RP: Things change

[neville_inbloom]

Date: 22 September 2001
Characters: Neville, Hermione
Status: Private
Summary: Neville catches up with Hermione.
Completion: Complete

Comments

[bossy_brunette]

It was probably a good thing that Charlie was going back to work soon because Hermione could easily get spoiled to leaving Quin at home sometimes when she had to run errands in London. She loved Quin and enjoyed spending time with him, but after the last couple of months, it was nice to have short breaks of time to herself before things went back to normal.

She arrived at the Leaky a few minutes early and found Neville standing in the doorway. She walked up to him and gave him a hug. "Hi, Neville," she said. "Did you want to eat upstairs or go downstairs for more privacy?"

[neville_inbloom]

Neville returned the hug, still staring at the changes in the pub. "Thank Merlin you're here," he said, standing away to look at her. "I was afraid I'd walked into the wrong place for a moment. When did all this happen?" He waved one hand, indicating their surroundings.

"Um, downstairs." Neville followed Hermione further inside, still gawking. "Privacy. Privacy is good."

The Leaky had a downstairs now? That was new.

[bossy_brunette]

"Tom did some redecorating a few weeks ago," she said with a smile. "It takes a little getting used to but if you look closely, there's still signs of the old pub around. The downstairs, however, is new and quite nice. Quin likes to sit down there when we come here now because he enjoys watching drunk people play darts."

She laughed and led Neville down the stairs. She scanned the room and found a booth in a corner away from everyone. She didn't plan to question Neville about the break up because she was trying to be better about interfering where she wasn't wanted, but if he did want to talk, she'd rather no one else be around to overhear.

[neville_inbloom]

"It must've happened while I was in France." Neville sat down, folding his hands on the table. "It's a definite improvement. I just need to relearn my way around."

He waited until Hermione had also taken a seat. "Quin's not with you? How did you manage that?"

Reaching for a menu, Neville opened it and looked over the offerings. Even the menu was different.

Everything seemed to have changed. It was disconcerting.

[bossy_brunette]

"Probably so," she said. "I didn't know anything about it until we decided to go out for dinner since Charlie felt better. We were surprised to see the changes."

She sat down and smiled. "Charlie is watching Quin this afternoon," she said. "He's enjoying the time with Quin before he has to go back to work."

"Was your conference informative?" she asked, studying the menu before deciding on her usual: a bacon sandwich, chips, and peach juice. "When Quin gets older, I hope we can afford to take him to France and other countries to learn about different cultures and history from the source. I always wanted to travel more when I was younger, but my parents worked a lot so Brighton during the summer was the extent."

[neville_inbloom]

I'm glad Charlie's feeling better," Neville said warmly. "He must be, if he volunteered to watch Quin for you! I bet he's quite a handful

[bossy_brunette]

"Quin is beyond handful most the time, I think. He's got so much energy and so much curiosity that it takes constant supervision to make sure he's not getting into mischief."

She smiled. "I don't mind listening to you talk about the lectures. It sounds fascinating. I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. You really deserve to have fun with work."

"I heard from Harry on my birthday," she answered, not sure if she should mention Ron or not. She didn't want to make Neville feel uncomfortable. "It sounds like he's doing well. We're planning to get together for lunch soon. Things are still a bit awkward for me considering our fight and some of the things said, honestly, but that's the past and I probably deserved it."

"As for anyone else, I heard from several people on my birthday, which was nice. I thought people wouldn't remember," she admitted. "I'm glad that Kenneth is doing a good job for you. You definitely needed the help. Your accounts are doing wonderfully."

[neville_inbloom]

The server returned with their drinks. Neville took a swig from his butterbeer and said, "There was one lecture about different kinds of dragon dung compost and how they affected screechsnaps and their hybrids. Charlie might have enjoyed that one." Shrugging, he grinned at Hermione. "He might have made it more interesting, too. The speaker reminded me a little too much of Professor Binns back at Hogwarts."

"Of course people would remember your birthday!" Neville exclaimed. "Why wouldn't they? I'll bet you got some really nice notes and presents, too." He made a wry face. "At least you didn't spend it in bed with a summer cold like I spent mine!"

"I should owl Harry sometime soon. It's been awhile since we got together, not since he and Draco were in San Francisco and Ron and I..."

Neville took a deep breath and forced himself to look across the table at Hermione. "This must be so awkward for you," he said miserably.

