Just a bit of fun and then I'll get back on writing real blogs
12 Ways You Know Attempting Suicide is Just a Cry for Help:
12: Dr.Kevorkian has stopped returning your calls.
11: For the last time, Pop rocks and Coke is not a killing combination.
10: Your answering machine message went, "I'm all alone, I have no friends, and I'm going to kill myself ... Oh, and Jerry, I'll be at The Boiler Room tonight. You better have my Flock of Seagulls CD."
9: Your suicide weapon of choice was a plastic KFC spork and Jell-o.
8: "Dear Diary, who do you think will be most upset?...'till then, ta ta!"
7: "Hello, Marvin? Can you meet me at my house at 8:07pm? The front door will be open and I'll probably be up in my room. Oh, by the way, do you know the number for the Poison Control Center?"
6: You start giving away your wordly possessions but you keep all of the good shit.
5: Local paper headline: "Fucktard Jumps from Groundfloor Window"
4: To the best of my knowledge, you can't overdose on Flintstones vitamins.
3: The operators at the suicide prevention line have come to referr to you as their mascot, "Snivels."
2: Your suicide notes end with "I really mean it this time!"
1: Baxter has labeled you an emo kid.
12: Dr.Kevorkian has stopped returning your calls.
11: For the last time, Pop rocks and Coke is not a killing combination.
10: Your answering machine message went, "I'm all alone, I have no friends, and I'm going to kill myself ... Oh, and Jerry, I'll be at The Boiler Room tonight. You better have my Flock of Seagulls CD."
9: Your suicide weapon of choice was a plastic KFC spork and Jell-o.
8: "Dear Diary, who do you think will be most upset?...'till then, ta ta!"
7: "Hello, Marvin? Can you meet me at my house at 8:07pm? The front door will be open and I'll probably be up in my room. Oh, by the way, do you know the number for the Poison Control Center?"
6: You start giving away your wordly possessions but you keep all of the good shit.
5: Local paper headline: "Fucktard Jumps from Groundfloor Window"
4: To the best of my knowledge, you can't overdose on Flintstones vitamins.
3: The operators at the suicide prevention line have come to referr to you as their mascot, "Snivels."
2: Your suicide notes end with "I really mean it this time!"
1: Baxter has labeled you an emo kid.