"Do Dragons Taste Better?" (Friday night filk)
A dragon came out to our village last fall,
It seems the nearest town had no virgins at all,
He said he’d be most puissant but powerfully sweet,
If we’d only supply him with virgins to eat.
When treating with dragons, well, what can you do?
If you’re flamm- or inflammable, you’re mostly screwed,
So we shamefully caved in, but don’t you be vexed,
For the wise among you have figured out what’s next!
Does dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
Do you garnish with pickles or pink candy floss?
Do you use the thigh bones for bouillon or lacrosse?
Does a dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
First we sent him some incels locked up in a cage,
But the bars were no match for the boys’ pent-up rage,
They tossed one longing gaze at some corset-clad elves,
And beat that poor beast like they beat up themselves.
So we sent him to recess at our local school,
Where there’s thirty sweet eight-year-olds girls, as a rule,
He was covered in ribbons and hugs and in glitter,
But they mocked his style, now his morale’s in the
Does dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
Do you garnish with pickles or pink candy floss?
Do you cut the sandwiches aslant or across?
Does a dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
So he stagger-winged off to the convent that night,
Where the Sisters mercifully ended this blight,
They dragged him to the narthex, knocked back a wine cooler,
Then thoughtfully beat him to death with a ruler.
Now we’ve ten tons of meat for to braise or to stew,
He’s too tough and too flameproof to e’er barbecue,
We’ve made ground dragon bangers and drake tetrazinni,
And our cauldrons are quite sick of “leftover meanie.”
Does dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
Can you make pemmican if you use the right moss?
Can you use a fish fork, would that be a faux pas?
Does a dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
When I thanked Sister Bernadette for this great feast,
She said, “This fable calls for one moral at least,”
So this is the placard we left at the scene:
“Don’t mess with the nuns. (And third-graders are MEAN.)”
It seems the nearest town had no virgins at all,
He said he’d be most puissant but powerfully sweet,
If we’d only supply him with virgins to eat.
When treating with dragons, well, what can you do?
If you’re flamm- or inflammable, you’re mostly screwed,
So we shamefully caved in, but don’t you be vexed,
For the wise among you have figured out what’s next!
Does dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
Do you garnish with pickles or pink candy floss?
Do you use the thigh bones for bouillon or lacrosse?
Does a dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
First we sent him some incels locked up in a cage,
But the bars were no match for the boys’ pent-up rage,
They tossed one longing gaze at some corset-clad elves,
And beat that poor beast like they beat up themselves.
So we sent him to recess at our local school,
Where there’s thirty sweet eight-year-olds girls, as a rule,
He was covered in ribbons and hugs and in glitter,
But they mocked his style, now his morale’s in the
Does dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
Do you garnish with pickles or pink candy floss?
Do you cut the sandwiches aslant or across?
Does a dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
So he stagger-winged off to the convent that night,
Where the Sisters mercifully ended this blight,
They dragged him to the narthex, knocked back a wine cooler,
Then thoughtfully beat him to death with a ruler.
Now we’ve ten tons of meat for to braise or to stew,
He’s too tough and too flameproof to e’er barbecue,
We’ve made ground dragon bangers and drake tetrazinni,
And our cauldrons are quite sick of “leftover meanie.”
Does dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
Can you make pemmican if you use the right moss?
Can you use a fish fork, would that be a faux pas?
Does a dragon taste better with Hollandaise sauce?
When I thanked Sister Bernadette for this great feast,
She said, “This fable calls for one moral at least,”
So this is the placard we left at the scene:
“Don’t mess with the nuns. (And third-graders are MEAN.)”