Fic commentary meme! "A Piece of the Action"
As requested by default_dollie, here's the James/Logan date (and smooch) from part two of A Piece of the Action. Additional requests are still welcome, 'cause I can pretentiously babble about stuff I write forever.
James watched Logan take in the sight of the restaurant. It was huge and fancy and James had needed to beg his mom for an advance on his next month's worth of allowances to pay for it, but he wasn't going to scrimp on this. He had one shot to impress Logan, and he was going to make it perfect. [Actually, given what we've seen of James' mom, I usually assume he's got more money to spend than the other guys, but in the first part of the fic I made a pretty big deal over them all being broke, so I decided it was advances on his (fairly generous) allowance instead of just what he had lying around.]
"Whoa," Logan said, as the hostess showed them to a table. Which happened to be sandwiched between a gorgeous fountain on one side, someone playing violin on the other, and directly under a chandelier. [Everything I know about what fancy restaurants look like I learned from watching TV. Heh.] "James, you can't afford any girls you might meet here." [Logan makes a good point! Considering the above thing about allowances.]
James waved that notion off. "You let me worry about that. I'll tell you when it's time for you to do something, okay? In the mean time, kick back, relax, and order a steak or something."
Logan looked at the menu. "The steak costs the same as my dad's monthly mortgage payment. I can't aff-- "
Another wave. "Dinner's on me, okay?"
"What?"
"I'm the one who dragged you out, so it's on me."
Logan stared at him for a long minute, then finally said, "Fine." [Logan is aware that something is up at this point, he just has no idea what it is and would never even think to guess James is taking *him* out.]
They ordered after a few minutes, and after the waitress walked away, Logan said, "What about her? She's hot."
James glanced after her. She was hot, probably a college student with a weekend job, or an aspiring actress hoping to be discovered. Young and blond with a tight body and legs for miles. Under other circumstances, James absolutely would have hit on her. But these weren't other circumstances, so he shook his head and said, "Nope, not my type."
"Your type?" Logan repeated. "Your type is breathing. No offense, but you're kind of a slut." [On the one hand, Logan is right; on the other hand, that's not a very nice thing to say to your best friend…]
That stung a little, but James knew it was basically true. He just didn't want Logan to think of him like that.
He shrugged. "I know, but when it comes down to it... I like brunets."
"Okay," Logan said, and craned his neck, looking around. [Logan: still very clueless. It's weird, actually, because I don't think Logan on the show really has self esteem issues, but they often creep in when I write him. Because even though he's 100% aware of how smart he is, he's also surrounded by guys the show tells us repeatedly are better looking/more talented/more fun.] "There's a hot brunet at the bar, but she's kind of old for you. Unless you're into that."
The woman at the bar did kind of have a sexy cougar thing going on, but James shook his head. "Just relax. I'll let you know." [For the record, I would read about James and a sexy cougar. Weirdly, while I have no interest in older guy/younger girl, I can totally do older lady/younger guy. Someone should write me keptboy!James.]
"Okay, okay." Logan leaned back in his chair, one hand idly playing with his napkin. "I just don't see how a restaurant like this is going to help. People come here on dates, not because they're looking for dates." [Logan, your earth logic has no place in Big Time Rush.]
"I have a plan," James said. Which was true. He just didn't mention to Logan that picking up a date was not part of it.
"If you say so. I mean, just, jeez." Logan looked over at the violinist. "It looks like we're on a date."
James almost choked on his drink. "Wh-what?"
Logan nodded. "That's what I would think, if I were some girl walking by. I wouldn't stop to hit on you, is all. You should have gotten Kendall's help with this plan, James. You're not very good at scheming all on your own."
"I thought you were mad at Kendall."
Logan rolled his eyes. "I'm not. It's fine. He's a whore, but whatever." [Wow, Logan, be more passive aggressive.]
"So I'm a slut, he's a whore... you got any opinions on Carlos you want to share?"
"He's messy?" Logan shrugged. "I'm just saying. Kendall will make out with people he claims he doesn't want for cash --"
"Claims?" [And James is totally right here. Logan has no idea that he's projecting, but he totally, totally is.]
"-- and you'll make out with anyone, ever. But I'm neurotic and nerdy, so who am I to judge?" [Again, self esteem issues. idk.]
"I don't think you're neurotic," James said.
Logan gave him a crooked smile. "Only because you don't know what that means."
James laughed. "I'm pretty enough that I don't need to be smart." [Some insecurities aside, James does not really have self esteem issues. He's not exactly self-aware, but he does have a very good sense of his own strengths and weaknesses.]
