(no subject)

[tee_07]

alright so last saturday i told myself that i wouldn't drink for one month.. well i did tonight. but one of the big reasons why i didn't want to was the fact that i was getting completely [spelling] smashed and i just wasn't being.. well me. i like drinking, i like having fun. tonight when everyone else was drunk and i wasn't i felt weird, out of place and i didn't really want to talk to anyone. and i just felt like a loser, not for not drinking but how i kept going and sitting by myself, lame. i don't need to drink to have fun, but i just don't like being the only sober person around people that are all drunk/drinking. so i drank, not because of that, but because i wanted to, i had wanted to all night, but i told myself i wouldn't. whatever, as long as i don't act like i did last weekend i don't mind. i just don't like being a wasted bitch, it's just not me. i'm normally the person that will give the shirt off my back to help a friend. i love my friends, treating them rotten just wasn't acceptable for me. so basically that was my main reason for trying to not drink. but i've decided that i can still drink, just not get totally wasted like i did. damn this is a long 'personal' entry. whatever i just have to poor my heart out somewhere, and typing is way easier than writing it by hand. i guess i just need to learn my limit. haha that will be my new goal, not to over-drink.

but besides that i had a wonderful time tonight, i realized that my friends are probably the greatest people i've ever met. and people are lucky to meet/know them.

work was okay today, it was really easy because i didn't really have anything to do. tomorrow night/tonight should be fun cuz i'm working with my jane.
okay, i'm done. bedtime.