Full College Panic!
Oh my... I haven't updated for a month. Where did the time go? I lost a friend, but I guess that's to be expected, since I could have been in outer space for all you guys knew. Sorry for being such a lame LJ friend. I'm going to work harder to update and comment, because this journal has been an important part of my life for so long, and you guys are important to me too. (Um, does anybody remember who I am? *sweatdrop*)
Anyway, I'm starting college on September 3rd, and I am so nervous! A few months ago, I felt distantly happy about it, seeing it as a way to reinvent myself and make new friends and all that... but now that it's so close, the panic has set in. I just want to run away, like I always run away from everything in my life. It's too pathetic. And I know I can't run away this time because this is my chance, but even so, the worries are gnawing at my insides. This past year, I've been such a loner - what if I can't even remember how to properly have a relationship? What if I can't make a single friend? What if I go through all four years of college alone? I'm going to be living at home, too, so I think that will make it even harder for me to make friends, as if my poor social skills weren't enough of a handicap!
I guess I'll just have to join the anime club and start from there. If I can find likeminded people, it will be easier to talk and have fun together. I can do it! I can do it!!! *laughs to tears* Please wish me luck.
Oh -- it might be relevant to mention that I'm going to RIT (Rochester Institute of Technology) for New Media Design and Imaging (web design, basically), ha ha! My classes are History: Modern America (trying to drop it or switch to another class, since I already have AP credit for two history classes), First Year Enrichment, Drawing, 2D Design, Imaging for New Media, and Intro to Multimedia. It probably sounds boring, but I'm exited and determined to work hard. I want to be able to express myself in as many ways as possible, and this major will help me do that. But first chance I get, I'm signing up for Japanese! :P
So, how are your lives going? Are any of you starting college too? How are you coping? Are you as nervous as I am? Eek!
Anyway, I'm starting college on September 3rd, and I am so nervous! A few months ago, I felt distantly happy about it, seeing it as a way to reinvent myself and make new friends and all that... but now that it's so close, the panic has set in. I just want to run away, like I always run away from everything in my life. It's too pathetic. And I know I can't run away this time because this is my chance, but even so, the worries are gnawing at my insides. This past year, I've been such a loner - what if I can't even remember how to properly have a relationship? What if I can't make a single friend? What if I go through all four years of college alone? I'm going to be living at home, too, so I think that will make it even harder for me to make friends, as if my poor social skills weren't enough of a handicap!
I guess I'll just have to join the anime club and start from there. If I can find likeminded people, it will be easier to talk and have fun together. I can do it! I can do it!!! *laughs to tears* Please wish me luck.
Oh -- it might be relevant to mention that I'm going to RIT (Rochester Institute of Technology) for New Media Design and Imaging (web design, basically), ha ha! My classes are History: Modern America (trying to drop it or switch to another class, since I already have AP credit for two history classes), First Year Enrichment, Drawing, 2D Design, Imaging for New Media, and Intro to Multimedia. It probably sounds boring, but I'm exited and determined to work hard. I want to be able to express myself in as many ways as possible, and this major will help me do that. But first chance I get, I'm signing up for Japanese! :P
So, how are your lives going? Are any of you starting college too? How are you coping? Are you as nervous as I am? Eek!