Because sometimes you really do run out of time
This is the letter I wrote to my granddad. He had been sick in hospital for 3 weeks but I just kept putting off writing it. Eventually, when mum told me he only had a week or two left, I knuckled down and wrote it. Adrian looked after the kids for me so I could concentrate, despite being so ill he should have been in bed. Granddad died about 8 hours after I'd written this, before we'd even put a stamp on the envelope, on Sunday morning. The hardcopy with photos and the picture Jamie drew is still on my desk. I haven't decided what to do with it yet.
April 15, 2010
Dear Granddad,
I wish we were able to come back to the UK to give you some extra company while you’re stuck in bed. Since that’s not possible, I thought I’d send you some photos and some recent news instead.
It was Jamie’s second birthday a couple of weeks ago. The children and I have been taking music classes for a few months now, and he really enjoys all the instruments they get to play with. So we bought him a set of percussion instruments - a tambourine, maracas, castanets, bells and so on - and a ukulele, which turns out to be a perfect first string instrument for a toddler. He enjoys having them at home and he plays with them a lot, especially if we put music on he can play along to. He’s usually generous and lets Katie play with them too, although we tend to keep her away from the ukulele.
Music class is every week, in 10-week sessions, and the classes are for children from newborn to five year olds, all in the same group. This session there is a little girl in the class with severe developmental disabilities. She’s actually Jamie’s age, but she acts and appears more like Katie. Last class Jamie was paying so much attention to her! He was trying to hold her hand in the “free dance” section, and when the class teacher brought out the instruments for the kids to play with, Jamie started taking a selection over to her. I joked that clearly Jamie thinks he doesn’t have enough sisters yet!
Jamie is now starting to talk, making a lot of different sounds and really trying to copy the words we say to him. He has been saying “mummy” and “daddy” for quite some time, although he still can’t say “Jamie” or “Katie”. His newest words are “red” (eh), “blue” (doo) and “yellow” (elelelohl). Right now Adrian is in the kitchen and Jamie is chattering away to himself, and Adrian keeps thinking I’m trying to talk to him. So apparently Jamie and I sound a lot alike (and also, I guess I don’t make much sense!)
Katie is trying to learn to walk. She can pull herself up to standing on anything that’s more than a few inches tall, and she just stood up all by herself in the middle of the room, although I missed it - Adrian had to tell me about it. She loves to walk if you hold her hands, and she’ll walk quite happily for a couple of minutes if she has the space. It’s been lovely weather here, so she’s been doing a lot of walking out on the lawn.
Katie is also getting very involved in music class. Obviously she’s not yet as coordinated as the older children but she makes a lot of attempts to copy the actions with the songs, and she tries to play a lot of the instruments too. The class gives us a CD which we play in the car and they both sing along.
We have a nanny who comes to our house four afternoons a week so that I can do some tutoring. I have four students right now, although since the end of the year - and thus end of year exams - is coming up, I’ll probably get a few more in the next couple of weeks. I’m also still running the tutoring business finding students to refer to other tutors. With the slow economy there hasn’t been much business this year, but I keep hoping it will pick up.
Adrian is now working with a new team, and so he has to get to know a lot of new people. There seem to be a lot more meetings than there were with his previous team! I think he’s enjoying the new work, but he doesn’t talk about work very much.
Adrian and I are hoping to start dancing again soon. Now that the kids are better at going to bed, we think they will be more amenable to having a baby sitter look after them in the evening - especially since our nanny will probably be able to sit for us. There is a dance class which we used to attend before we had children, which we will likely return to. In fact the last time we went I was eight months pregnant with Jamie, which probably looked very silly on the dance floor! They do lots of different styles of dance which suits us well.
We recently had the garden planted and the lawn set after three years of nothing but mud left over from the construction of the new house. The lawn we have is actually fake - modern Astroturf, but very much nicer to walk on. It’s actually so close to looking like real grass that the biggest give-away is how perfect it looks. They even have different colors of lawn to match the grass that grows in the local climate: one for us here in Washington, a different one for lawns in Arizona, etc. And despite being plastic it’s very soft, like a carpet. The biggest difference I’ve noticed is that it gets very much hotter in the sun than real grass does, which is unfortunate. I wish I had had the time to plant the garden myself, but with the children so small I can’t seem to find enough time for things like that. We have herbs, blueberry bushes and strawberry plants in pots on the deck, so at least we’re growing some of our own food. Maybe one day I’ll have a proper kitchen garden. Both the children love being outside, and Jamie was completely fascinated with the planting being done. I think he’d enjoy a little garden of his own in a few years.
