(no subject)
Daniel had William for the day. For the whole day. I hadn't had a day all to myself since he was born. Now that he was over his pox, though, it seemed I was deserving of some rest. Rightly so. I had dropped him off with Daniel and had given clear and thorough instructions on how to hold him, how and when to feed him, how to change him, how to lay him down to sleep...or hold him if need be. How to put on the sling. When not to take him outside. How to carry him if he did go outside. What to do if he cried like he was hungry and what to do if he cried like he was wet. I was helpful enough to even demonstrate how William cried, though Daniel only looked at me like I'd gone wonko. It had taken the better part of an hour to explain, in detail, the care and feeding of William. I was finally shooed away and went to get food.
It was so freeing, being unencumbered by my son. I walked leisurely and watched the birds and listened to their calls. When I got to the compound I had a calm, uninterrupted breakfast and then went to the box and got a brand new outfit. I'd taken a shower and done my hair. And then I realized...I'd run out of things to do.
I'd run out of things to do and I'd only been without my son for an hour and a half. My days had been so consumed by the small person that I found that without him...I didn't know what to do with myself. I took a few magazines from the shelf and sat down, but leafing through them didn't hold my attention. I began looking for a reel of something to watch, but all it gave me were things labeled 'Stargate' and I'd promised Daniel I wouldn't watch anymore of those. Finally, at a loss, I racked the balls, grabbed a cue stick, and circled the pool table. I didn't sink a single thing when I broke, and I continued that trend. I couldn't seem to focus. All I could think of was how many hours there were between now and when I could have my baby back.
It was so freeing, being unencumbered by my son. I walked leisurely and watched the birds and listened to their calls. When I got to the compound I had a calm, uninterrupted breakfast and then went to the box and got a brand new outfit. I'd taken a shower and done my hair. And then I realized...I'd run out of things to do.
I'd run out of things to do and I'd only been without my son for an hour and a half. My days had been so consumed by the small person that I found that without him...I didn't know what to do with myself. I took a few magazines from the shelf and sat down, but leafing through them didn't hold my attention. I began looking for a reel of something to watch, but all it gave me were things labeled 'Stargate' and I'd promised Daniel I wouldn't watch anymore of those. Finally, at a loss, I racked the balls, grabbed a cue stick, and circled the pool table. I didn't sink a single thing when I broke, and I continued that trend. I couldn't seem to focus. All I could think of was how many hours there were between now and when I could have my baby back.