(no subject)
Watching Hikaru no Go, again, and I attacked by the fic-bunny of DOOM, when I heard two of the teachers discussing Isumi and this line "He had a fragileness about him last year" So I ended up writing a short little thing about fragile Isumi.
Title: Fragile
Rating: Pg-13 for suggested sex
Genre: Gen
Characters: Isumi, Yang Hai
Pairing: Yang Hai/Isumi
Disclaimers: I own nothing not even the clothes on my back
Summary: He is missing something and whatever it is he can’t get it from the Insei. So he does something daring, he gets on a plane and goes to a foreign country.
Fragile
Isumi had always been fragile, even before he was born. His mother had to spend the last two months of her pregnancy in bed and he still ended up coming out broken, his lungs too weak for his ineffective heart. He was more familiar with the doctors at the hospital than his grandparents by the time he was three. His hospital stays were often overnight if not longer. It was around this time that one of the doctors first teaches him how to play Go.
“Be careful” is the most common phrase in Isumi’s life. He is weak and frail and everything is dangerous for him. He can’t run like other children his age, he can’t be reckless and wild. His lungs still don’t pull in enough oxygen and his heartbeat is erratic and painful. Go is safe, go won’t turn his body against him, and he is good. He plays often and his game is strong and bright. He isn’t aware how he still holds himself back. He doesn’t realize that the caution that rules every other aspect of his life has slipped into his Go. One day Waya slumps over the board after a sound lose and sighs, “It’s impossible to win, you’re so careful about making the perfect shape.”
Isumi is the best Go player in the Insei program. He is the top of the class and has held onto that position for years. Which is the problem: he’s been an Insei for years. People who are Insei for years aren’t pros. They’re missing something. He quits, not Go, but the program. He is missing something and whatever it is he can’t get it from the Insei. So he does something daring, he gets on a plane and goes to a foreign country. His heartbeat aches in his chest and his bag is full of medicine to keep his lungs open and his blood flowing.
He loses his matches in China, loses to a child younger than Waya. He isn’t sure what is driving him at the moment. He knows how dangerous it is to be alone in a foreign country, but he’s being careful. He has enough medicine to last and people around him who speak Japanese. So he stays. He moves into the little dorm room with Yang Hai and studies Go.
Yang Hai teaches he a lot about Go, he teaches him how to control himself. He teaches him how to not let his worries get in the way. That’s part of what he learns in China, but more important, he learns how to be reckless. He learns about pushing himself to the limit. He doesn’t learn this playing Go; he can’t learn this from Go. He learns this from Yang Hai. He learns this lying in bed gasping for air while his pulse staggers frantically. He thinks about stopping. He thinks about explaining that this is killing him, that his heart can’t take it. But those lips are so sweet and he wants it. He has never wanted something as much as he wants this. So for the first time he is careless.
He lives through the experience. He spends two days in bed afterwards waiting for his heart to stop aching and the blue to leave his lips, but he lives. The world has opened up to him. He lives and for the first time he thinks he understands what it means to feel alive.
Title: Fragile
Rating: Pg-13 for suggested sex
Genre: Gen
Characters: Isumi, Yang Hai
Pairing: Yang Hai/Isumi
Disclaimers: I own nothing not even the clothes on my back
Summary: He is missing something and whatever it is he can’t get it from the Insei. So he does something daring, he gets on a plane and goes to a foreign country.
Fragile
Isumi had always been fragile, even before he was born. His mother had to spend the last two months of her pregnancy in bed and he still ended up coming out broken, his lungs too weak for his ineffective heart. He was more familiar with the doctors at the hospital than his grandparents by the time he was three. His hospital stays were often overnight if not longer. It was around this time that one of the doctors first teaches him how to play Go.
“Be careful” is the most common phrase in Isumi’s life. He is weak and frail and everything is dangerous for him. He can’t run like other children his age, he can’t be reckless and wild. His lungs still don’t pull in enough oxygen and his heartbeat is erratic and painful. Go is safe, go won’t turn his body against him, and he is good. He plays often and his game is strong and bright. He isn’t aware how he still holds himself back. He doesn’t realize that the caution that rules every other aspect of his life has slipped into his Go. One day Waya slumps over the board after a sound lose and sighs, “It’s impossible to win, you’re so careful about making the perfect shape.”
Isumi is the best Go player in the Insei program. He is the top of the class and has held onto that position for years. Which is the problem: he’s been an Insei for years. People who are Insei for years aren’t pros. They’re missing something. He quits, not Go, but the program. He is missing something and whatever it is he can’t get it from the Insei. So he does something daring, he gets on a plane and goes to a foreign country. His heartbeat aches in his chest and his bag is full of medicine to keep his lungs open and his blood flowing.
He loses his matches in China, loses to a child younger than Waya. He isn’t sure what is driving him at the moment. He knows how dangerous it is to be alone in a foreign country, but he’s being careful. He has enough medicine to last and people around him who speak Japanese. So he stays. He moves into the little dorm room with Yang Hai and studies Go.
Yang Hai teaches he a lot about Go, he teaches him how to control himself. He teaches him how to not let his worries get in the way. That’s part of what he learns in China, but more important, he learns how to be reckless. He learns about pushing himself to the limit. He doesn’t learn this playing Go; he can’t learn this from Go. He learns this from Yang Hai. He learns this lying in bed gasping for air while his pulse staggers frantically. He thinks about stopping. He thinks about explaining that this is killing him, that his heart can’t take it. But those lips are so sweet and he wants it. He has never wanted something as much as he wants this. So for the first time he is careless.
He lives through the experience. He spends two days in bed afterwards waiting for his heart to stop aching and the blue to leave his lips, but he lives. The world has opened up to him. He lives and for the first time he thinks he understands what it means to feel alive.