Epic.
Alright, so today, I'm not going to go on about wierd things. I'm going to share a little bit of non-fiction that happened in my life today. It was an epic battle. It was an intense battle. Enjoy.
So I had to go out in the garage about a half hour or so ago. I'm not sure why, but anyway, I went out there, did what I had to do, and went back inside. As I was opening the door to go inside I hear "bzzzzbzzzzzzz". Naturally, being manly and whatnot, I disregarded it as a stupid bug that wanted to go inside.
As I walked to my room, I thought I heard that "bbzzzzbbzzzzzzz" again, except I could actually tell how loud this thing was buzzing. Usually, a louder sounds comes from a larger organism, or that's what I was thinking. Well this thing isn't bothering me, so I just let him be on his merry way for a few minutes. Anyway, I was walking to my computer chair and I hear the "bzzz" and I looked up and saw him fly into my bathroom.
That's MY bathroom(okay, Geoff's too, whatever). So I'm like "wtf bug?". I'm a pretty curious person right, so I get up from conversing with people on AIM to check out the noise. I looked in the bathroom, didn't see anything, didn't hear anything - but I knew that he was hiding. This bug was messing with me, he was messing with my mind, trying to freak me out. Good job bug, you win. So I'm a little on the weary side, this huge winged insect comes flying into MY bathroom. Not happening.
I went back and talked for a minute or two more, then I heard the "bzzzzzz.....bzzzzz". I knew I never saw him fly out...
This thing has been taunting me for the past 6 minutes, and that's no fun - so I decided to take action. I had recently gotten a application thing from Purdue(not sure why Nanny didn't throw it out - see, there is a reason for everything) and it was sitting on my scanner. So I picked up the booklet and rolled it up.
After that I walked over to my bathroom door and started hitting the wall, door, mirror, curtains, everything. That didn't work, so I tried to coax him out using words.
"Come out!"
"Come on bug, where are you?"
I even enlisted the help of Luci, the friendly pooch. She ran around the house barking and whatnot, but she didn't know what was going on and didn't help much.
All I wanted was for him to come buzzing out so I could end his life quickly. But no, Mr.Bug wants to play games. That's cool, because he was good at what he was trying to do. I didn't hear a peep out of him, until I pulled the door a bit and then shut it back real quickly.
"bzzzz"
Whoops, that was a mistake.
After the little "bzzz" from the door, I looked in between the space created by the door hinges.
On the floor, I see this 6 legged, winged insect, just chillen on the floor.
NO SIR! I can't have it.
The fact that he seemed so calm really bugged me. It was time to take action.
Now Momma ain't raise no fool. Either that, or I was afraid. I'll go with option number 1. So, before anything, I go and put some shoes on. I don't know what this thing is, or what it's gonna try, so I had to protect my feet..and it made me feel safer. Anyway, after I got my shoes on I had to get someone else to see this so that they wouldn't think that I was crazy. Nanny came and inspected the specimen, and declared that she had no knowlege of what it might be. My grandma is 62, she had no clue what this thing was. Yeah, that's not disheartening. By the way, I was pretty vulnerable. Wifebeater, boxers, and shoes. That was it.
After she got out of my way, I prepared for the assult.
So I'm about to go in the bathroom - rolled up purdue application booklet in hand. I was ready to own this thing. Then I thought, "I could throw a towel on it and demolish this thing." That was the new plan, I looked and saw the white hand towel hanging on the rack alongside of my freshly used green towel.
So I slowly walked into the bathroom and turned around. I closed the door a little, and it was just me and Mr.Bug. I opted for the white towel because I had only used the green one once, and was planning on using it again before it had to be washed. Oh well.
I took the white towel, and half-heartedly tossed it at Mr.Bug.
I MISSED.
The bug was pretty big by bug standards, but still only a little bit bigger than an inch or so. HOW DID I MISS? I THREW A TOWEL.
Anyway, so I'm like "Crap if he starts flying around I'll get some use out of this booklet." Luckily all he did was flap his wings twice. After the tension filled moment we shared, I snatched my green towel and flung it on Mr. Bug. I immediately started screaming jiberish and stomping with all of the 174 lbs of man that I am.
After about 4 hellacious stomps, I figured "I bet he's mushed and gross now. :)" I flipped the towel over and I think I saw his wings flutter. Sorry Mr. Bug. Then I flipped it back over and proceeded to stomp about 5 more times until I was sure that this sucker was dead. After a second or two, I rolled the towel over to inspect my handywork. It was actually pretty good, he wasn't mushed up or anything. He was just dead. Thankfully. I tried picking up him with the green towel but he fell to the white one. I had to go show my grandma, so I took it in the kitchen and put the towel on the floor.
As soon as I walked in she goes "Take it outside, they play dead and I don't want it comin' back to life."
"Let me just get a picture or 6, and then I will."
"Hurry up, I don't want it comin' back."
So I took some pictures:
So as you can see, he's quite a specimen. Anyway, after the photo shoot I threw him outside and called it a day.
