Dealing with Difficult People & Reflecting on Myself
I'm in the middle of dealing with someone who is substantially difficult, unreliable, and well, a total a**hole. I feel as if I have just been burned and buried by this jerk off. What sucks the most, I should note, is that he happens to be my boyfriend's close friend, which inevitably makes things more difficult because I can't just never avoid him.
Basically, without going into too much boring and limitless detail, I asked this "friend" of mine to shoot a video for me for my job at CSUF. (He happens to be a film CSUF alumni too). He acted with enthusiasm and eagerness to do this, and I told him we could give him around 100 dollars for doing so. This video, which was extremely simple (just 5 people being interviewed and giving testimonials) was going to be placed on the school website, played for other alums, and played for future students. We had to initially reschedule our first date of shooting due to the fact that I didn't have enough interviewees committed. By this time, my "friend" said that the date I rescheduled it for could be a little problematic because of his job, but that it was NO problem either way because he'd have someone there to film as back-up.
FLASH FORWARD to the NIGHT before the video shoot: He calls me up and tells me to come over and he'll show me how to use the equipment. Equipment, mind you, that is professional, and that someone like me has NO IDEA and is NOT COMFORTABLE using. In addition, he's now acting like there's a bigger chance he won't be there, which is why he's showing me to use the equipment: but wait a minute, where is this "BACK UP" person? I myself had to call another friend, THE NIGHT BEFORE, and ask him if he could show up to do this for me in case my "friend" wasn't available. In a moment of stress, panic, and anxiety, I call my boyfriend, who, like I stated above, happens to be this "friend's" best friend. I tell him the situation, how I'm stressed, and how I felt that our "friend's" answers about being there the next night didn't seem sure nor positive. He becomes angry at the situation too, in disbelief that there was nobody on back up, and that our "friend" was depending on me to film it.
Anyway, ended up our "friend" did make it that night, and I felt like all was ok.
That was until my boyfriend talked to him about the situation and how he felt frustrated too.
So this conversation apparently enraged our "friend" enough to call me last night and bitch about how he thought I was "making up things" to my boyfriend and how I didn't "tell my boyfriend the whole story". The whole story? WTF are you talking about? I told my boyfriend everything you said that night and that there wasn't backup until I talked to our other friend about filming, THE NIGHT BEFORE. Our "friend" then preceeds to lie to me on the phone stating that our backup friend had been talked to by him earlier in the week (which is TOTAL B.S. because when I talked to him the night before he didn't know ANYTHING about the project, ANYTHING about where it was, etc...which sounds to me like someone who HASN'T been contacted to be back up!). In addition, he starts downgrading the project, saying he went "out of his way" to do this as a "favor" for me...like this was a burden to him and his time. This was really a shot in the heart because it just shows that he doesn't give two fucks about me, my job, or my requests.
So here I am stressed, confused, and hurt by the entire situation. I feel as if I've been burned by this guy. What makes it worse is that this jerk happens to be a prominent person in my boyfriend's life. I can't avoid him. On the other hand, my boyfriend is still angry with how our "friend" acted. He feels as if his behavior over the last few months has become destructive. He's been more insulting and egotistical than ever. The fact that I feel thus far that my boyfriend's got my back makes me feel a little bit better, but it still doesn't kill the beast of burden. I don't know what to do; I don't want to in hell talk to this guy after lst night's conversation. I don't want to do what I usually do and back down and apologize even though I'm clearly not in the wrong. I don't want to make this akward for my boyfriend, either.
This is a really tough and depressing situation.
Basically, without going into too much boring and limitless detail, I asked this "friend" of mine to shoot a video for me for my job at CSUF. (He happens to be a film CSUF alumni too). He acted with enthusiasm and eagerness to do this, and I told him we could give him around 100 dollars for doing so. This video, which was extremely simple (just 5 people being interviewed and giving testimonials) was going to be placed on the school website, played for other alums, and played for future students. We had to initially reschedule our first date of shooting due to the fact that I didn't have enough interviewees committed. By this time, my "friend" said that the date I rescheduled it for could be a little problematic because of his job, but that it was NO problem either way because he'd have someone there to film as back-up.
FLASH FORWARD to the NIGHT before the video shoot: He calls me up and tells me to come over and he'll show me how to use the equipment. Equipment, mind you, that is professional, and that someone like me has NO IDEA and is NOT COMFORTABLE using. In addition, he's now acting like there's a bigger chance he won't be there, which is why he's showing me to use the equipment: but wait a minute, where is this "BACK UP" person? I myself had to call another friend, THE NIGHT BEFORE, and ask him if he could show up to do this for me in case my "friend" wasn't available. In a moment of stress, panic, and anxiety, I call my boyfriend, who, like I stated above, happens to be this "friend's" best friend. I tell him the situation, how I'm stressed, and how I felt that our "friend's" answers about being there the next night didn't seem sure nor positive. He becomes angry at the situation too, in disbelief that there was nobody on back up, and that our "friend" was depending on me to film it.
Anyway, ended up our "friend" did make it that night, and I felt like all was ok.
That was until my boyfriend talked to him about the situation and how he felt frustrated too.
So this conversation apparently enraged our "friend" enough to call me last night and bitch about how he thought I was "making up things" to my boyfriend and how I didn't "tell my boyfriend the whole story". The whole story? WTF are you talking about? I told my boyfriend everything you said that night and that there wasn't backup until I talked to our other friend about filming, THE NIGHT BEFORE. Our "friend" then preceeds to lie to me on the phone stating that our backup friend had been talked to by him earlier in the week (which is TOTAL B.S. because when I talked to him the night before he didn't know ANYTHING about the project, ANYTHING about where it was, etc...which sounds to me like someone who HASN'T been contacted to be back up!). In addition, he starts downgrading the project, saying he went "out of his way" to do this as a "favor" for me...like this was a burden to him and his time. This was really a shot in the heart because it just shows that he doesn't give two fucks about me, my job, or my requests.
So here I am stressed, confused, and hurt by the entire situation. I feel as if I've been burned by this guy. What makes it worse is that this jerk happens to be a prominent person in my boyfriend's life. I can't avoid him. On the other hand, my boyfriend is still angry with how our "friend" acted. He feels as if his behavior over the last few months has become destructive. He's been more insulting and egotistical than ever. The fact that I feel thus far that my boyfriend's got my back makes me feel a little bit better, but it still doesn't kill the beast of burden. I don't know what to do; I don't want to in hell talk to this guy after lst night's conversation. I don't want to do what I usually do and back down and apologize even though I'm clearly not in the wrong. I don't want to make this akward for my boyfriend, either.
This is a really tough and depressing situation.