(no subject)
snippets from recent dreams: i was a spy. i was sent out to distract a group of people and take them to a concert while people ransacked their place. other spies worked with are people i actually know in real life and haven't seen in years. i wore scarves around my neck, which is something i almost never do. three of my teeth fell out. one came out almost completely clear. there was no blood shed and it looked almost as if i had no nerves inside the teeth in the longest time either. they almost came out like quartz. i couldn't do my job because i didn't understand why these teeth had fallen out. our vehicle to get the the concert was actually a moving mod house. glass walls and clear ceiling. everything was so posh and modern, much like a celebrity home inhabited by college students. i was enamored with one of my fellows spies, just like i had been in real life in my past. our mission felt accomplished, though we never ended up going to the concert.
***
i found my family in a wooden alcove in a city. my mother was dressed like a woman from india and had some strange blue tribal markings across her nose and cheeks. she was laughing at something my father said, her head thrown back when i arrived. i knew i was in another country, but why were they here? "aren't you.... dead?" she looked at me, her face the epitome of both seriousness and stern compassion. she just nodded and nobody else even seemed to notice i was there. i kept walking on my journeys trough foreign lands, with the echo of the fact that my mother was alive in some existence still out there. i was upset and disturbed but i knew for some reason i couldn't connect to her. that we weren't on the same planes. i was so close and yet so far away.
***
i was having a discussion with god. it was more like an argument. i don't remember exactly what it was about, but we argued on cool blue slate and surrounded by crisp clear sky. he wore a grey suit. i walked away and shoved my hands in my pocket. i was really frustrated, he didn't even seem to listen to me. the ground around me, the slate, seemed to have that heat wavy effect that you get when looking at roads off in the summer time distance, but around my feet.
i keep walking, and eventually i realize i'm just walking around the world, kicking rocks in exotic places. head full of fury and frustration and ultimately, just sadness for not being listened to. that's when i realize.... i feel ... pressure? yes. i feel a great pressure pushing down on me from above. it's not visible so much as it's just a feeling. it' snot like the world is on my shoulders, it's more like... the air has weight? and it's bearing down on me? maybe that's it' whatever it is, it's invisible and i KNOW god sent it cause he's pissed at me for even arguing with the guy. so i'm walking around the world and feeling this great pressure from above and the more i walk (which just don't feel like stopping) the more i feel. pushing me down and down to the ground.
eventually i'm practically crawling and instead of from above, it's pulling me down from below. i kept crawling cause stopping would be stupid or something and i liked seeing the world even if i was too pissed off about my conversation so i was crawling around until eventually i was just pulled to the ground, laying flat on my stomach.... and just to piss off god, even if the pull was so strong i could barely move, i kept trying to pull myself along, by my tips of my fingers. fuck you, god!
(god was played by david bowie)
***
i found my family in a wooden alcove in a city. my mother was dressed like a woman from india and had some strange blue tribal markings across her nose and cheeks. she was laughing at something my father said, her head thrown back when i arrived. i knew i was in another country, but why were they here? "aren't you.... dead?" she looked at me, her face the epitome of both seriousness and stern compassion. she just nodded and nobody else even seemed to notice i was there. i kept walking on my journeys trough foreign lands, with the echo of the fact that my mother was alive in some existence still out there. i was upset and disturbed but i knew for some reason i couldn't connect to her. that we weren't on the same planes. i was so close and yet so far away.
***
i was having a discussion with god. it was more like an argument. i don't remember exactly what it was about, but we argued on cool blue slate and surrounded by crisp clear sky. he wore a grey suit. i walked away and shoved my hands in my pocket. i was really frustrated, he didn't even seem to listen to me. the ground around me, the slate, seemed to have that heat wavy effect that you get when looking at roads off in the summer time distance, but around my feet.
i keep walking, and eventually i realize i'm just walking around the world, kicking rocks in exotic places. head full of fury and frustration and ultimately, just sadness for not being listened to. that's when i realize.... i feel ... pressure? yes. i feel a great pressure pushing down on me from above. it's not visible so much as it's just a feeling. it' snot like the world is on my shoulders, it's more like... the air has weight? and it's bearing down on me? maybe that's it' whatever it is, it's invisible and i KNOW god sent it cause he's pissed at me for even arguing with the guy. so i'm walking around the world and feeling this great pressure from above and the more i walk (which just don't feel like stopping) the more i feel. pushing me down and down to the ground.
eventually i'm practically crawling and instead of from above, it's pulling me down from below. i kept crawling cause stopping would be stupid or something and i liked seeing the world even if i was too pissed off about my conversation so i was crawling around until eventually i was just pulled to the ground, laying flat on my stomach.... and just to piss off god, even if the pull was so strong i could barely move, i kept trying to pull myself along, by my tips of my fingers. fuck you, god!
(god was played by david bowie)