Comments | thequestionclub: It sucks but its not the end of the world!

trivher in thequestionclub

It sucks but its not the end of the world!

May 15, 2007 20:34

What do you all recommend I do about someone who doesn't take criticism well? Such as a song they wrote and performed and when you are asked what did you think - If the response is anything less than great the person gets all depressed, rejected and a total ass for 20 minutes because they "suck". Arg ( Read more... )

Comments 7

cdaae May 16 2007, 00:37:59 UTC

Start off by praising the good points. And then I guess all you can do is say something like "I know you get depressed when something isn't perfect right off, but I think this piece would be even better if you tried X, Y, or Z. Please don't get all upset over this and think it means you suck, because you don't, you're great, and I just want to help you keep being great."

bizwac May 16 2007, 01:00:02 UTC

geez, i hate that.

my friend is a 'musician' too, and he has asked me what i thought of his songs. hen i tell him the truth, he gets pissy, but i dont want him getting a huge ego and thinking he is 'da bomb'. bah. i have no advice for you, only empathy.

bookbird May 16 2007, 01:00:30 UTC

Based on personal experience, that's something your husband will need to work through on his own. Have you told him how hard this behavior is on you?

I don't take criticism well, either, and no "softening" or praise beforehand will make me take it any better. In fact, I often see statements like "Well, you're good at X, BUT" as a condescention.

I do take criticism best, though, when it comes with specific, constructive suggestions on how I can improve.

ne_today May 16 2007, 01:07:47 UTC

artists are always a pain in the ass. Writers, musicians, painters, all of us.

The best thing I can tell you is to have a talk with him (while he isn't moaning about sucking) about how you don't know how to approaching him honestly because of his behavior, and go from there.

bpddjeoomon May 16 2007, 02:10:38 UTC

Hahaha...totally agree with one of the comments above. All of us artists are the biggest pains.

I have to deal with people like this on a regular basis. Try saying something like

"I loved (insert part you loved/liked)! You know what would be really cool? If you (insert a change on something you didn't like)."