(no subject)
I live a very boring existence however this isn't necessarily a bad thing. The thing is: not only is my existence boring, it is also lonely. The fact that I always feel alone is what makes my existence a pitiful one, I am surrounded by people who I could easily become friends with but I don't. It's not that I don't like them, in fact most of the people that I come into contact with daily are cool or nice or generally good people I just don't do anything about it. I don't know if I just fail at small talk, or if I just fail at making a conversation with people or what, but it just so seems that I can never seem to do anything about it and I haven't any idea why. I am not sure if I'm boring because I'm lonely or if I'm lonely because I'm boring... But I never seem to have very many entertaining things happen. I know someone's going to read this and want to reply shit like "you need to make things happen for yourself." Someone always does and it's really fucking annoying. It's like sitting in a class that you've already been to, it's like 'learning' something you already know. I know that things don't happen unless you make them but I don't know why I don't attempt to make them happen.
One reasoning that I have for not doing anything is because I think I hate people. This is untrue, my experiences tell me that, when I think about it anyway, most people are generally nice people when no level of anonymity is involved. Most people don't want to seem like an ass, most of them want to be perceived as a good person and whether or not they are requires further investigation into their person. I wonder why people don't attempt to talk to me... I am terrible at initiating a conversation unless I say something undoubtedly stupid... It's not, however, my inability to maintain a conversation, it's that I cannot start them and most of the ones that people have do not interest me. If it's someone talking about what they did last weekend, that has a variable level of interest... If it's someone talking about something that I would deem entertaining, I might be able to throw in my 2 cents. I don't know what it is, do I not seem like an approachable person? Am I intimidating? If so, I don't mean to be...
My mind seems to be bouncing all over the place like a million bouncy balls being thrown out of the bed of a truck going 60mph onto the highway... I can't seem to focus on anything, everything I do seems to bore me in a short period of time (relating to the start: it's probably because I don't do anything different/new). I can probably trace out every day, I can probably figure out exactly how long it would take me to go from place to place to place on any given day and be accurate within minutes. I lead a very boring existence....
I also think I lost my MP3 player which is currently pissing me off........ Better pissed off than pissed on, I guess.
I am off in search of the celestial teapot.
One reasoning that I have for not doing anything is because I think I hate people. This is untrue, my experiences tell me that, when I think about it anyway, most people are generally nice people when no level of anonymity is involved. Most people don't want to seem like an ass, most of them want to be perceived as a good person and whether or not they are requires further investigation into their person. I wonder why people don't attempt to talk to me... I am terrible at initiating a conversation unless I say something undoubtedly stupid... It's not, however, my inability to maintain a conversation, it's that I cannot start them and most of the ones that people have do not interest me. If it's someone talking about what they did last weekend, that has a variable level of interest... If it's someone talking about something that I would deem entertaining, I might be able to throw in my 2 cents. I don't know what it is, do I not seem like an approachable person? Am I intimidating? If so, I don't mean to be...
My mind seems to be bouncing all over the place like a million bouncy balls being thrown out of the bed of a truck going 60mph onto the highway... I can't seem to focus on anything, everything I do seems to bore me in a short period of time (relating to the start: it's probably because I don't do anything different/new). I can probably trace out every day, I can probably figure out exactly how long it would take me to go from place to place to place on any given day and be accurate within minutes. I lead a very boring existence....
I also think I lost my MP3 player which is currently pissing me off........ Better pissed off than pissed on, I guess.
I am off in search of the celestial teapot.