This Is Why I Speak Out

[theotherbaldwin]

There are some people that rail against the idea that there might be a culture of dismissive-ness about rape, or the use of rape to silence. The following anonymous comments left on my last article are a clear example of these attitudes, and why speaking out is necessary:

Trigger warning: What following under the cut are dismissive attitudes about

Comments

[theotherbaldwin]

We sort of differ,here. For you, you said it didn't bug you too much because you were used to it. For me, it was pretty much the last straw.

And y'know, at least you're acknowledging what you're laughing at is messed up. There's self-reflection there, which is important. It sounds kind of like the nervous laughter effect, y'know?

The thing is, as I think you'd be likely to agree, you can laugh nervously at jokes that are both not funny and terribly offensive because one can feel uncomfortable in dealing with the reality of the situation. Like, once you remind yourself "Oh, yeah, people get raped", the joke's not as funny anymore.

I don't think an urge towards nervously laughter makes someone a bad person, but it does indicate how far they are from the reality of the subject, not to mention that there could be someone in the room with you that has experienced the reality of that subject (about 1in 4 4 to 1 in 6 women are sexually assaulted at least one in their lifetime, and between in in 12 to 1 in 33 men). A lot of people just seem to operate on the assumption that rape is a rare occurance so the odds of encountering someone who's been raped and might be prone to flashbacks is just as low... when it isn't.

Cause that's the thing. Rape jokes just don't have the potential to offend. They have the potential, as mentioned in the article, to be really serious business triggering. This is why my last 2 posts, and the beginning of the article are all marked with trigger warnings.

I am fortunate, in that while most stuff like this doesn't trigger me, it does make me uncomfortable. It can certainly remind me of how the times it happened to me felt. And from speaking with a close friend who was directly triggered with PA's joke set up and response, it sucks.

It sucks a lot to be a survivor and have to deal with something like that out of nowhere. All of the ways one can deal have costs-- emotional, mental and at times physical-- when all you were trying to do was get your webcomic on (or hang out with friends, or surf the web, or chill out and watch the telly or whatever) that didn’t involve thinking about that time you were raped.That's a raw deal, considering how little it could cost the person just joking about rape to not tell a rape joke in the first place.

I have a place in my heart for gallows humor, but when you this joke (and the bullshit non-apology follow up they did, and then mocking trigger warnings and then selling the shirts and then the pennants)set it up like rape is a some remote nebulous things not very widespread when really it’s hella pervasive. Cause yeah, characters written by the artist aren't real... but the readers sure are.