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I'm the same way with people as you are... I'm horrible at keeping in touch PERIOD, and I don't expect people to keep up with me, but it doesn't mean I stop caring for someone. I didn't send you the postcard to "pretend" that we're friends. I know how out of touch we are and that we lead two very different lives, and I've also considered that I've disappeared from a lot of people's radars since I got a new boyfriend. I just like sending you shit now and then because (the way I see it) it's a reminder that I still think of you in spite of the fact that we're not close anymore. For you, I'm learning, it's just a feeble attempt at pretending to be friends. Why would I pretend to be friends with someone who lives in a different time zone?
I'm sorry that it hurt your feelings that I went to texas last summer. I got those plane tickets for free, although that's not really an excuse. I really did consider visiting you this spring break, but to be honest I worry that it would be a burden for you because of work, money, etc. I don't want to go there and make you feel even more stressed out than you already appear to be.
I know this will just continue to be some back and forth thing for a while, but I don't want to fight. I know that no matter what I tell you, it's not going to change the fact that we don't talk often or know everything going on in each other's lives. BUT. I really do consider you to be my favorite friend I've ever had, and my boyfriend definitely hears about you pretty frequently because I am always telling him that I miss hanging out in your apartment and bothering you.
I never meant to hurt your feelings.
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