Prompt Post 3
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“It's good to see you,” Marcus says when Esca hands it to him.
“You as well,” Esca says curtly. “I heard the news. Congratulations.”
“Oh,” Marcus pales. “Right. Thanks.”
He crowds Esca in the doorway, his hands holding tight to Esca's jacket, and the three of them stand awkwardly until Marcus seems to realize he should be making introductions. “Sorry, Esca, this is Victoria. Tor, this is Esca.”
She reaches to shake his hand again, and Esca nods at her. “Victoria, pleased to meet you.”
“Call me Tor,” she smiles, “and it's so great you're here! When Marcus said you wouldn't be able to make it to the wedding I was wondering if we'd ever have a chance to meet.”
Esca takes a quick glance at Marcus, who suddenly appears unable to meet his eye. “Well, we've met now, at least.”
“We have, yes! Now come in, come in,” Victoria motions for Esca to follow her, and they move down the hallway with Marcus following silently behind. “Will you be staying long?”
“No, not at all.”
Esca glances around as they walk through the house. It looks very generic, as if they're living in a model home, and Esca searches for any sign that Marcus lives there. There are no photos on the mantel, Marcus's books aren't on the bookshelf, and his favorite blanket -the red one with the white edging- is missing from the couch. Esca knows why. He knows Marcus left it behind fifteen months ago, and it's now tucked away in the bottom drawer of Esca's dresser. He used to take it out sometimes and wrap himself in it, imagining he could still smell Marcus on it - when he realized he couldn't anymore, no matter how hard he imagined, he stopped.
“I just wanted to say best wishes, and then I'll be on my way.”
Victoria directs him to a chair and offers him a drink, and Esca stays just long enough to sip it and make polite conversation. They talk about Esca's job, and Cottia and Lee, and how Marcus's uncle is doing, and Marcus says very little -only interjecting once or twice- as if he still can't quite believe the conversation is happening.
“I should be going,” Esca says as he sets his empty cup on the coffee table.
He's been there for ten minutes, tops, and as much as he wanted to see Marcus, Esca realizes at that moment he'd rather be anywhere else. He smiles and nods at Victoria, and politely declines when she invites him to stay until morning to avoid a long drive home in the dark.
Marcus rises, looking anxious. “Let me walk you out.”
“No,” Esca says, a little too harshly, “I can manage. Door's there. Same way I came in, yeah?”
“Esca,” Marcus says quietly, and if Victoria suspects anything she says nothing, “let me, please.”
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And he does mean it. He expected to detest Marcus's fiance at first sight, but he can't find fault with Victoria, aside from the fact that she has what Esca wants. Or wanted.
“She'll make you happy.”
“Esca.”
“Does she know about us?”
Marcus eases the door closed, as if he's aiming for privacy. “No.”
“That doesn't surprise me,” Esca says, “you never wanted to tell people back then either.”
“Esca,” Marcus repeats, and it sounds like it pains him each time he says it.
The idea makes Esca want to lash out, because Marcus has no right to sound hurt. He's the one who put them in this situation. He's the one who left Esca behind, and moved on, and now apparently can't say Esca's name without sounding like he's on the verge of breaking down. Esca is the one who was supposed to sound hurt, and kick Marcus in the shins, and tell him what an absolute prat he was - and still is.
But Esca glances around, and Marcus's neighbor is cutting his lawn in the fading sunlight, and someone else walks by with a dog on a leash, and Marcus's doorstep is probably not the best place to start an argument.
“You didn't even invite me,” Esca says under his breath. “I wouldn't be able to make it? What the fuck is that?”
“I couldn't,” Marcus mutters, “you know why.”
“I was your best friend, though. I mean, above everything else, there was always that.”
“You still are.” Marcus's eyes are pleading, and he's starting to look as upset as he sounds.
“No,” Esca says, his tone louder and more harsh than it should be on the front step of Marcus's house, “you don't get to do this. You don't get to be hurt over this.”
“Just - ” Marcus is struggling, and he reaches for Esca's wrist.
Esca pulls back, glancing around before meeting Marcus's eye. “No.”
“Esca, please,” Marcus pleads, “just stay. I want you to stay.”
“And what? Go over your wedding plans? Help you fix things around the house?”
“No, I just want to talk to you,” Marcus is giving him that broken look, the one that used to make Esca's heart hurt, and Esca has to look away from him.
“I'm not staying here.”
Marcus reaches into his pockets, hands searching, “I have money. Stay at a hotel, whatever you want, just don't leave.”
“This is fucking ridiculous, I shouldn't even be here. I don't know why I came.”
“Esca,” Marcus shoves several bills into Esca's hand, “please.”
Esca glances down at the bills and sighs as he looks back up at Marcus. “I'll stay until tomorrow. We'll have coffee or something. Somewhere public. Then I'm gone.”
“Okay, coffee,” relief washes over Marcus's face. “Promise me you won't leave before that.”