"Well, we don't all have that going for us."
"True," James said, and let his gaze linger on Logan for a moment. "You're not pretty, but you're... I don't know. More than cute, but not old enough to be handsome."
"Um, thanks, I guess," Logan said, his cheeks going slightly rosy.
James grinned. Logan was adorable when he blushed.
--
So this was James' idea of a big night out. Logan was baffled, but every time he asked James how exactly the two of them eating a giant, fancy dinner was going to get James a date, James just laughed the question off. So it was weird. [Logan: forever clueless.]
But not bad. Logan was mostly used to hanging out with the guys as a group, but chilling with just James was... pretty nice, he decided cautiously. For all James spent most of his time checking his hair in the reflection of silverware, he was also funny and easy to get along with. [So one of the things I worry about when I write fic in general and especially slash is how to keep the guys in character and make sure they all still have their random idiosyncrasies. So James still checking himself out in the silverware was my attempt to call back to the fact that, while he does very much want Logan and is trying to be a good, romantic date here, he's still the guy who has trouble putting down his mirror.] And he had this way of dropping off-hand comments that made Logan feel... appreciated, he supposed. Logan knew James didn't really care about the history of chandeliers within interior design, but Logan had read about it somewhere and when he mentioned it, James didn't seem too bored by it, and then he made some comment about being impressed by how much random stuff Logan could remember. [I tend to read Logan's smartness as general knowledge sponge-iness, in that he has no idea where he picked up most of the things he knows, but he never really forgets facts, which is why he knows completely random things like the chemicals used in kitty litter. It's not quite the same as his actual academics, but he does generally just like learning and picks up facts and concepts very easily.]
It felt weird and warm and Logan had never noticed it before. He'd also never noticed the way James' whole face lit up when he laughed, or how easy it was to make James laugh, or how good it felt when he did it. [And yet he still does not pick up on the WHY of this. Which is actually really how I read him in canon -- he's gay (I can not even conceive of a heterosexual Logan) but hasn't worked that out yet; someday, some boy will kiss him and a lot of things will fall into place for him very quickly, but it simply hasn't occurred to him yet, which is why he doesn't seem to be that into Camille but goes along with their relationship nonetheless.]
As, after James handed over enough cash to pay for a semester at college, they stood up. Logan shook his head a little. "I don't know. I don't get it."
"What's to get?" James asked, leaning against him and nudging him with his elbow. James led the way out, ushering Logan with a hand on the small of his back. Then he added, "You want to see a movie or something?"
"Do I... what is this, dinner and a movie?" Logan asked. [Finally, an inkling! Yes, Logan. Yes, it is.] He peered into the parking lot and found their car. "That's what I don't get. The whole point of having a wingman is having someone to help you get laid, or get a date, or whatever, and --"
"Did you have a good time?" James interrupted.
"Well, yeah," Logan said, flushing. He had. If this was all James wanted from him, Logan actually wouldn't have minded doing it more than once, but that wasn't the point.
"Because so did I," James said. "In fact, I had a great time."
"Well, great." Logan hit the button to open the car door. "But my point stands. You didn't even look at any of the girls in there. Or any of the boys, for that matter, since I guess that's a thing you do." [Logan: smart about facts, not smart about people.]
"It is," James said. "And you're wrong. I absolutely was checking out this one guy. He just didn't notice."
"What?" Logan asked, a little stunned. He'd spent the whole night waiting, bracing himself for it, but hadn't seen James look at anyone.
"And I did get a good date out of it," James continued.
"James, what are you talking ab--"
"Logan," James interrupted. His voice was soft, but his tone was firm, and Logan fell silent. "I think I've got something in my eye," James continued. "Can you do me a favor and check?" [Okay, so I am a HUGE story structure nerd. Even before I know what James was going to do in his many seduction attempts, I knew that whatever he tried on Kendall first he was going to try on Logan later and that what failed with Kendall would work on Logan. The look-into-my-eyes thing was the easiest way to do it.]
Logan swallowed. "It's pretty dark out here, I wouldn't be able to --"
"Just. Just look. Please?"
So Logan stepped close to James and looked up into James' eyes.
And.
Oh.
The world spun away from him and he couldn't look away. James' eyes seemed infinitely deep, perfect, beautiful... And just like that, Logan knew that he hated listening to James talk about girls because he was jealous, stupidly, bitterly jealous; and he wasn't mad at Kendall over a stupid bet, he was mad at Kendall for getting what he wanted. And that was what it all came down to: want. [FINALLY, LOGAN. I find bits like this totally cathartic to write. My general theory is that if I'm writing them and am at a point where I just want them to make out already, and I *know* they will, presumably readers will feel similarly.]