I have enclosed a number of photos from mum and dad’s recent trip out to see us. I’ve also put in a picture Jamie drew when I asked him to draw something for you. It seems that he thinks you need more purple in your life!
We miss you very much, and we send you all our love,
Emma, Adrian, Jamie and Katie
April 15, 2010
Dear Granddad,
I wish we were able to come back to the UK to give you some extra company while you’re stuck in bed. Since that’s not possible, I thought I’d send you some photos and some recent news instead.
It was Jamie’s second birthday a couple of weeks ago. The children and I have been taking music classes for a few months now, and he really enjoys all the instruments they get to play with. So we bought him a set of percussion instruments - a tambourine, maracas, castanets, bells and so on - and a ukulele, which turns out to be a perfect first string instrument for a toddler. He enjoys having them at home and he plays with them a lot, especially if we put music on he can play along to. He’s usually generous and lets Katie play with them too, although we tend to keep her away from the ukulele.
Music class is every week, in 10-week sessions, and the classes are for children from newborn to five year olds, all in the same group. This session there is a little girl in the class with severe developmental disabilities. She’s actually Jamie’s age, but she acts and appears more like Katie. Last class Jamie was paying so much attention to her! He was trying to hold her hand in the “free dance” section, and when the class teacher brought out the instruments for the kids to play with, Jamie started taking a selection over to her. I joked that clearly Jamie thinks he doesn’t have enough sisters yet!
Jamie is now starting to talk, making a lot of different sounds and really trying to copy the words we say to him. He has been saying “mummy” and “daddy” for quite some time, although he still can’t say “Jamie” or “Katie”. His newest words are “red” (eh), “blue” (doo) and “yellow” (elelelohl). Right now Adrian is in the kitchen and Jamie is chattering away to himself, and Adrian keeps thinking I’m trying to talk to him. So apparently Jamie and I sound a lot alike (and also, I guess I don’t make much sense!)
Katie is trying to learn to walk. She can pull herself up to standing on anything that’s more than a few inches tall, and she just stood up all by herself in the middle of the room, although I missed it - Adrian had to tell me about it. She loves to walk if you hold her hands, and she’ll walk quite happily for a couple of minutes if she has the space. It’s been lovely weather here, so she’s been doing a lot of walking out on the lawn.
Katie is also getting very involved in music class. Obviously she’s not yet as coordinated as the older children but she makes a lot of attempts to copy the actions with the songs, and she tries to play a lot of the instruments too. The class gives us a CD which we play in the car and they both sing along.
We have a nanny who comes to our house four afternoons a week so that I can do some tutoring. I have four students right now, although since the end of the year - and thus end of year exams - is coming up, I’ll probably get a few more in the next couple of weeks. I’m also still running the tutoring business finding students to refer to other tutors. With the slow economy there hasn’t been much business this year, but I keep hoping it will pick up.
Adrian is now working with a new team, and so he has to get to know a lot of new people. There seem to be a lot more meetings than there were with his previous team! I think he’s enjoying the new work, but he doesn’t talk about work very much.
Adrian and I are hoping to start dancing again soon. Now that the kids are better at going to bed, we think they will be more amenable to having a baby sitter look after them in the evening - especially since our nanny will probably be able to sit for us. There is a dance class which we used to attend before we had children, which we will likely return to. In fact the last time we went I was eight months pregnant with Jamie, which probably looked very silly on the dance floor! They do lots of different styles of dance which suits us well.
We recently had the garden planted and the lawn set after three years of nothing but mud left over from the construction of the new house. The lawn we have is actually fake - modern Astroturf, but very much nicer to walk on. It’s actually so close to looking like real grass that the biggest give-away is how perfect it looks. They even have different colors of lawn to match the grass that grows in the local climate: one for us here in Washington, a different one for lawns in Arizona, etc. And despite being plastic it’s very soft, like a carpet. The biggest difference I’ve noticed is that it gets very much hotter in the sun than real grass does, which is unfortunate. I wish I had had the time to plant the garden myself, but with the children so small I can’t seem to find enough time for things like that. We have herbs, blueberry bushes and strawberry plants in pots on the deck, so at least we’re growing some of our own food. Maybe one day I’ll have a proper kitchen garden. Both the children love being outside, and Jamie was completely fascinated with the planting being done. I think he’d enjoy a little garden of his own in a few years.
I have enclosed a number of photos from mum and dad’s recent trip out to see us. I’ve also put in a picture Jamie drew when I asked him to draw something for you. It seems that he thinks you need more purple in your life!
We miss you very much, and we send you all our love,
Emma, Adrian, Jamie and Katie