Long time, no see. Guess I want to save this thought for awhile.
I went on the 311 bulletin board, after seeing lead singer Nick Hexum's admission of a broken engagement. For what I've been through personally, it's easy to dismiss it as 'just news to the fans'. I had my wisdom teeth pulled, and was souped up on Vicodin. WIth 4 teeth of wisdom gone, the last thing I expected to do was impart wisdom...on the lead singer of a band that has changed my life.
I made a post to Nick Hexum, telling how I saw things among the concensus of 311 diehards, mixed with my personal observations. I thanked him. Here, you see what I wrote:
_________________________-
I am just another fan of 311. I am nothing special to you, nor should I be. You guys are in the business of making music. As a bonus, you've gone out of your way to be personable with your fans. If it weren't for that quality, you wouldn't see us here, kicking you in the ass, patting you on the back, trying to tell you that we love you for your will to follow your own path.
I doubt you'll ever read this. I half-expect you to never read this, with your schedule being unfathomable to someone in my shoes. But as much as I look to you and your bandmates with a sense of gratititude, I wonder sometimes what goes through the mind of a guy who's saved so many people from losing their minds....No matter how trivial. "Who's to save the savior", so to speak?
You put your pants on, one leg at a time, just like everyone else. You fart, get drunk, and have to drop a deuce just like us. What is it then, that makes you so intriguing to so many people all over the world?
We relate to you. You relate to us. We wouldn't be so absorbed with you, Chad, miT, Doug, and Aaron had we never been able to say "Hey, I've been there". Sometimes we want to lose our minds, and have fun in doing so. Sometimes we cry, and need to know that someone out there has been there, or is willing to listen us venting on what pains us. The thing that keeps a majority of us fans is your willingness to be ballsy, or shamelessly open. A person of your stature should never have to subject themselves to that, but you do. Willingly.
You give strength to many by facing your demons, head on. Yet, above all else, you're not alone. You make a direct point that you and your bandmates are brothers. Inseperable. Imagine what that does to the spirits of your fans. We're not just kids wearing the 311 shirts, smoking bowls and blunts during "WGTH". We're people that care about every last person on that stage. We want the best for you, your families, and the band.
We thrive off of your honesty.
If you're mad...Be mad.
If you're happy...Be happy.
If you're sad.....well. We've all been sad, and have looked to you and the guys to keep us sane. Don't think for a second that any one of us wouldn't want to repay the favor to any one member of 311 for the things you have done for each and every one of us.
You've impacted many more lives than just mine, Nick. For what you guys have done for me, all I can say is the 'cliche bullshit' that I'm positive hundreds of people have said to you in person. Your music, your spirit, has saved me from doing some incredibily drastic and stupid things in my life. Your music has made me feel as though I fit in, and the emotions I feel are normal. Even when arguing with you, I've learned that differences of opinion are perfectly okay...It's even better to stick to the guns that got you where you are today, than to wither under unwanted pressures.
I feel like crying sometimes when I say that I am no longer a boy, but a man. The reason I cry is not out of fear, but out of the pride that I CAN do it. I would be face down in a ditch had it not been for you and the guys, working torwards a common goal that never fit someone else's mold.
That alone, has helped me garner some sort of control on my life. You will never know what 311 has done for me, no matter how many times I see any of you after shows. Yeah, so I smile like a dork when I see you guys around town. But if you could really understand why...You might be smiling too. Not just for my sake. The sake of every other kid growing up that has gone/ is going through a lot of what you guys make music about.
Now, as I profess my story in front of all these potential haters, I will say this: They wouldn't be here if you guys haven't made that kind of impact on them, too.
You have an album to make. Not for me, not for a record company, and not for us fans.. Only one thing matters: 311. Us fans'll be waitng. Mark my words. Please don't stop what you've started. The rockin' riffs, the Parliament-esque funkiness, the fire in your voices, that extra snap in the snares, the emotions... Or rather, THE fire that's burned in the souls of 5 talented men, for over 15 years. ( Yes, I said MEN. Eheeh! )
I cannot thank you enough for what you've done for me, over the past 15+ years. But I'm still here. And my allegiance to this band is unwavering, like many of us here. Through the greatest times, and the worst.... We're still here, and don't plan on going anywhere.
Take a deep breath...
Whether it's a silly drunken arguement, an emotional shoulder to lean on, a musical debate, a gut-wrenching personal problem, or a stoned conversation about the Super Bowl...
There's a lot of thankful people on this board for 311. A lot of people that might not be here today, had it not been for the inception of 311.
Don't look at us as followers. Look at us as if we're friends..
We got your back, and thank you for everything you've done for us. Keep plugging away, all 5 of you ( Except SA. Take a fuckin' shower once in awhile...Eheeh! ).