Basically I owned something that was like 1/358th of my size.
Hope you enjoyed the story.
:)
So I had to go out in the garage about a half hour or so ago. I'm not sure why, but anyway, I went out there, did what I had to do, and went back inside. As I was opening the door to go inside I hear "bzzzzbzzzzzzz". Naturally, being manly and whatnot, I disregarded it as a stupid bug that wanted to go inside.
As I walked to my room, I thought I heard that "bbzzzzbbzzzzzzz" again, except I could actually tell how loud this thing was buzzing. Usually, a louder sounds comes from a larger organism, or that's what I was thinking. Well this thing isn't bothering me, so I just let him be on his merry way for a few minutes. Anyway, I was walking to my computer chair and I hear the "bzzz" and I looked up and saw him fly into my bathroom.
That's MY bathroom(okay, Geoff's too, whatever). So I'm like "wtf bug?". I'm a pretty curious person right, so I get up from conversing with people on AIM to check out the noise. I looked in the bathroom, didn't see anything, didn't hear anything - but I knew that he was hiding. This bug was messing with me, he was messing with my mind, trying to freak me out. Good job bug, you win. So I'm a little on the weary side, this huge winged insect comes flying into MY bathroom. Not happening.
I went back and talked for a minute or two more, then I heard the "bzzzzzz.....bzzzzz". I knew I never saw him fly out...
This thing has been taunting me for the past 6 minutes, and that's no fun - so I decided to take action. I had recently gotten a application thing from Purdue(not sure why Nanny didn't throw it out - see, there is a reason for everything) and it was sitting on my scanner. So I picked up the booklet and rolled it up.
After that I walked over to my bathroom door and started hitting the wall, door, mirror, curtains, everything. That didn't work, so I tried to coax him out using words.
"Come out!"
"Come on bug, where are you?"
I even enlisted the help of Luci, the friendly pooch. She ran around the house barking and whatnot, but she didn't know what was going on and didn't help much.
All I wanted was for him to come buzzing out so I could end his life quickly. But no, Mr.Bug wants to play games. That's cool, because he was good at what he was trying to do. I didn't hear a peep out of him, until I pulled the door a bit and then shut it back real quickly.
"bzzzz"
Whoops, that was a mistake.
After the little "bzzz" from the door, I looked in between the space created by the door hinges.
On the floor, I see this 6 legged, winged insect, just chillen on the floor.
NO SIR! I can't have it.
The fact that he seemed so calm really bugged me. It was time to take action.
Now Momma ain't raise no fool. Either that, or I was afraid. I'll go with option number 1. So, before anything, I go and put some shoes on. I don't know what this thing is, or what it's gonna try, so I had to protect my feet..and it made me feel safer. Anyway, after I got my shoes on I had to get someone else to see this so that they wouldn't think that I was crazy. Nanny came and inspected the specimen, and declared that she had no knowlege of what it might be. My grandma is 62, she had no clue what this thing was. Yeah, that's not disheartening. By the way, I was pretty vulnerable. Wifebeater, boxers, and shoes. That was it.
After she got out of my way, I prepared for the assult.
So I'm about to go in the bathroom - rolled up purdue application booklet in hand. I was ready to own this thing. Then I thought, "I could throw a towel on it and demolish this thing." That was the new plan, I looked and saw the white hand towel hanging on the rack alongside of my freshly used green towel.
So I slowly walked into the bathroom and turned around. I closed the door a little, and it was just me and Mr.Bug. I opted for the white towel because I had only used the green one once, and was planning on using it again before it had to be washed. Oh well.
I took the white towel, and half-heartedly tossed it at Mr.Bug.
I MISSED.
The bug was pretty big by bug standards, but still only a little bit bigger than an inch or so. HOW DID I MISS? I THREW A TOWEL.
Anyway, so I'm like "Crap if he starts flying around I'll get some use out of this booklet." Luckily all he did was flap his wings twice. After the tension filled moment we shared, I snatched my green towel and flung it on Mr. Bug. I immediately started screaming jiberish and stomping with all of the 174 lbs of man that I am.
After about 4 hellacious stomps, I figured "I bet he's mushed and gross now. :)" I flipped the towel over and I think I saw his wings flutter. Sorry Mr. Bug. Then I flipped it back over and proceeded to stomp about 5 more times until I was sure that this sucker was dead. After a second or two, I rolled the towel over to inspect my handywork. It was actually pretty good, he wasn't mushed up or anything. He was just dead. Thankfully. I tried picking up him with the green towel but he fell to the white one. I had to go show my grandma, so I took it in the kitchen and put the towel on the floor.
As soon as I walked in she goes "Take it outside, they play dead and I don't want it comin' back to life."
"Let me just get a picture or 6, and then I will."
"Hurry up, I don't want it comin' back."
So I took some pictures:
So as you can see, he's quite a specimen. Anyway, after the photo shoot I threw him outside and called it a day.
Basically I owned something that was like 1/358th of my size.
Hope you enjoyed the story.
:)