The Moment He Walked Away
Title: The Moment He Walked Away
Characters: Sun, Jin, Michael.
Pairings: Sun/Jin, Sun/Michael.
Rating: PG
Summary: For isis2015, who requested Sun. Sun struggles with her feelings for Michael, but only realises that she still loves Jin the moment he walks away from her.
She didn’t realise how much she still loved Jin until the moment he walked away from her.
They hadn’t been communicating for a long time, long before the affair with Jae Lee had begun. Sun had seen Jae Lee as an escape from the world she had thought she was escaping several years before, but had soon understood that there was to be no escape after all. As she had sat among the mourners at Jae’s memorial, Sun had wished she had been brave enough to leave Jin for Jae, and after everyone else had gone, she had sat at his graveside alone, reflecting on her life.
“I am sorry that I did not have the courage to leave Jin for you,” she had whispered. “But I promise that things will change, that I will not stay in this situation where I am unhappy.”
She’d thought of that again after she had met Michael. A part of Sun felt that just because she and Jin were there on the island together, they did not have to live as a couple. And she knew how Michael felt about her, although he tried to hide it.
Jin suspected, too, although Sun had played it down when he had confronted her, telling him it was ridiculous. “Is it?” Jin had asked, and secretly Sun had not been so sure he was wrong.
It would be easier to be with Michael, in some respects, she had thought. They’d talked about it briefly, after that almost-kiss Vincent had interrupted. Michael had talked about the idea of starting a new life on the island, something it sounded like Locke had been talking to people about. And it was true that he represented freedom, a chance for Sun to escape the stifling protectiveness of her husband. Yet Michael represented protection too, protection from the temper Jin had been seen to display.
She told Michael that she was trying to protect him, the day she had slapped him. Michael thought he understood what Jin was capable of, but there was still so much he didn’t know. Sun had never shared with him the pain she had felt on Jae’s death, or her suspicions of the role Jin had played. However, she knew she could not place all the blame on Jin. Sun carried her own share of guilt, which she had almost blurted out to Michael the day she told him the island was her punishment. She hadn’t felt she deserved the happiness Michael could offer her.
It wasn’t until she watched Jin walk out of her life, saw the pain in his eyes and knew she had caused it, that Sun understood that she still loved Jin after all. She no longer thought of the days he’d come home with blood on his hands, but remembered the romantic gestures from the early days of their relationship, gestures that he had proved at Sydney Airport that he was still capable of making.
But they were further apart than ever. Even though Sun had gone to Michael, told him that she thought it would be better if they kept their distance from each other for a while, she was still no further forward in rebuilding her relationship with Jin. She’d thought there was hope as they’d been thrown together the night Boone died, as she had translated the instructions to Jin as he prepared to help deliver Claire’s baby. Yet the next day, she had found herself turning to Kate for comfort and not to Jin, and had realised they were still as far apart as they ever were.
She’d thought long and hard about ways to reconcile with Jin before coming up with the idea of giving him the phonetically spelled English words to help him while he was on the raft. And for the first time in a long while, it had felt like they understood each other again.
Michael and Sun understood each other too in the moment they said goodbye before he boarded the raft. He’d looked at her, and she knew he’d understood; she had chosen Jin, it was always going to be Jin for her now. And with one last look, Michael had let her go, to the future she and Jin deserved.
Characters: Sun, Jin, Michael.
Pairings: Sun/Jin, Sun/Michael.
Rating: PG
Summary: For isis2015, who requested Sun. Sun struggles with her feelings for Michael, but only realises that she still loves Jin the moment he walks away from her.
She didn’t realise how much she still loved Jin until the moment he walked away from her.
They hadn’t been communicating for a long time, long before the affair with Jae Lee had begun. Sun had seen Jae Lee as an escape from the world she had thought she was escaping several years before, but had soon understood that there was to be no escape after all. As she had sat among the mourners at Jae’s memorial, Sun had wished she had been brave enough to leave Jin for Jae, and after everyone else had gone, she had sat at his graveside alone, reflecting on her life.
“I am sorry that I did not have the courage to leave Jin for you,” she had whispered. “But I promise that things will change, that I will not stay in this situation where I am unhappy.”
She’d thought of that again after she had met Michael. A part of Sun felt that just because she and Jin were there on the island together, they did not have to live as a couple. And she knew how Michael felt about her, although he tried to hide it.
Jin suspected, too, although Sun had played it down when he had confronted her, telling him it was ridiculous. “Is it?” Jin had asked, and secretly Sun had not been so sure he was wrong.
It would be easier to be with Michael, in some respects, she had thought. They’d talked about it briefly, after that almost-kiss Vincent had interrupted. Michael had talked about the idea of starting a new life on the island, something it sounded like Locke had been talking to people about. And it was true that he represented freedom, a chance for Sun to escape the stifling protectiveness of her husband. Yet Michael represented protection too, protection from the temper Jin had been seen to display.
She told Michael that she was trying to protect him, the day she had slapped him. Michael thought he understood what Jin was capable of, but there was still so much he didn’t know. Sun had never shared with him the pain she had felt on Jae’s death, or her suspicions of the role Jin had played. However, she knew she could not place all the blame on Jin. Sun carried her own share of guilt, which she had almost blurted out to Michael the day she told him the island was her punishment. She hadn’t felt she deserved the happiness Michael could offer her.
It wasn’t until she watched Jin walk out of her life, saw the pain in his eyes and knew she had caused it, that Sun understood that she still loved Jin after all. She no longer thought of the days he’d come home with blood on his hands, but remembered the romantic gestures from the early days of their relationship, gestures that he had proved at Sydney Airport that he was still capable of making.
But they were further apart than ever. Even though Sun had gone to Michael, told him that she thought it would be better if they kept their distance from each other for a while, she was still no further forward in rebuilding her relationship with Jin. She’d thought there was hope as they’d been thrown together the night Boone died, as she had translated the instructions to Jin as he prepared to help deliver Claire’s baby. Yet the next day, she had found herself turning to Kate for comfort and not to Jin, and had realised they were still as far apart as they ever were.
She’d thought long and hard about ways to reconcile with Jin before coming up with the idea of giving him the phonetically spelled English words to help him while he was on the raft. And for the first time in a long while, it had felt like they understood each other again.
Michael and Sun understood each other too in the moment they said goodbye before he boarded the raft. He’d looked at her, and she knew he’d understood; she had chosen Jin, it was always going to be Jin for her now. And with one last look, Michael had let her go, to the future she and Jin deserved.