Raw, desperate desire.
Oh. [I wish I'd put in a different one word line here, since "oh" is also right above.]
James ducked his head and kissed Logan. Logan felt arms around him, felt James pull him until they were body to body. Logan had been kissed before, and passionately at that, but it had been nothing like this. This was like James' eyes, like infinity, like everything he had no idea he craved...
But of course he craved it. Because everyone wanted James. That was the point, wasn't it? [And this is right back to Logan's self esteem issues. When kissed by a hot guy, his immediate reaction is not "awesome," it's "Why is he doing this?"]
Logan stumbled back and pushed James away. He felt for the door handle and opened it, ducked inside, and fumbled to get the key to the ignition and his seatbelt in place. He just sat there and stared out the windshield as James clamored over to the passenger side and slid in.
"Logan --" James started.
"Don't. You made your point. I get it."
"Get what?" James asked, his voice breaking.
"There's no one at the Palm Woods who wouldn't make out with you. I get it, okay? Did Kendall put you up to this?" [In fairness to Logan here, Kendall does have plenty of reason to want revenge on these two, but it's actually James that Kendall made that threat to. Oh well. (I totally intentionally left the idea of Kendall getting revenge open as a potential sequel, but never came up with anything I liked enough to write.)]
"No! No, Logan, I'm not --"
"I don't want to -- stop," Logan said. He swallowed hard and finally turned the key. "Just stop. Leave me a little dignity and leave me alone."
James didn't say anything on the whole ride home.
[Endnote: I actually initially debated having this kiss just go well and ending the fic here, but since the fic has made it explicit that James is bi, but Logan hadn't even thought about James (or boys in general) Like That throughout, I wanted to give Logan an actual coming to terms moment. Also, I love any excuse for further ~~feelings, but I needed to balance that out -- the entire first 2/3 are just hijinks and silliness, and then it's like BAM, FEELINGS kind of out of nowhere. So I wanted to end on a ridiculous note instead of a big kiss to try and give it a better sense of flow instead of having two disjointed tones. (This is the sort of thing I mean by "obsessed with story structure." Also, I'm super pretentious about writing. Clearly.)]
James watched Logan take in the sight of the restaurant. It was huge and fancy and James had needed to beg his mom for an advance on his next month's worth of allowances to pay for it, but he wasn't going to scrimp on this. He had one shot to impress Logan, and he was going to make it perfect. [Actually, given what we've seen of James' mom, I usually assume he's got more money to spend than the other guys, but in the first part of the fic I made a pretty big deal over them all being broke, so I decided it was advances on his (fairly generous) allowance instead of just what he had lying around.]
"Whoa," Logan said, as the hostess showed them to a table. Which happened to be sandwiched between a gorgeous fountain on one side, someone playing violin on the other, and directly under a chandelier. [Everything I know about what fancy restaurants look like I learned from watching TV. Heh.] "James, you can't afford any girls you might meet here." [Logan makes a good point! Considering the above thing about allowances.]
James waved that notion off. "You let me worry about that. I'll tell you when it's time for you to do something, okay? In the mean time, kick back, relax, and order a steak or something."
Logan looked at the menu. "The steak costs the same as my dad's monthly mortgage payment. I can't aff-- "
Another wave. "Dinner's on me, okay?"
"What?"
"I'm the one who dragged you out, so it's on me."
Logan stared at him for a long minute, then finally said, "Fine." [Logan is aware that something is up at this point, he just has no idea what it is and would never even think to guess James is taking *him* out.]
They ordered after a few minutes, and after the waitress walked away, Logan said, "What about her? She's hot."
James glanced after her. She was hot, probably a college student with a weekend job, or an aspiring actress hoping to be discovered. Young and blond with a tight body and legs for miles. Under other circumstances, James absolutely would have hit on her. But these weren't other circumstances, so he shook his head and said, "Nope, not my type."
"Your type?" Logan repeated. "Your type is breathing. No offense, but you're kind of a slut." [On the one hand, Logan is right; on the other hand, that's not a very nice thing to say to your best friend…]
That stung a little, but James knew it was basically true. He just didn't want Logan to think of him like that.
He shrugged. "I know, but when it comes down to it... I like brunets."
