as it stands, so must it fade.
so the past couple of weeks/ month have been fairly eventful and fast paced. Packing, trying to get finances in order, realizing they will never ever be in order. Having financial aide (possibly) fall through, and still being unsure of the whole college situation. overall its been very stressful, but i'm still headed full steam ahead towards Virginia.
last week was pretty interesting. i visited an old friend, and am a bit torn on the whole situation because it was very bittersweet. honestly, it just reminded me of how things were and how things could have been if i were different. i am the constant in every social interaction i face, so i am the obvious reason when these situations become a deliverance to failure. Don't get me wrong, it was a fantastic 3 and a half day vacation, and i'd do it again if i could... it has just caused such an aura of constant contemplation. a tearing at the soul would be a better definition.
i had a fucked up dream last night... not like anything i've ever dreamt about before. i had a sharp and was all SI, and she shows up and starts doing it for me.nothing erotic or sexual about it... just her, cutting me instead of me doing it myself. an odd sense of connection welled up do to this, and i can't explain it... its just fucking wierd.
thursday i'll be gone... i still have a gut feeling that things are not completely right here, but sometimes you have to leave and let the loose ends handle themselves.
last week was pretty interesting. i visited an old friend, and am a bit torn on the whole situation because it was very bittersweet. honestly, it just reminded me of how things were and how things could have been if i were different. i am the constant in every social interaction i face, so i am the obvious reason when these situations become a deliverance to failure. Don't get me wrong, it was a fantastic 3 and a half day vacation, and i'd do it again if i could... it has just caused such an aura of constant contemplation. a tearing at the soul would be a better definition.
i had a fucked up dream last night... not like anything i've ever dreamt about before. i had a sharp and was all SI, and she shows up and starts doing it for me.nothing erotic or sexual about it... just her, cutting me instead of me doing it myself. an odd sense of connection welled up do to this, and i can't explain it... its just fucking wierd.
thursday i'll be gone... i still have a gut feeling that things are not completely right here, but sometimes you have to leave and let the loose ends handle themselves.