[bossy_brunette]

"You should owl Charlie about that lecture. I'm sure he'd be interested in hearing about it," she said. "I think he's dying to get back to work now that's recovering and would appreciate the work-talk."

Hermione shrugged. "I don't know. I nearly forgot, so I expected others might. It's never been a very big deal for me, you know? It's just another day, really, and the boys never got me presents when we were younger. It was nice to get owls, though, and meant a lot."

"It's not awkward, Neville," she said. "At least, no more awkward than things are when two people you care about are hurting. Relationships are tricky and complicated, though, and I know from experience that there's no quick-fix. I'm here and willing to listen without offering my opinions should you feel a need to talk. Otherwise, we're just two good friends catching up over lunch."

[neville_inbloom]

"Yeah, I think I'll do just that." Neville nodded and swallowed more butterbeer, finishing the bottle and signalling the server for another. "I kept all my notes. Maybe he'll know something else that the speaker left out or something. You know I'm willing to do anything to help him pass the time until he can get back to work."

"I don't know how it can't not be awkward," Neville said. "You must be biting your tongue something fierce."

The rest of Hermione's words finally registered in his brain. Neville stared at her in disbelief. "Ron's hurting?"

That made no sense at all.

"What exactly did he tell you?" Neville couldn't help but ask. He might as well hear Ron's version of events before he went any further.

[bossy_brunette]

"Well, I don't know the whole story and I love you both, so I'm trying to be here for both of you," she said honestly. "I certainly don't want to make things worse, and I don't intend to choose sides because I just want you both to be happy. I hate that you're hurting and I can't fix it, but relationships aren't something that can be fixed by research, really, so all I can do is be here if you need me

[neville_inbloom]

"He just told me it had happened before we left for Greece last summer." Neville turned the butterbeer bottle in his hands, watching the light catch on the glass. "He said he meant to tell me all along, once he knew whether or not the baby was his. Said he was trying to protect me."

Neville sighed and set the bottle back onto the table, grateful when Hermione took his hand and squeezed. Squeezing back, he said, "I don't know how you can make things worse than they already are, and I can't stop thinking about what happened, so you're not making me do anything."

Shrugging half-heartedly, Neville's fingers tightened around Hermione's. "I don't know why I left like that. I mean, I do, but it wasn't just because he shagged some groupie and accidentally almost got her pregnant. There were other things too, and when I saw the article in the Prophet I guess I snapped. Told him that everything was more important to him than us and that I was tired of being second best. He didn't deny it, so I left

[bossy_brunette]

"He mentioned those photographs, the nude ones? I think it happened around then," she said softly. She smiled wryly. "Ron does like to protect those he loves. It's too bad that he's not very good at thinking things through all the way, though. I love him dearly and his intentions are usally well-meaning but

[neville_inbloom]

"I don't know," Neville admitted. The server arrived with their food and he took the opportunity to request another butterbeer. He didn't usually drink like this in the middle of the day, but considering the subject matter he thought he could make an exception.

Waiting until the server had moved away, Neville continued, "Ron probably wouldn't want to talk to me now anyway. I did a pretty thorough job of burning my bridges while I was in France, between not answering his owls and...and other things." He thought of Mireille. It hadn't been cheating, it hadn't. He wasn't sure Hermione would see it that way. He knew Ron wouldn't.

"I don't know if love is enough," he said softly, picking at his food. "It's not that I don't love him, or miss him. I do. It's...it's just that I can't keep taking him back over and over again without any reason other than the fact that I love him and miss him, or else nothing will change. I don't know what else to do."

[bossy_brunette]

"Love on its own isn't enough," she said. She didn't know what had happened in France but wasn't going to ask. If he hadn't offered more than 'other things', she probably didn't want to know. She took another drink of her juice and tried to figure out the words to say.

"Neville, I'm not an expert on love. Until Charlie, I never really knew what it was, and I spent years isolating myself because the idea of loving someone scared me. Random shagging was one thing, but the concept of sharing every aspect of my life with another person, of giving them the power to hurt me, of making myself vulnerable in that way...it wasn't something I wanted or needed," she said quietly. "When I met Charlie, that changed. I changed, I guess. But it's not just love because, really, that's an emotion the same as any other

[neville_inbloom]

"No, that actually makes sense." Neville gave Hermione a tiny smile to show he understood what she was trying to say. "It's probably the first sensible thing I've heard since before I left for the convention