"Okay," Logan said, and craned his neck, looking around. [Logan: still very clueless. It's weird, actually, because I don't think Logan on the show really has self esteem issues, but they often creep in when I write him. Because even though he's 100% aware of how smart he is, he's also surrounded by guys the show tells us repeatedly are better looking/more talented/more fun.] "There's a hot brunet at the bar, but she's kind of old for you. Unless you're into that."
The woman at the bar did kind of have a sexy cougar thing going on, but James shook his head. "Just relax. I'll let you know." [For the record, I would read about James and a sexy cougar. Weirdly, while I have no interest in older guy/younger girl, I can totally do older lady/younger guy. Someone should write me keptboy!James.]
"Okay, okay." Logan leaned back in his chair, one hand idly playing with his napkin. "I just don't see how a restaurant like this is going to help. People come here on dates, not because they're looking for dates." [Logan, your earth logic has no place in Big Time Rush.]
"I have a plan," James said. Which was true. He just didn't mention to Logan that picking up a date was not part of it.
"If you say so. I mean, just, jeez." Logan looked over at the violinist. "It looks like we're on a date."
James almost choked on his drink. "Wh-what?"
Logan nodded. "That's what I would think, if I were some girl walking by. I wouldn't stop to hit on you, is all. You should have gotten Kendall's help with this plan, James. You're not very good at scheming all on your own."
"I thought you were mad at Kendall."
Logan rolled his eyes. "I'm not. It's fine. He's a whore, but whatever." [Wow, Logan, be more passive aggressive.]
"So I'm a slut, he's a whore... you got any opinions on Carlos you want to share?"
"He's messy?" Logan shrugged. "I'm just saying. Kendall will make out with people he claims he doesn't want for cash --"
"Claims?" [And James is totally right here. Logan has no idea that he's projecting, but he totally, totally is.]
"-- and you'll make out with anyone, ever. But I'm neurotic and nerdy, so who am I to judge?" [Again, self esteem issues. idk.]
"I don't think you're neurotic," James said.
Logan gave him a crooked smile. "Only because you don't know what that means."
James laughed. "I'm pretty enough that I don't need to be smart." [Some insecurities aside, James does not really have self esteem issues. He's not exactly self-aware, but he does have a very good sense of his own strengths and weaknesses.]
"Well, we don't all have that going for us."
"True," James said, and let his gaze linger on Logan for a moment. "You're not pretty, but you're... I don't know. More than cute, but not old enough to be handsome."
"Um, thanks, I guess," Logan said, his cheeks going slightly rosy.
James grinned. Logan was adorable when he blushed.
--
So this was James' idea of a big night out. Logan was baffled, but every time he asked James how exactly the two of them eating a giant, fancy dinner was going to get James a date, James just laughed the question off. So it was weird. [Logan: forever clueless.]
But not bad. Logan was mostly used to hanging out with the guys as a group, but chilling with just James was... pretty nice, he decided cautiously. For all James spent most of his time checking his hair in the reflection of silverware, he was also funny and easy to get along with. [So one of the things I worry about when I write fic in general and especially slash is how to keep the guys in character and make sure they all still have their random idiosyncrasies. So James still checking himself out in the silverware was my attempt to call back to the fact that, while he does very much want Logan and is trying to be a good, romantic date here, he's still the guy who has trouble putting down his mirror.] And he had this way of dropping off-hand comments that made Logan feel... appreciated, he supposed. Logan knew James didn't really care about the history of chandeliers within interior design, but Logan had read about it somewhere and when he mentioned it, James didn't seem too bored by it, and then he made some comment about being impressed by how much random stuff Logan could remember. [I tend to read Logan's smartness as general knowledge sponge-iness, in that he has no idea where he picked up most of the things he knows, but he never really forgets facts, which is why he knows completely random things like the chemicals used in kitty litter. It's not quite the same as his actual academics, but he does generally just like learning and picks up facts and concepts very easily.]
It felt weird and warm and Logan had never noticed it before. He'd also never noticed the way James' whole face lit up when he laughed, or how easy it was to make James laugh, or how good it felt when he did it. [And yet he still does not pick up on the WHY of this. Which is actually really how I read him in canon -- he's gay (I can not even conceive of a heterosexual Logan) but hasn't worked that out yet; someday, some boy will kiss him and a lot of things will fall into place for him very quickly, but it simply hasn't occurred to him yet, which is why he doesn't seem to be that into Camille but goes along with their relationship nonetheless.]
As, after James handed over enough cash to pay for a semester at college, they stood up. Logan shook his head a little. "I don't know. I don't get it."
