Not Pictured

[echolls_cursed]

Logan tried to stay away from the film cans on the bookshelf. After all, they tended to be nothing but trouble. Whether it was an episode of Veronica's TV show, or a fake documentary featuring Joe's death, nothing good ever seemed to come of sitting down to take in a film. Well, okay, nothing good with the exception of sitting and watching some

Comments

[little_moons]

Well isn't that just the fucking perfect plot twist.

It's hard to really accept it... That Logan's like- my life, might've been scripted by some asshole for entertainment value. A fucking primetime teen drama, and whatever the hell mine was supposed to be. It's hard to really wrap your head around it, and most of the time I'm pretty good at forgetting, but then I walk into the rec room and have it all dropped right the fuck down on my head again

[echolls_cursed]

It took Logan a long moment to snap out of it, but when he did he offered Neil a small smile. Forced normality despite the fact that everything felt compleatly fucked up and wrong.

"Hey," he said quietly, settling back against the cushions as he tried to think of something to say. Something that didn't involve 'I let friend's brother kill himself' or 'Duncan killed my dad'. But really, he was hard pressed for conversation starters outside of what he'd just seen.

"Guess I am a hero, huh?" he said instead, deciding to try and force himself to focus on the one good thing that had happened.

Beaver was dead, Aaron was dead... But Veronica was okay. She was crazy and wreckless... but she was okay.

[little_moons]

"Guess so," I say quietly, leaning back into the cushions and letting our shoulders brush. 'Cause he had been. Saved the fucking day. Its weird, but I feel a little bit proud of him for that, even though I've obviously got no fucking clue what the hell was going on outside of him keeping Veronica from getting her crazy ass shot. "Who was that kid?"

[echolls_cursed]

"Dick's brother," Logan said, simply and quietly. "He used to tag along with us a lot... I didn't know that he'd... or any of that stuff with him and Veronica. He was never that sort of guy, you know? At least that's what we all thought."

[little_moons]

"Jesus," I hiss, and for a long time I don't know what the fuck to say, 'cause that's beyond fucked up. Every single one of those damn reels gets weirder the more he watches.

"I didn't... I didn't see much, I just came in. But I, uh... I saw the thing with your Dad..."

[echolls_cursed]

Logan went quiet at that and shrugged a bit, turning his attention to the hem of his t-shirt, picking at it until there was a loose thread.

"Yeah, well... He had it coming, right?" he said softly.

Not that it made him feel any better about it. Not that it didn't make him hate Duncan a little for taking away another part of his family, even as fucked up as his father had been.

He should have been in jail... not six feet under with a bullet lodged in his skull.

[little_moons]

"I guess," I say, 'cause if you wanna go in for all that eye for an eye bullshit, somebody should've taken a goddamn ashtray to the fucker's skull... maybe given him some lashes with one of his own goddamn Gucci belts first. Somebody had to do something besides just letting the bastard live the high life in a fucking penthouse suite. "Doesn't make it any less fucked up."

Sighing, I tip my head over to look at him, reaching out to let my fingers curl in his sleeve and just hanging on. "Been a while since you watched one of these... Why now?"

[echolls_cursed]

"It was just... there. I dunno, I guess curiosity just got the better of me or whatever," Logan sighed, raking his fingers through his hair. "I dunno why I watched it, I knew there wasn't going to be anything I wanted to see. I knew it would just be more misery... more reasons to hate myself, to hate Neptune. I guess I just never learned when to let things go."

[little_moons]

"What the fuck reasons are there to hate yourself?" I say, face twisting all up in a frown, but isn't that the fucking truth 'bout not being able to let go... 'Cept I'm sure as hell not the one to be judging him for that. 'm not exactly the type to just let shit slide.

[echolls_cursed]

"I let someone jump to their death. I'm the reason my father wasn't sent to jail... I destroyed evidence, Neil. If they'd had those tapes... He wouldn't have gone free, and he wouldn't be dead riht now," Logan said.

"I'm the reason two people are dead. Hell, three if you count Lilly. I fucked up. I fucked up over and over, and now people are dead."

[little_moons]

"You're not the reason they're dead," I say, sitting up and twisting around a little to face him, "Jesus Christ, Logan. You probably saved Veronica's life, and your dad pretty much tossed his own miserable fucking life away all on his own, and Lilly wasn't anybody's fault but his. That kid, Cassidy, he was about a thousand ways of fucked up, there wasn't a fucking thing you could've done there. I know it's fucked up. Hell, I can't even imagine how fucked up, but none of it is 'cause of you."

[echolls_cursed]

Logan nodded a little and sighed again. "I know... I know. I just can't help but think that maybe if I'd made different choices, things wouldn't be so bad."

He closed his eyes again and let out a dry laugh. "Guess you didn't hear him telling me how he was back in my life, huh?"

[little_moons]

"What, like 'hey, welcome home, Dad! Let's hug and put the past behind us'?" I snort humorlessly, drawing a leg up on the seat and leaning next to him, head tipped over on the cushions and my palm resting on his arm. "I know sometimes you don't see it, but getting away from him was good for you, Logan. All he ever did was fuck you over."

[echolls_cursed]

"I know," Logan sighed. "It's stupid, you know? Because given the option, I wouldn't want him here. I hate him. I just... I just never wanted to see him dead. Behind bars, sure. Out of my life and out of sight, but not dead. He was a bastard, and I could never forgive him for what he did. Not just to Lilly, but to my mom... to Veronica. I should be glad. I wanted him to just vanish for so long, but now that he has, it hurts. It hurts and I just don't understand why."

[little_moons]

"'Cause he was your dad," I say quietly, reaching up and brushing the hair off his forehead, "'Cause part of you loved him, even if the fucker didn't deserve it."

[echolls_cursed]

Logan tensed under Neil's touch, and then slowly relaxed. "He said I didn't have a choice," he said after a long pause. "That he had custody again, and financial control. He knew exactlly how to get me to stay. I was totally dependent on his money if I wanted to go to collage. He was always smarter than he looked."