Everything Happens For A Reason
so i'm still on disability from work, they're still not sure what's wrong yet, but i think we're getting closer, they did an upper gi and found that i have G.E.R.D. and my esophagus is too narrow where it connects to my stomach, so that may be part of the reason for the nausea, i went to the cardiologist and she thinks that it may be the same thing the neurologist was thinking, the neurocardiographic syncope which i guess is that my heart and brain don't communicate correctly so my blood pressure drops and i pass out, the cardiologist was really nice, i was in the hospital a few days ago because i had another episode, the ER doctor said it was a really bad panic attack, but when i told the cardiologist she said they said that to all the women but she didn't think that was what it was, that was a relief because i'm sick of everyone trying to tell me my problem is stress, i know that it's more than that, i had to wear a heart monitor on friday, if they don't find anything i'll have to wear one for a month, then on the 22nd i have to get a stress echocardiogram and then a sonogram of my heart to make sure its structurally sound, i'm going to see the gi doctor on the 22nd too, so hopefully i can get this all figured out and taken care of...
other then the medical stuff, the depression has been getting bad again, probably because of the issues with my health, on top of that things with john didn't pan out, not that i'm surprised, he couldn't make up his mind about anything, i got a refund on my hotel room, but the plane ticket i just have a credit that i'll have to use within the year, i'm going to see if i can do some kinda trip with friends and use my voucher for my half, who knows... on the upside i'm kinda glad john and i didn't work out, i ended up meeting this guy that i really like, we've gone out a few times, ended up making out in a parking lot and a cop came by and was like heeey, whatchya doin? but we didn't get in trouble which is good, he's a good guy, and i think he's really genuine about what he says for once, he knows all my problems and is cool about them all, i guess everything happens for a reason, geoff got me off my ass and got me to apply to school with him for a master's degree, i got all my letters of recommendation and everything, all i have left to do is my statement of purpose, so i guess i'm excited about that, i want to go back to work but i won't be able to til i get the treatments for whatever is wrong, i'm so broke right now, blah...
i gotta go to court in a few days for a speeding ticket from the last time i went to see george and jen, i had a court date a few days ago, and the retard that i am, i went to the wrong court house, so i got a letter from the court i was supposed to be at, hopefully everything will be okay once i go to the court date, i called and left a message about what happened so we'll see...
other then the medical stuff, the depression has been getting bad again, probably because of the issues with my health, on top of that things with john didn't pan out, not that i'm surprised, he couldn't make up his mind about anything, i got a refund on my hotel room, but the plane ticket i just have a credit that i'll have to use within the year, i'm going to see if i can do some kinda trip with friends and use my voucher for my half, who knows... on the upside i'm kinda glad john and i didn't work out, i ended up meeting this guy that i really like, we've gone out a few times, ended up making out in a parking lot and a cop came by and was like heeey, whatchya doin? but we didn't get in trouble which is good, he's a good guy, and i think he's really genuine about what he says for once, he knows all my problems and is cool about them all, i guess everything happens for a reason, geoff got me off my ass and got me to apply to school with him for a master's degree, i got all my letters of recommendation and everything, all i have left to do is my statement of purpose, so i guess i'm excited about that, i want to go back to work but i won't be able to til i get the treatments for whatever is wrong, i'm so broke right now, blah...
i gotta go to court in a few days for a speeding ticket from the last time i went to see george and jen, i had a court date a few days ago, and the retard that i am, i went to the wrong court house, so i got a letter from the court i was supposed to be at, hopefully everything will be okay once i go to the court date, i called and left a message about what happened so we'll see...