Thank you, and Stay Black.
#7518
H$Joel
Nor*Cal
____________________________
My sentiment was echoed by at least 20-40 people... thanking me, telling me they cried while reading my post, or agreeing & sharing their personal experiences.
Well, to my surpise, I've had about 8 test messages to my cell phone while I was out tonight, all of which informing me that Nick hexum replied to my thread. Somehow I feel as if I should feel 'honored', but I don't. I only feel as if I said soemthing to someone in a time of need, who maybe had doubts about themselves. Nothing I said was false. Nothing I said was "just to bullshit". I opened myself up in a way I have a hard time doing, no matter who the person may be.
So what'd he say in response? Take a gander for yourself:
__________________________________________________________________________
( Nick Hexum, on the 311 bulletin board) :
Nick
*Band Member
Member # 10237
posted 12-02-2004 10:01 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wow.
I don't know what to say.
Thank you would be a good place to start.
I always get a charge of motivation when I think of how we have a deeper bond with our fans than just entertainer and audience.
I don't know how to describe it. Friends will have to do but it doesn't quite identify the unique thing the at 311 is. We are one with our fans in a lot of ways so you could also call 311 a family, a movement, hmm.... how about "a positive army!!!"
OK, I'm getting a little worked up.
Your message came at a good time. I needed a little saving at this moment.
The cool thing about 311 is that we end up being saviors for each other. I think we've tapped into peoples will to be positive. Sometimes I come on here and I read about someone having a problem or being negative and a bunch of other people come back and say exactly what I might have said. It's fun to read. It's fun to be a part of.
We are more than a band. You guys are more than fans to us.
Have a good one. I hereby decide to take matters into my own hands and have a good evening and bust out of the doldrums that get us all from time to time.
Thanks.
Nick
_______________________________________________________________
I should feel blessed. People have been telling me that. I just feel like I did something for someone who does what I did for everyone else. As much as I want to think I've helped someone out, I know the one thing that DOES make me smile is the fact that I got a lot of things off my chest that normally would go ignored....and were not.
He may be a rock star. TO some people, maybe a sex symbol. But if you throw all the glitz aside, he's always going to be one thing: human.
I tried to make it obvious. I still don't know what to say. I still don't know if I should respond. I feel strange. I feel like I've done a semi-good deed. At the same time, I feel as if I was obligated to do so.
If anyone's still on my buddy list, then I say hello. Long time no see, even if you've turned into people that don't talk to me because you're above me now, or hang out with douchebags. And to those who I am glad to see, hello.
I made a post to Nick Hexum, telling how I saw things among the concensus of 311 diehards, mixed with my personal observations. I thanked him. Here, you see what I wrote:
_________________________-
I am just another fan of 311. I am nothing special to you, nor should I be. You guys are in the business of making music. As a bonus, you've gone out of your way to be personable with your fans. If it weren't for that quality, you wouldn't see us here, kicking you in the ass, patting you on the back, trying to tell you that we love you for your will to follow your own path.
I doubt you'll ever read this. I half-expect you to never read this, with your schedule being unfathomable to someone in my shoes. But as much as I look to you and your bandmates with a sense of gratititude, I wonder sometimes what goes through the mind of a guy who's saved so many people from losing their minds....No matter how trivial. "Who's to save the savior", so to speak?
You put your pants on, one leg at a time, just like everyone else. You fart, get drunk, and have to drop a deuce just like us. What is it then, that makes you so intriguing to so many people all over the world?
We relate to you. You relate to us. We wouldn't be so absorbed with you, Chad, miT, Doug, and Aaron had we never been able to say "Hey, I've been there". Sometimes we want to lose our minds, and have fun in doing so. Sometimes we cry, and need to know that someone out there has been there, or is willing to listen us venting on what pains us. The thing that keeps a majority of us fans is your willingness to be ballsy, or shamelessly open. A person of your stature should never have to subject themselves to that, but you do. Willingly.
You give strength to many by facing your demons, head on. Yet, above all else, you're not alone. You make a direct point that you and your bandmates are brothers. Inseperable. Imagine what that does to the spirits of your fans. We're not just kids wearing the 311 shirts, smoking bowls and blunts during "WGTH". We're people that care about every last person on that stage. We want the best for you, your families, and the band.
We thrive off of your honesty.
If you're mad...Be mad.
If you're happy...Be happy.
If you're sad.....well. We've all been sad, and have looked to you and the guys to keep us sane. Don't think for a second that any one of us wouldn't want to repay the favor to any one member of 311 for the things you have done for each and every one of us.
