There's something happening here
I've heard conflicting stories. Some say we regenerate every seven years, others say we are completely different people every ten years. Regardless, I am not the person who left Austin and moved home to Ohio thirteen years ago. Nor am I the person whose last intimate relationship ended eleven years ago. I'm not the young girl who gave birth at eighteen, married at twenty, and divorced at twenty-three.
The tagline of my LJ is a Zora Neale Hurston quote - "There are years that ask questions and years that answer." I've been questioning for a few years now. Probably since my daddy's death in 2013, if I'm being completely honest with myself. Although I've had a few moments of hope bust through and take me to New Zealand and back to college. That's a long time of not truly being present in my own life and ignoring my surroundings in favor of isolation. At times I didn't feel deserving or worthy of the friendships I had cultivated and I lost some folks. I accept the losses and am grateful for the friends who remain. I miss the hard truths that friends tell when they know nothing can come between the friendship. I've neglected some of those friends and I am thankful to know we have weathered the storms and still remain intact.
There is a shift coming for me. I don't believe I will still have my current job this time next year. I don't know what job I will have, but I know the direction I want to head in. I want to matter and I want to do work that matters, to the community, to me, and to the planet. I'm not sure how to make it happen, but an outline started forming in my head earlier this week. I feel as if I'm being pulled towards this and it's a calling.
Much love to any and all who still read this.
The tagline of my LJ is a Zora Neale Hurston quote - "There are years that ask questions and years that answer." I've been questioning for a few years now. Probably since my daddy's death in 2013, if I'm being completely honest with myself. Although I've had a few moments of hope bust through and take me to New Zealand and back to college. That's a long time of not truly being present in my own life and ignoring my surroundings in favor of isolation. At times I didn't feel deserving or worthy of the friendships I had cultivated and I lost some folks. I accept the losses and am grateful for the friends who remain. I miss the hard truths that friends tell when they know nothing can come between the friendship. I've neglected some of those friends and I am thankful to know we have weathered the storms and still remain intact.
There is a shift coming for me. I don't believe I will still have my current job this time next year. I don't know what job I will have, but I know the direction I want to head in. I want to matter and I want to do work that matters, to the community, to me, and to the planet. I'm not sure how to make it happen, but an outline started forming in my head earlier this week. I feel as if I'm being pulled towards this and it's a calling.
Much love to any and all who still read this.