"im a faggot. im sorry. this is how i am. peace."
theres nothing really to say...nothing except for everything thats running through my mind. thousands of thoughts that i cant put into words. it all just morphs into an unspoken silence and a profusion of tears. i couldnt say any words that would make a difference in your life, nor would you care to consider them. but even if i had the chance to say everything i wanted to it would just come out to be noise. screams and rants of irrelevant thoughts that would add up to me caring too much and you caring too little. people give you excuses of why you dont have to care.... but im tired of giving you excuses and accepting excuses that other people have given you.
ive never obsessed yet hated something so much it hurts. it kills. it makes me die a little bit inside. maybe this is how real disappointment is supposed to feel. or maybe its just the feeling of loss. its embarrassing how upset i am, and even more embarrassing how he doesnt even acknowledge the situation. to him, there is no situation. just too much drama that he doesnt have the time or patience to "deal" with. its because he has too much going on. he has one priority-his love is his only priority; a love that defaces the true meaning of its name. FYI- infidelity isnt love, baby.
i was told that people are meant to be exactly what the future intended them to be. but what do you do when the future has turned the person you care for so much into somebody you cant even stand. somebody you loathe. somebody you wish you never knew. i guess all you can do is walk away. let it happen. and let it go.
again- it wasnt supposed to happen this way. thats what he said.
i regret the past 5 years entirely. ive never been so sure in my life. its in your finest moments of desperation and self-loathing that you come to a realization, leading you to clarity.
ive never obsessed yet hated something so much it hurts. it kills. it makes me die a little bit inside. maybe this is how real disappointment is supposed to feel. or maybe its just the feeling of loss. its embarrassing how upset i am, and even more embarrassing how he doesnt even acknowledge the situation. to him, there is no situation. just too much drama that he doesnt have the time or patience to "deal" with. its because he has too much going on. he has one priority-his love is his only priority; a love that defaces the true meaning of its name. FYI- infidelity isnt love, baby.
i was told that people are meant to be exactly what the future intended them to be. but what do you do when the future has turned the person you care for so much into somebody you cant even stand. somebody you loathe. somebody you wish you never knew. i guess all you can do is walk away. let it happen. and let it go.
again- it wasnt supposed to happen this way. thats what he said.
i regret the past 5 years entirely. ive never been so sure in my life. its in your finest moments of desperation and self-loathing that you come to a realization, leading you to clarity.