GLITTER
me: Hi!!!
OMG, I just came up with the weirdest thought.
Like, you know how sparkles stick to everything?
WHAT DO THE SPARKLE GLITTER FACTORY WORKERS COME HOME LOOKING LIKE???
Like, someone who works at a sparkle packaging plant.
All the machinery that makes the sparkles must be COVERED
How do you make the sparkles anyways???
This is a Big Question. I must make a post on LJ.
Rya: Dude...
So many sparkles...
me: I KNOW MAN
Guys.
I am totally serious. Like, all the machinery must be totally, irrevocably GLITTERED. It's like a glitterblizzard in there, it's gotta be. RAINBOWS of SPARKLES. The workers have got to come home and, like, feel violated by those sparkles. Because you take a shower, scrub yourself all over. And still, EVERYTHING YOU OWN has just GOT to be covered in the stuff. You know glitter, guys. It NEVER LEAVES. I think I've heard that it's the herpes of the art world. The floors of those places have got to be so covered, you can't even see what it was made of anymore. Nobody remembers. It's just always been this thick layer of errant glitter.
Actually, if the plant makers were REALLY smart, they'd make it rainbow glitter-y ANYWAYS. So then you'd never KNOW if the glitter had been spilled or not.
Aha. Ha ha. I think that was pretty smart, actually.
But still, guys. Where does this stuff come from??? How is GLITTER made??? Does it just appear magically with the unicorns or something? I DON'T KNOW. But somebody has to. Right? Right???
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-Bot