"What's to get?" James asked, leaning against him and nudging him with his elbow. James led the way out, ushering Logan with a hand on the small of his back. Then he added, "You want to see a movie or something?"
"Do I... what is this, dinner and a movie?" Logan asked. [Finally, an inkling! Yes, Logan. Yes, it is.] He peered into the parking lot and found their car. "That's what I don't get. The whole point of having a wingman is having someone to help you get laid, or get a date, or whatever, and --"
"Did you have a good time?" James interrupted.
"Well, yeah," Logan said, flushing. He had. If this was all James wanted from him, Logan actually wouldn't have minded doing it more than once, but that wasn't the point.
"Because so did I," James said. "In fact, I had a great time."
"Well, great." Logan hit the button to open the car door. "But my point stands. You didn't even look at any of the girls in there. Or any of the boys, for that matter, since I guess that's a thing you do." [Logan: smart about facts, not smart about people.]
"It is," James said. "And you're wrong. I absolutely was checking out this one guy. He just didn't notice."
"What?" Logan asked, a little stunned. He'd spent the whole night waiting, bracing himself for it, but hadn't seen James look at anyone.
"And I did get a good date out of it," James continued.
"James, what are you talking ab--"
"Logan," James interrupted. His voice was soft, but his tone was firm, and Logan fell silent. "I think I've got something in my eye," James continued. "Can you do me a favor and check?" [Okay, so I am a HUGE story structure nerd. Even before I know what James was going to do in his many seduction attempts, I knew that whatever he tried on Kendall first he was going to try on Logan later and that what failed with Kendall would work on Logan. The look-into-my-eyes thing was the easiest way to do it.]
Logan swallowed. "It's pretty dark out here, I wouldn't be able to --"
"Just. Just look. Please?"
So Logan stepped close to James and looked up into James' eyes.
And.
Oh.
The world spun away from him and he couldn't look away. James' eyes seemed infinitely deep, perfect, beautiful... And just like that, Logan knew that he hated listening to James talk about girls because he was jealous, stupidly, bitterly jealous; and he wasn't mad at Kendall over a stupid bet, he was mad at Kendall for getting what he wanted. And that was what it all came down to: want. [FINALLY, LOGAN. I find bits like this totally cathartic to write. My general theory is that if I'm writing them and am at a point where I just want them to make out already, and I *know* they will, presumably readers will feel similarly.]
Raw, desperate desire.
Oh. [I wish I'd put in a different one word line here, since "oh" is also right above.]
James ducked his head and kissed Logan. Logan felt arms around him, felt James pull him until they were body to body. Logan had been kissed before, and passionately at that, but it had been nothing like this. This was like James' eyes, like infinity, like everything he had no idea he craved...
But of course he craved it. Because everyone wanted James. That was the point, wasn't it? [And this is right back to Logan's self esteem issues. When kissed by a hot guy, his immediate reaction is not "awesome," it's "Why is he doing this?"]
Logan stumbled back and pushed James away. He felt for the door handle and opened it, ducked inside, and fumbled to get the key to the ignition and his seatbelt in place. He just sat there and stared out the windshield as James clamored over to the passenger side and slid in.
"Logan --" James started.
"Don't. You made your point. I get it."
"Get what?" James asked, his voice breaking.
"There's no one at the Palm Woods who wouldn't make out with you. I get it, okay? Did Kendall put you up to this?" [In fairness to Logan here, Kendall does have plenty of reason to want revenge on these two, but it's actually James that Kendall made that threat to. Oh well. (I totally intentionally left the idea of Kendall getting revenge open as a potential sequel, but never came up with anything I liked enough to write.)]
"No! No, Logan, I'm not --"
"I don't want to -- stop," Logan said. He swallowed hard and finally turned the key. "Just stop. Leave me a little dignity and leave me alone."
James didn't say anything on the whole ride home.
[Endnote: I actually initially debated having this kiss just go well and ending the fic here, but since the fic has made it explicit that James is bi, but Logan hadn't even thought about James (or boys in general) Like That throughout, I wanted to give Logan an actual coming to terms moment. Also, I love any excuse for further ~~feelings, but I needed to balance that out -- the entire first 2/3 are just hijinks and silliness, and then it's like BAM, FEELINGS kind of out of nowhere. So I wanted to end on a ridiculous note instead of a big kiss to try and give it a better sense of flow instead of having two disjointed tones. (This is the sort of thing I mean by "obsessed with story structure." Also, I'm super pretentious about writing. Clearly.)]