vagueries
is it over yet?
i'm sick and tired of the way things are going. what's worse, i can't change anything. i have no impact on my issues. i feel so useless and worthless and broken. i hate being broken. i hate waiting for some one to fix me. someone never comes. and should someone come along and start to fix me, they leave again in the midst of tinkering and repairing. am i doomed to stay broken? am i so dilapidated that i'll never be repaired?
this sucks. i just want it all to go away. i want to be ok again.
i think there's more wrong with me than i thought. i think no one cares because i tell people this and they're like "o that's no good... wanna hear about MY shitty day?" why is it ok to walk all over me?
why is it ok to treat me the way everyone treats me?
why am i so trusting? and why do i think that just because some one's being affectionate that something will come of it - it never will. no one wants me. no one needs me. i mean nothing, in the long run, to anyone. if i died today, no one would cry at my funeral.
just kill me and get this all over already. that will fix me. i won't be broken anymore.
i'm sick and tired of the way things are going. what's worse, i can't change anything. i have no impact on my issues. i feel so useless and worthless and broken. i hate being broken. i hate waiting for some one to fix me. someone never comes. and should someone come along and start to fix me, they leave again in the midst of tinkering and repairing. am i doomed to stay broken? am i so dilapidated that i'll never be repaired?
this sucks. i just want it all to go away. i want to be ok again.
i think there's more wrong with me than i thought. i think no one cares because i tell people this and they're like "o that's no good... wanna hear about MY shitty day?" why is it ok to walk all over me?
why is it ok to treat me the way everyone treats me?
why am i so trusting? and why do i think that just because some one's being affectionate that something will come of it - it never will. no one wants me. no one needs me. i mean nothing, in the long run, to anyone. if i died today, no one would cry at my funeral.
just kill me and get this all over already. that will fix me. i won't be broken anymore.