You've impacted many more lives than just mine, Nick. For what you guys have done for me, all I can say is the 'cliche bullshit' that I'm positive hundreds of people have said to you in person. Your music, your spirit, has saved me from doing some incredibily drastic and stupid things in my life. Your music has made me feel as though I fit in, and the emotions I feel are normal. Even when arguing with you, I've learned that differences of opinion are perfectly okay...It's even better to stick to the guns that got you where you are today, than to wither under unwanted pressures.
I feel like crying sometimes when I say that I am no longer a boy, but a man. The reason I cry is not out of fear, but out of the pride that I CAN do it. I would be face down in a ditch had it not been for you and the guys, working torwards a common goal that never fit someone else's mold.
That alone, has helped me garner some sort of control on my life. You will never know what 311 has done for me, no matter how many times I see any of you after shows. Yeah, so I smile like a dork when I see you guys around town. But if you could really understand why...You might be smiling too. Not just for my sake. The sake of every other kid growing up that has gone/ is going through a lot of what you guys make music about.
Now, as I profess my story in front of all these potential haters, I will say this: They wouldn't be here if you guys haven't made that kind of impact on them, too.
You have an album to make. Not for me, not for a record company, and not for us fans.. Only one thing matters: 311. Us fans'll be waitng. Mark my words. Please don't stop what you've started. The rockin' riffs, the Parliament-esque funkiness, the fire in your voices, that extra snap in the snares, the emotions... Or rather, THE fire that's burned in the souls of 5 talented men, for over 15 years. ( Yes, I said MEN. Eheeh! )
I cannot thank you enough for what you've done for me, over the past 15+ years. But I'm still here. And my allegiance to this band is unwavering, like many of us here. Through the greatest times, and the worst.... We're still here, and don't plan on going anywhere.
Take a deep breath...
Whether it's a silly drunken arguement, an emotional shoulder to lean on, a musical debate, a gut-wrenching personal problem, or a stoned conversation about the Super Bowl...
There's a lot of thankful people on this board for 311. A lot of people that might not be here today, had it not been for the inception of 311.
Don't look at us as followers. Look at us as if we're friends..
We got your back, and thank you for everything you've done for us. Keep plugging away, all 5 of you ( Except SA. Take a fuckin' shower once in awhile...Eheeh! ).
Thank you, and Stay Black.
#7518
H$Joel
Nor*Cal
____________________________
My sentiment was echoed by at least 20-40 people... thanking me, telling me they cried while reading my post, or agreeing & sharing their personal experiences.
Well, to my surpise, I've had about 8 test messages to my cell phone while I was out tonight, all of which informing me that Nick hexum replied to my thread. Somehow I feel as if I should feel 'honored', but I don't. I only feel as if I said soemthing to someone in a time of need, who maybe had doubts about themselves. Nothing I said was false. Nothing I said was "just to bullshit". I opened myself up in a way I have a hard time doing, no matter who the person may be.
So what'd he say in response? Take a gander for yourself:
__________________________________________________________________________
( Nick Hexum, on the 311 bulletin board) :
Nick
*Band Member
Member # 10237
posted 12-02-2004 10:01 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wow.
I don't know what to say.
Thank you would be a good place to start.
I always get a charge of motivation when I think of how we have a deeper bond with our fans than just entertainer and audience.
I don't know how to describe it. Friends will have to do but it doesn't quite identify the unique thing the at 311 is. We are one with our fans in a lot of ways so you could also call 311 a family, a movement, hmm.... how about "a positive army!!!"
OK, I'm getting a little worked up.
Your message came at a good time. I needed a little saving at this moment.
The cool thing about 311 is that we end up being saviors for each other. I think we've tapped into peoples will to be positive. Sometimes I come on here and I read about someone having a problem or being negative and a bunch of other people come back and say exactly what I might have said. It's fun to read. It's fun to be a part of.
We are more than a band. You guys are more than fans to us.
Have a good one. I hereby decide to take matters into my own hands and have a good evening and bust out of the doldrums that get us all from time to time.
Thanks.
Nick
_______________________________________________________________
I should feel blessed. People have been telling me that. I just feel like I did something for someone who does what I did for everyone else. As much as I want to think I've helped someone out, I know the one thing that DOES make me smile is the fact that I got a lot of things off my chest that normally would go ignored....and were not.
He may be a rock star. TO some people, maybe a sex symbol. But if you throw all the glitz aside, he's always going to be one thing: human.
I tried to make it obvious. I still don't know what to say. I still don't know if I should respond. I feel strange. I feel like I've done a semi-good deed. At the same time, I feel as if I was obligated to do so.
If anyone's still on my buddy list, then I say hello. Long time no see, even if you've turned into people that don't talk to me because you're above me now, or hang out with douchebags. And to those who I am glad to see, hello.