“I won't leave before that,” Esca mutters. “I said we'd have coffee, we'll have coffee. You know I keep the promises I make.”
The last line is a dig at Marcus, and Esca can see in Marcus's face when the meaning of the words hit him. Esca expected to feel satisfaction in seeing Marcus's face fall, but instead he just feels sick. How did they find themselves here?
“Give me your number,” Esca says, “I'll text you in the morning.”
Marcus scrambles to remember his number, and Esca puts it in his phone.
“Tomorrow then.”
Esca leaves without glancing at Marcus again, getting into his car and taking off without a wave. He knows Marcus stands on the steps and watches him go, but Esca can't be bothered to look back.
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It makes me hurt in a good way. I remember reading fics with similar plots back when I started fanfic and I didn't realize how much I missed them. They just seem to have that element that pulls on heart strings.
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*
[Done it. probably shouldn't have.]
Esca texts Cottia after he checks into the hotel. It's a low-key one, right off the highway. He'd stayed there once before with Marcus, when they'd been visiting Marcus's uncle, and Marcus wanted to avoid a big explanation of why they should share a room, and a bed. Looking back, the situation irks Esca, but at the time it was just fun - spending the day at the Aquila estate and then escaping back to the hotel, fucking for hours, drinking expensive things from the mini bar. Those were the early days, when everything was new and exciting, and anything seemed possible. They were finally together, after dancing around it forever, and they were happy. Now it feels like ages ago.
Cottia's reply comes almost immediately, as if she'd been sitting by her phone.
[Want me to call u?]
[Not up for talking. met her. very nice. he looks the same]
[i can only imagine his face when he saw you. did he say anything?]
[just small talk. Then he asked me to stay at a hotel]
[WHAT? so where are u?]
[that hotel by the highway where we stayed one time]
[the one where u broke the headboard?]
[yes. thanks for the reminder.]
[sorry. is Marcus with u?]
[no]
[oh.]
[we're having coffee tomorrow then I'm leaving]
There's a delay before Cottia texts again, and Esca assumes she's trying to decide what to say, or what might be safe to ask. They've always been open with each other, but she knows when to tread lightly - and Marcus is one subject that leaves her tiptoeing around Esca.
[so what do u think will happen?]
Esca considers the question for a second before typing a reply.
[We'll drink coffee then say goodbye. no other option really.]
[R u going to try to change his mind?]
Esca sighs as he reads the message. He would've loved to change Marcus's mind. He'd thought of a million scenarios during the drive up, most involving Marcus returning home with him after a lengthy apology. But now the idea seems ridiculous, and it's too late for that anyway. Victoria is nice, and they seem happy together, and if he loves Marcus shouldn't he want him to be happy?
Esca frowns at the idea, as it's easier said than done.
[Too late.]
[Esca. u guys love each other]
[not sure about that]
[what does that mean?]
[never mind. should sleep. will text you tomorrow]
[E, are u ok? call me]
[i'm okay. promise. ttyl]
[if u need to talk call me no matter what time]
[I will <3]
[love u]
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He can still picture Marcus sitting in a similar desk chair, checking his phone. Esca can see his silhouette standing in the door of the bathroom, and he can imagine the feel of Marcus in the bed next to him - laughing and smiling and talking quietly, then falling asleep first. He remembers massaging Marcus's leg on the second night, and then fitting in perfectly against Marcus's back, wrapping an arm around him and falling asleep. In the morning Marcus made coffee in the complimentary coffee maker, and it tasted like shit but Esca refused to say it first, pretending to drink it happily until Marcus took a taste and immediately ran to spit it out. The garbage bin is even in the same corner, and Esca can picture Marcus standing next to it, wiping his mouth and laughing. He'd taken the mug from Esca, not wanting him to drink anymore, and then they'd gone out for breakfast. Marcus paid, as if he owed Esca something for the awful coffee.
Esca flicks off the light, tired of remembering.
In the morning he'll see Marcus for the last time and they'll say their goodbyes. Then he'll go on with his life.
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I am both looking forward to and dreading (but in a good way!) their coffee date in the morning.
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I like how Cottia seems to think he's going to be able to do this. *crosses fingers*
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-author anon
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He's not prepared for the ache he feels when Marcus walks through the door. His Marcus, towering over everyone, searching for Esca's face in the crowd. Esca takes a deep breath, trying to hold onto his anger as Marcus catches sight of him and makes his way over.
“Hey,” Marcus says, and Esca can tell he's nervous. He's smiling but he's fidgeting, rubbing a palm against his thigh as he asks Esca if he's ordered anything yet.
“Thought I'd wait for you.” Esca moves to stand but Marcus stops him.
“Stay here, I'll get it.”
“Marcus, it's fine.”
“No, let me, please.”
Marcus leaves quickly, cutting through the crowd, and he returns with Esca's usual - a large coffee with three sugars, and an oatmeal cookie.
“Still remember that then,” Esca says.
“Yeah,” Marcus smiles, sitting down with his own coffee.
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