If anyone had asked, Crowley would have denied it utterly, but at times he had a bit more Good in him than one might imagine1. He solidly blamed Aziraphale for this flaw, and now, his humanity as well. He certainly would never cop to having had certain tendencies towards birds throughout his entire existence.2These tendencies may have included
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The voice behind him was a touch scolding, a touch indulgent, and a touch pedantic.1
Aziraphale looked out at the ducks as he fussily straightened the collar on his shirt. "Are you throwing the bread to them or at them?"2
1. Through most of existence, Aziraphale managed to be at least one of these things at most times, and more often than not, all three.
2. At least none of the ducks seemed to be suffering from head trauma.
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"Does it honestly matter? They're eating, and that's the point2," he replied evenly.
1. Which he was actually quite good at, being an accomplished liar.
2. He failed to mention the other point was to enjoy the squabbling. The ducks ere provided what the humans seeme incapable of.
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1. And he said this with a great deal of authority, starting out with some theory about Pavlov's dogs, though the longer he spoke on the subject the more he hoped that Crowley wasn't paying close attention.
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1. Alluding, of course, to that thing of which they did not speak. Namely, Crowley's time in Hell and his subsequent preclusions to pain.
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He tossed some bread to the ducks, and in doing so perhaps overcompensated, sending them having to swim after it, which he wasn't sure was much better.
1. In fact, the Thing of Which They Did Not Speak bothered Aziraphale a great deal more than he tended to let on.
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1. This time.
2. Aiming for the ducks, naturally.
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1. This time.
2. Not to even speak of mango!
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1. He wasn't even attempting to be discrete.
2. But with his hand on Aziraphale's bum, it was clear he wasn't attempting to be discrete in that arena, either.
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He cleared his throat and added, "I ah, I do think that strawberry kiwi wine would be worth investigating."
1. It was unclear whether the scolding was for the bread hurling or the arse grabbing.
2. And besides, no one could hiss quite so well as Crowley.
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1. Mostly.2. Which in and of itself was unusual and indicative of just how much he'd embraced his humanity. Perhaps he'd had more imagination than most demons, but never enough to mention in passing.
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1. Though he thought the gesture a nice compromise.
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1. Just the tip of his tongue snaking out for a taste, mostly out of habit.
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1. Which always seemed to get a bit sweaty when there was kissing involved.
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1. And he hoped, quite a bit in fact, that it had been his devilish acts. He was rather fond of provoking Aziraphale, even here.
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1. Which was the best he could do, really, without admitting part of what Crowley suspected.
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1. He knew he didn't have to say anything. Years and years of perfecting that look had made for a predictable reaction.
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