(no subject)
Stupid entry on my shitty life. To put it shortly, I am extremeley bummed and hung up over, guess what, a stupid girl. The thing thats even more frustrating was that it wasnt due to my normal bullshit. I didnt just decide one day because she was cute I'd try to mack her then not hang out with her and tell her through the computer one day i liked her and get shot down. I finally did what I said I should've done from day one and not look for a relationship. Let things ride and see how they play out. And all of a sudden it seemed like it'd worked out. No need for names but lets just say I picked her up and I dont know she actually seemed happy to see me and all that flirty bullshit. Anyway hung out friday, flirty bullshit. Said he had a good time. PCP recording/steve's party the next day. Convinced her to go. Someone told me she wanted me to kiss her goodbye. I try to, she dosent seem ready at all, dosen't happen. I'm extremely embarassed and grab Johnny and Swanson and get the fuck out of there. Get a text from someone still there, tell me she wants me to come back and do it for real. I do, it was awesome. I'm on cloud nine on the way home, I felt legitimatley happy for once and that things were finally going to go my way. She gets home 2 hours later and I get the fucking nice guy speech. Needless to say I was fucking bummed. Went to Jesus' wedding the day after, I tried letting it go. I had a good time and I was happy for my friend. Hung out with Po, Randy, Roy and Stevo all night. Went to Mikey's later that night and apparently it showed on my face. Needless to say I felt like an asshole for being "that guy". I dont like wearing my heart on my sleeves in cases like that. On some real shit though, I realized that my friends actually must care about me. Even the ones who are usually assholes were telling me to feel better or listening to the bullshit story. I'd like to thank Kill Your Idols, Brand New, Crime In Stereo, The Lawrence Arms/Sundowner and Alkaline Trio for being bands during time like these and for Autumn to be a good time of year to be depressed.