I'm feeling everything I thought I had shoved away.

[the_17th_muse]

I'm sick again and my boyfriend drinks too much.

Last night was horrible. My throat was burning and my eyes were stinging with tears. I don't want to know anything anymore. Just surprise me with your picture in the obituary.
I don't even think you care or understand why I get so upset. Do you?

I can't focus to memorize my lines and there is no way I can sing. I don't think I will ever succeed at anything. Whenever something important comes up that I want to do well on I get sick. I hate this.

I had to wake up early this morning for my SAT prep course. It was stupid and long.

I got to see Josh after so it was worth being miserable and sick and tired. He could tell I was angry with him, I'm not really angry more disappointed. We got to see a preview for a movie. It was gay but sort of fun. When we were hugging I didn't want to let go. Whenever I say goodbye to him it always feels like it might be goodbye for forever.

This chloraseptic might just kill me before the tonsillitis does.

I hope I'm able to get those monologues done.

Come see me and bring soup tomorrow <3