The Protomen
or: Why Geeks Should Rock More
I should admit here at the outset that I sometimes really like gimmicky bands and concept albums, and when you combine that with audiophilia you get some strange behavioral results. For example, King Crimson's In the Court of the Crimson King is one of my favorite albums of all time, and yet it is one of the few that I don't own on vinyl. Why, you may ask? Because every copy I find isn't in good enough condition. Yeah, I care that much.
Okay, I like concept albums. I like good storytelling. I'm also, if you haven't figured that out yet, a total sucker for geekiness. So a few months back when failchan mentioned, in passing, a concept band by the name of Protomen who were responsible for a rock opera based off the first Mega Man game... I may have squeaked in joy, I don't really remember, but I will say that the amount of frenetic energy I put into finding and downloading that album was legendary.
I'll admit, they aren't the greatest band in the world. But hell, creativity should always be appreciated, because the other end of the spectrum is some hack bullshit like Top 40 Pop or Dragonforce. Yes, I talk smack about Dragonforce. In my mind they are the Milli Vanilli of power-metal - fun in small doses, but never let yourself be deluded into thinking they're creative. Technique, no matter how impressive, can't replace passionate artistry. But I digress - back to the Protomen.
Their self-titled album is, as I said, a rock opera loosely following the plot of the first Mega Man game, combining light power metal, some country-rock style acoustic guitar work, and trumpet parts arranged in a way rather evocative of Ennio Morricone. What's that, you say? You never played Mega Man? Then here's the Reader's Digest version:
- Fat scientist and his friend who looks like Albert Einstein's evil twin build robots.
- Evil guy uses robot technology to conquer ZA WARUDO.
- Fat guy builds a robot - Proto Man - to stop evil guy.
- Proto Man gets his ass kicked so hard his head blows up, and evil guy is now in charge of the world.
- Fat guy builds another robot, calls him Mega Man, then drinks a lot and expressly forbids Mega Man to avenge his brother's death, even though Mega Man has a gun for an arm and was only built to blow shit up.
- Mega Man blows shit up.
- Mega Man blows more shit up.
- Dramatic revelation! Proto Man isn't dead, he's now leading the evil robot army. What a tweest.
- Mega Man kills Proto Man, fucks up the rest of the evil robots, and celebrates with ice cream and angst.
Well, I thought it made for a good rock opera. I'd love to see these guys live - I've heard their live shows compared to Daft Punk in the sheer amount of special effects and shenanigans - but as far as I can tell they've never played a show in Northern California, and haven't even played LA in two years. Depressing. Guess I'll just have to wait until September for their next album to come out.
In the meantime, enjoy this Protomen track about how awesome beards are.